《渺小一生》:冒險(xiǎn)試一次吧，另一個(gè)聲音說(shuō)

　 Take a chance, says the other voice. You’re lonely. You have to try. This is the voice he always ignores.

冒險(xiǎn)試一次吧，另一個(gè)聲音說(shuō)，你很孤單，你得試試看。這是他向來(lái)忽略的聲音。

　 This may never happen again, the voice adds, and this stops him.

這種機(jī)會(huì)可能不會(huì)再有了，那個(gè)聲音又說(shuō)，這句話讓他停了下來(lái)。

　 It will end badly, says the first voice, and then both voices fall silent, waiting to see what he will do.

結(jié)果會(huì)很慘的，第一個(gè)聲音說(shuō)。然后兩個(gè)聲音都沉默下來(lái)，等著看他會(huì)怎么做。

　 He doesn’t know what to do; he doesn’t know what will happen. He has to find out. Everything he has learned tells him to leave; everything he has wished for tells him to stay. Be brave, he tells himself. Be brave for once.

他不知道該怎么做，他不知道會(huì)發(fā)生什么事。他得弄清楚。他學(xué)到過(guò)的一切都叫他離開；但他期望的一切都叫他留下。勇敢一點(diǎn)，他告訴自己，就勇敢這一次吧。

　 And so he looks back at Caleb. “Let’s go,” he says, and although he is already frightened, he begins the long walk down the narrow hallway toward the elevator as if he is not, and along with the scrape of his right foot against the cement, he hears the tap of Caleb’s footsteps, and the explosions of rain pinging off the fire escape, and the thrum of his own anxious heart.

于是他目光回到凱萊布身上?！白甙??！彼f(shuō)。雖然他已經(jīng)開始害怕，但他還是假裝不怕，開始沿著狹窄的走廊朝電梯走。除了他右腳刮過(guò)水泥地的聲音，他還聽到凱萊布的鞋底接觸地面的聲音、雨水敲著防火梯的轟響，以及他自己跳得很急的焦慮心臟。

　 A year ago, he had begun working on a defense for a gigantic pharmaceutical company called Malgrave and Baskett whose board of directors was being sued by a group of their shareholders for malfeasance, incompetence, and neglect of their fiduciary duties. “Gee,” Lucien had said, sarcastically, “I wonder why they’d think that?”

一年前，他開始幫一個(gè)叫馬格瑞夫和巴斯克特（Malgrave and Baskett）的大型制藥公司辯護(hù)。這家公司的董事會(huì)被一群股東控告瀆職、無(wú)能、玩忽職守?！袄咸欤北R西恩那時(shí)還嘲諷地說(shuō)，“真不懂他們?yōu)槭裁磿?huì)這樣想？”

　 He had sighed. “I know,” he said. Malgrave and Baskett was a disaster, and everyone knew it. Over the previous few years, before they had come to Rosen Pritchard, the company had had to contend with two whistle-blower lawsuits (one alleging that a manufacturing facility was dangerously out of date, the other that a different facility was producing contaminated products), had been served with subpoenas in connection with an investigation into an elaborate kickback scheme involving a chain of nursing homes, and had been alleged to be illegally marketing one of their bestselling drugs, which was approved only for treatment of schizophrenics, to Alzheimer’s patients.

他聽了嘆氣：“我知道?！瘪R格瑞夫和貝斯凱這家公司根本是一塌糊涂，大家都知道。找上羅普克之前的那幾年，這家制藥公司不得不應(yīng)付兩宗內(nèi)部吹哨人提起的訴訟（一個(gè)指出該公司有一組老舊且危險(xiǎn)的制造設(shè)備，另一個(gè)指出另一組設(shè)備制造出了被污染的產(chǎn)品）。于是法院向該公司發(fā)出傳票，調(diào)查涉及了一連串養(yǎng)老院的復(fù)雜回扣案；此外公司也被指控非法營(yíng)銷該公司最暢銷的一種藥。那種藥物原先獲得核準(zhǔn)上市，只能治療精神分裂癥，結(jié)果卻用來(lái)治療阿茲海默癥。

　 And so he had spent the last eleven months interviewing fifty of Malgrave and Baskett’s current and former directors and officers and compiling a report to answer the lawsuit’s claims. He had fifteen other lawyers on his team; one night he overheard some of them referring to the company as Malpractice and Bastard.

于是，他花了十一個(gè)月訪談了五十名馬格瑞夫和巴斯克特的現(xiàn)任和前任主管，匯整出了一份答辯報(bào)告。他的團(tuán)隊(duì)里還有十五名律師，有天夜里加班，他聽到他們提到這家公司，叫它“弊端加混蛋”。

　 “Don’t you dare let the client hear you say that,” he scolded them. It was late, two in the morning; he knew they were tired. If he had been Lucien, he would have yelled at them, but he was tired too. The previous week, another of the associates on the case, a young woman, had stood up from her desk at three a.m., looked around her, and collapsed. He had called an ambulance and sent everyone home for the night, as long as they returned by nine a.m.; he had stayed an hour longer and then had gone home himself.

“你們敢讓客戶聽到就試試看。”他斥責(zé)他們。當(dāng)時(shí)很晚了，已經(jīng)凌晨2點(diǎn)，他知道他們很累。如果他是盧西恩，就會(huì)吼他們，但他也累了。前一個(gè)星期，團(tuán)隊(duì)里一名普通律師，是個(gè)年輕女性，凌晨3點(diǎn)從座位上站起來(lái)，轉(zhuǎn)頭看了一圈，就暈倒了。他叫了救護(hù)車來(lái)，讓其他人都回家，但隔天早上9點(diǎn)前要準(zhǔn)時(shí)上班；他自己又多待了一個(gè)小時(shí)才回家。

　 “You let them go home and you stayed here?” asked Lucien the next day. “You’re getting soft, St. Francis. Thank god you don’t act like this when you’re at trial or we’d never get anywhere. If only opposing counsel knew what a pushover they were actually dealing with.”

“你讓他們回家，然后自己留下來(lái)？”盧西恩第二天問(wèn)他，“你變得心軟了，圣弗朗西斯。幸好你在審判時(shí)不會(huì)這樣，要是讓對(duì)方律師知道他們的對(duì)手這么好欺負(fù)，我們連一場(chǎng)官司都別想贏了?！?

　 “So does this mean the firm isn’t going to send poor Emma Gersh any flowers?”

“這表示我們事務(wù)所不會(huì)送花給?，敗じ袷矄?？”

　 “Oh, we already sent them,” said Lucien, getting up and wandering out of his office. “ ‘Emma: Get better, get back here soon. Or else. Love from your family at Rosen Pritchard.’ ”

“哦，已經(jīng)送了?！北R西恩說(shuō)，站起來(lái)慢吞吞地走出他的辦公室，“‘?，?，養(yǎng)好身體，早點(diǎn)回來(lái)，不然走著瞧。愛你的羅普克大家庭?！?

　 He loved going to trial, he loved arguing and speaking in a courtroom—you never got to do it enough—but his goal with Malgrave and Baskett was to get the lawsuit tossed by a judge before it entered the grinding, tedious drone years of investigation and discovery. He wrote the motion to dismiss, and in early September, the district court judge threw out the suit.

他喜歡出庭，他喜歡在法庭里辯論、演說(shuō)，永遠(yuǎn)都不嫌多。但這回他跟馬格瑞夫和貝斯凱的目標(biāo)，是在進(jìn)入折磨人的、冗長(zhǎng)無(wú)聊、拖上好幾年的調(diào)查與收集證據(jù)開始之前，就讓法官撤銷這個(gè)案子。他寫了駁回原告起訴的申請(qǐng)書，九月初，地方法院的法官就駁回了。

　 “I’m proud of you,” Lucien says that night. “Malpractice and Bastard don’t know how fucking lucky they are; that suit was as solid as they come.”

“我真是以你為榮?！北R西恩那天晚上說(shuō)，“弊端加混蛋不知道他們有多幸運(yùn)，這個(gè)案子本來(lái)鐵定會(huì)輸?shù)??！?

　 “Well, there’s a lot that Malpractice and Bastard don’t seem to know,” he says.

“唔，弊端加混蛋好像真的不知道哦。”他說(shuō)。

　 “True. But I guess you can be complete cretins as long as you have enough sense to hire the right lawyer.” He stands. “Are you going anywhere this weekend?”

“沒(méi)錯(cuò)。不過(guò)我猜想，只要你有腦子找對(duì)律師，你就算當(dāng)個(gè)徹頭徹尾的白癡也沒(méi)關(guān)系?！彼酒饋?lái)，“你這個(gè)周末打算去哪里嗎？”

　 “No.”

“沒(méi)有?！?

　 “Well, do something relaxing. Go outside. Have a meal. You don’t look too good.”

“唔，做點(diǎn)放松的活動(dòng)吧。出門玩玩，吃頓大餐。你的氣色不太好?！?

　 “Good night, Lucien!”

“晚安，盧西恩！”

　 “Okay, okay. Good night. And congratulations—really. This is a big one.”

“好吧，好吧。晚安。恭喜了——真的，這回真的是大勝?！?