雙語·《刀鋒》 第三章 二

CHAPTER THREE 2
第三章 二

To give the reader a moment's rest I am starting here upon a new section, but I am doing it only for his convenience；the conversation was uninterrupted. I may take this opportunity to say that Larry spoke without haste, often choosing his words with care, and though of course I do not pretend to report them exactly, I have tried to reproduce not only the matter, but the manner of his discourse.His voice, rich in tone, had a musical quality that was grateful to the ear；and as he talked without gesticulation of any kind, puffing away at his pipe and stopping now and again to relight it, he looked you in the face with a pleasant, often whimsical expression in his dark eyes.
此處我另起一節(jié)，好讓讀者有片刻喘氣的機會。這樣做，完全是為了讀者考慮。拉里的敘述并沒有因此而中止。趁此機會，我想說，他敘述時不慌不忙，斟詞酌句的。雖然不敢說我能把他的話原封不動再現(xiàn)給諸位，但我做出了努力，不僅努力復述出事情的經(jīng)過，還努力再現(xiàn)他說話的方式。他的聲音圓潤，猶如天籟之音，十分悅耳。他說著，一口一口抽著煙斗，時不時會停下來把熄滅了的煙斗再點著，只是說，不加任何手勢。他直直望著我，烏黑的眼睛里有一種令人愉快的，并且讓人捉摸不透的表情。

“Then the spring came, late in that flat, dismal part of the country, cold and rainy still；but sometimes a fine warm day made it hard to leave the world above ground and go down hundreds of feet in a rickety elevator, crowded with miners in their grimy overalls, into the bowels of the earth. It was spring all right, but it seemed to come shyly in that grim and sordid landscape as though unsure of a welcome.It was like a flower, a daffodil or a lily, growing in a pot on the window-sill of a slum dwelling and you wondered what it did there.One Sunday morning we were lying in bed, we always slept late on Sunday morning, and I was reading, when Kosti said to me out of a blue sky：“‘I'm getting out of here. D'you want to come with me?'
后來，春天姍姍而至。在那片平坦而荒涼的鄉(xiāng)間，春天來得晚，天氣依然寒冷，細雨綿綿。不過，有時會出現(xiàn)一個晴暖天，惹得礦工們都不愿離開地面，坐著搖搖晃晃的電梯（電梯里會擠滿身穿骯臟工作服的礦工），鉆到數(shù)百英尺以下的地球深處去了。春天已經(jīng)露面，但羞羞答答不敢跨入這片陰冷、骯臟的礦區(qū)，好像害怕不受歡迎似的。它宛若一朵鮮花（水仙或百合），開在貧民區(qū)住房窗臺上的一個花盆里，叫你弄不懂它在那兒干什么。星期天的早晨，我們總是賴在床上不起來。在這樣的一個早晨，我正躺在床上看書，考斯迪望著外面的藍天，對我說道：‘我要離開這兒了。你愿意跟我一起走嗎？’

“I knew a lot of the Poles went back to Poland in the summer to get the harvest in, but it was early for that, and besides, Kosti couldn't go back to Poland.
我知道有許多波蘭人一到夏天就回他們國家割麥子，而現(xiàn)在還不到收割的季節(jié)。再說，考斯迪現(xiàn)在是有國不能回。

“‘Where are you going?'I asked.
‘你要到哪兒去？’我問道。

“‘Tramping. Across Belgium and into Germany and down the Rhine.We could get work on a farm that would see us through the summer.'
‘浪跡天涯——穿過比利時到德國，再沿萊茵河朝前走。夏天，就到農(nóng)場去打打零工?！?/p>

“It didn't take a minute to make up my mind. “‘It sounds fine，'I said.
我聽后，當下便做出了決定，于是說道：‘這主意挺不錯的?！?/p>

“Next day we told the foreman we were through. I found a fellow who was willing to take my grip in exchange for a rucksack.I gave the clothes I didn't want or couldn't carry on my back to the younger of Madame Leclerc's sons who was about my size.Kosti left a bag, packed what he wanted in his rucksack and the day after, as soon as the old girl had given us our coffee, we started off.
次日，我們告訴工頭，說我們不干了。我找到一個人愿意拿旅行背包換我的提包。我把不想要的，或者說不便路上帶的衣服，全都給了勒克萊爾太太的小兒子——他跟我的身材差不多。到了第二天，老太婆供我們喝了咖啡，我們就出發(fā)了。

“We weren't in any hurry as we knew we couldn't get taken on at a farm at least until the hay was ready to cut, and so we dawdled along through France and Belgium by way of Namur and Liège and got into Germany through Aachen.We didn’t do more than ten or twelve miles a day.When we liked the look of a village we stopped there.There was always some kind of an inn where we could get beds and an alehouse where we could get something to eat and beer to drink.On the whole we had fine weather.It was grand to be out in the open air after all those months in the mine.I don’t think I’d ever realized before how good a green meadow is to look at and how lovely a tree is when the leaves aren’t out yet, but the branches are veiled in a faint green mist.Kosti started to teach me German and I believe he spoke it as well as he spoke French.As we trudged along he would tell me the German for the various objects we passed, a cow, a horse, a man and so on, and then repeat simple German sentences.It made the time pass and by the time we got into Germany I could at least ask for the things I wanted.
一路上我們不慌不忙，因為我們知道起碼得等到麥收季節(jié)才能在農(nóng)場找到活干。我們就這樣慢慢悠悠從那慕爾和列日穿過法國及比利時，再經(jīng)由亞琛進入德國境內(nèi)。我們每天頂多走十英里或十二英里路，遇見中意的村子便歇腳。車到山前必有路——總能找到住宿的客棧和吃肉喝酒的酒館。總體而言，天氣還是不錯的。在礦上熬煎了那么多的日月，現(xiàn)在來到開闊的野外，感覺真好。以前真是沒有想到綠茵地竟是那么美不勝收；樹木尚未長出樹葉，而樹枝上蒙了一層薄霧般的新綠，竟會那么賞心悅目。后來，考斯迪開始教我學習德語——他的德語和法語講得一樣棒。走在路上，遇見形形色色的景物（或?；蝰R，或人及其他），他都會把相應的德語告訴我，還會叫我重復簡單的德語句子。時間就這樣悄然逝去。進入德國境內(nèi)時，我至少可以用德語問路了。

“Cologne was a bit out of our way, but Kosti insisted on going there, on account of the Eleven Thousand Virgins, he said, and when we got there he went on a bat. I didn't see him for three days and when he turned up at the room we'd taken in a sort of workmen's rooming-house he was very surly.He'd got in a fight and he had a black eye and a cut on his lip.He wasn't a pretty object, I can tell you.He went to bed for twenty-four hours, and then we started to walk down the valley of the Rhine towards Darmstadt, where he said the country was good and we stood the best chance of getting work.
科隆稍微偏離了一點我們的路線，可是考斯迪硬要到那兒去一趟，說是為了那一萬一千名殉道修女。等我們到了科隆時，他便恣意酗酒，一連三天不見人影。我們下榻的地方有點像工人宿舍。待他回到住處，一臉的慍色。原來，他跟人打了一架，眼睛都被打青了，嘴唇有一道血口子，可以說樣子很慘。他倒頭睡了兩天兩夜。然后，我們沿著萊茵河的河谷向達姆施塔特進發(fā)。他說那兒風光旖旎，而且我們極有可能找到工作。

“I never enjoyed anything more. The fine weather held and we wandered through towns and villages.When there were sights to see we stopped off and looked at them.We put up where we could and once or twice we slept in a loft on the hay.We ate at wayside inns, and when we got in the wine country we turned from beer to wine.We made friends with the people in the taverns we drank in.Kosti had a sort of rough joviality that inspired them with confidence and he'd play skat with them, that's a German card game, and skin them with such bluff good humour, with the earthy jokes they appreciated, that they hardly minded losing their pfennigs to him.I practised my German on them.I'd bought a little English-German conversation grammar at Cologne and I was getting on pretty well.And then at night, when he'd got a couple of litres of white wine inside him, Kosti would talk in a morbid way of the flight from the Alone to the Alone, of the Dark Night of the Soul and of the final ecstasy in which the creature becomes one with the Beloved.But when in the early morning, as we walked through the smiling country, with the dew still on the grass, I tried to get him to tell me more, he grew so angry that he could have hit me.
我從來都沒有如此開心過。天氣持續(xù)晴好。我們走過一個個小鎮(zhèn)、一座座村莊。遇見美麗的景色，我們就駐足欣賞。找見住宿的地方，我們便停下來過夜，有一兩次睡在稻草堆上。路邊有客棧，我們就進去飽餐一頓。進入盛產(chǎn)葡萄酒的地區(qū)時，我們就不喝啤酒，以葡萄酒取而代之了。在酒館里，我們結(jié)交了一些朋友。考斯迪粗獷而快活，贏得了酒友們的信任，于是大家一起打司卡特（一種德國的牌戲）。他談笑風生，一團和氣，暗中卻抽老千。他滿嘴粗俗的玩笑，很得酒友們的喜歡，所以也就不太在意輸錢給他了。我則借機練習說德語。在科隆的時候，我買了一本袖珍英德會話手冊，學習德語取得了很大的進步。一到晚上，兩大盅白葡萄酒落肚，考斯迪便以一種病態(tài)的口吻大談什么從孤獨逃離，最后還是孤獨，談靈魂的暗夜，談生靈與造物主合為一體的極樂境界?？墒谴稳涨逶?，走在明媚的鄉(xiāng)野間，青草上露水滴滴，我想讓他繼續(xù)講下去的時候，他卻勃然大怒，差點沒動手打我。

“‘Shut up, you fool，'he said.‘What do you want with all that stuff and nonsense?Come, let's get on with our German.'
‘住口，笨蛋！’他說道，‘亂七八糟的東西，講那些有什么意思！好啦，還是學德語頂用?！?/p>

“You can't argue with a man who's got a fist like a steam hammer and wouldn't think twice about using it. I'd seen him in a rage.I knew he was capable of laying me out cold and leaving me in a ditch and I wouldn't have put it past him to empty my pockets while I was out.I couldn’t make head or tail of him.When wine had loosened his tongue and he spoke of the Ineffable, he shed the rough obscene language that he ordinarily used, like the grimy overalls he wore in the mine, and he was well-spoken and even eloquent.I couldn’t believe he wasn’t sincere.I don’t know how it occurred to me, but I got the idea somehow that he’d taken on that hard, brutal labour of the mine to mortify his flesh.I thought he hated that great, uncouth body of his and wanted to torture it, and that his cheating and his bitterness and his cruelty were the revolt of his will against-oh, I don’t know what you’d call it-against a deep-rooted instinct of holiness, against a desire for God that terrified and yet obsessed him.
你是不能跟他犟嘴的——他那汽錘一般的拳頭可不是吃素的，說打你就會打你。他發(fā)火的樣子我可是領教過。他可以一拳把我打昏，將我丟在臭水溝里。趁著我昏迷不醒，他會掏光我的口袋。他這個人真是叫人捉摸不透。當葡萄酒打開他的話匣子，他談到至高無上的主宰時，他會避開平時講的那些粗野下流話，就像脫掉下井穿的骯臟的工作服一樣，換上一種很文雅的語言，滔滔不絕，口若懸河。要說他缺乏虔誠之意，我是不相信的?？刹恢趺次彝话l(fā)奇想，認為他下井干那種艱辛、非人的活兒，只是想折磨自己的肉體。他仿佛憎恨自己那個丑陋、龐大的身軀，渴望叫它受點罪。他抽老千也罷，發(fā)脾氣也罷，抑或行為殘暴，都是他的意志（噢，不知怎么命名這種概念才好）對根深蒂固的神之本性的反抗，是對自己內(nèi)心欲望的反抗——他渴望見到既讓自己害怕又讓自己迷茫的上帝。

“We'd taken our time, the spring was pretty well over and the trees were in full leaf. The grapes in the vineyards were beginning to fill out.We kept to the dirt roads as much as we could and they were getting dusty.We were in the neighbourhood of Darmstadt, and Kosti said we'd better start looking for a job.Our money was getting short.I had half a dozen travellers'cheques in my pocket, but I'd made up my mind not to use them if I could possibly help it.When we saw a farmhouse that looked promising we stopped and asked if they wanted a couple of hands, I dare say we didn't look very inviting.We were dusty and sweaty and dirty.Kosti looked a terrible ruffian and I don’t suppose I looked much better either.We were turned down time after time.At one place the farmer said he’d take Kosti but couldn’t do with me and Kosti said we were buddies and wouldn’t separate.I told him to go ahead, but he wouldn’t.I was surprised.I knew Kosti had taken a fancy to me, though I couldn’t imagine why, as I didn’t begin to be the kind of guy he had any use for, but I would never have thought he liked me well enough to refuse a job on my account.I felt rather conscience-stricken as we walked on, because I didn’t really like him, in fact I found him rather repulsive, but when I tried to say something to show I was pleased with what he’d done, he bit my head off.
我們徐徐而行。已到了春末，樹上長滿了綠葉。葡萄園里的果實越來越豐滿。我們一直走的都是土路，路上塵土飛揚。進入達姆施塔特一帶時，考斯迪建議找個活兒干，因為身上帶的錢都快花光了。我口袋里倒還有六七張旅行支票，但我拿定主意不到萬不得已時不取出來使用。后來，我們看見一所農(nóng)舍樣子挺氣派，便停下來問他們要不要幫手。當時，敢說我們看上去不太討人喜歡——風塵仆仆，汗和塵土把我們都弄成了大花臉?？妓沟蠘幼酉駛€土匪，我的樣子恐怕也強不到哪兒去。于是，我們屢屢吃閉門羹。有一戶農(nóng)家愿意雇用考斯迪，卻不愿用我。考斯迪說我們是好朋友，是不能分開的。我叫他留下干，可他硬是不肯。這叫我感到有點意外。他喜歡我，我是清楚的，其中的原因我想象不來，因為我并不是對他有用處的那種人。可是，至于說因為喜歡我，為了我而放棄一個工作，就是我始料未及的了。離開那戶農(nóng)家后，我感到良心大受譴責，因為實際上我并不喜歡他，甚至很討厭他。但是，當我想要說幾句話，表示我對他這樣做感到高興時，他把我臭罵了一頓。

“But at last our luck turned. We'd just gone through a village in a hollow and we came to a rambling farmhouse that didn't look so bad.We knocked at the door and a woman opened it.We offered ourselves as usual.We said we didn't want any wages, but were willing to work for our board and lodging, and to my surprise instead of slamming the door in our face, she told us to wait.She called to someone inside the house and presently a man came out.He had a good stare at us and asked us where we came from.He asked to see our papers.He gave me another stare when he saw I was American.He didn't seem to like it very much, but anyhow he asked us to come in and have a glass of wine.He took us into the kitchen and we sat down.The woman brought a flagon and some glasses.He told us that his hired man had been gored by a bull and was in hospital and wouldn't be fit for anything till after the harvest was in.With so many men killed, and others going into the factories that were springing up along the Rhine, it was the devil’s own job to get labour.We knew that and had been counting on it.Well, to make a long story short he said he’d take us.There was plenty of room in the house, but I suppose he didn’t fancy having us there；anyway he told us there were two beds in the hayloft and that was where we were to sleep.
最后，我們終于時來運轉(zhuǎn)了。話說我們剛剛走出一個山谷里的村莊，便瞧見了一所獨門獨戶的農(nóng)舍，外表看上去還不錯。敲了敲門，開門的是個女人。我們照例介紹了來意，聲稱不要工錢，只管吃住就行了。想不到的是，她沒有當著我們的面砰的一聲把門關上，而是叫我們稍候。她沖屋里叫人，很快有一個男子走了出來。此人把我們細細打量一番，問我們從何處來，叫我們出示證件。他發(fā)現(xiàn)我是個美國人，便把我多看了一眼，似乎不太樂意用我。不過，他還是請我們進屋先喝杯酒再說。他領我們進了廚房，大家一起坐下。那女人端來一壺酒和幾個杯子。男子告訴我們，說他家的雇工被公牛抵傷了，現(xiàn)在醫(yī)院里，要等到莊稼收割之后才能康復。當?shù)厝擞性S多都戰(zhàn)死于疆場，活著的卻進了那些在萊茵河畔拔地而起的工廠里做工，于是便使得找個雇工十分艱難。這種情況我們是知道的，并且對此加以利用。長話短說，他最終決定雇用我們。他家的房間倒是不少，但他可能不愿讓我們住在他家，于是告訴我們說干草棚里有兩張床，我們可以宿在那里。

“The work wasn't hard. There were the cows to look after and the hogs；the machinery was in a bad way, and we had to do something about that；but I had some leisure.I loved the sweet-smelling meadows and in the evenings I used to wander about and dream.It was a good life.
農(nóng)場上的活不重，無非就是放牛牧豬什么的。機械壞了，就幫著修修?？臻e時間還是有的。我喜歡那些芳香的草地，傍晚時分經(jīng)常四處游蕩，做一做空夢。那是一種十分愜意的生活。

“The household consisted of old Becker, his wife, his widowed daughter-in-law and her children. Becker was a heavy, grey-haired man in his late forties；he'd been through the war and still limped from a wound in the leg.It hurt him a lot and he drank to kill the pain.He was generally high by the time he got to bed.Kosti got on with him fine and they used to go down to the inn together after supper to play skat and swill wine.Frau Becker had been a hired girl.They'd got her out of an orphanage and Becker had married her soon after his wife's death.She was a good many years younger than he was, rather handsome in a way, full-blown, with red cheeks and fair hair and a hungry sensual look.It didn't take Kosti long to come to the conclusion that there was something doing there.I told him not to be a fool.Wehad a good job and we didn't want to lose it.He only jeered at me；he said Becker wasn’t satisfying her and she was asking for it.I knew it was useless to appeal to his sense of decency, but I told him to be careful；it might be that Becker wouldn’t see what he was after, but there was his daughter-in-law, and she wasn’t missing anything.
這戶人家的家庭成員有貝克爾老夫婦，以及他們那帶著幾個孩子守寡的兒媳。貝克爾年近五旬，五大三粗，頭發(fā)花白。他打過仗，腿上負過傷，至今走路仍一瘸一拐的。腿傷叫他疼痛難忍，只好以酒消痛，常在睡覺前喝得酩酊大醉?？妓沟虾退嗵幍煤芎茫盹埡髸r常一起去酒館，打打司卡特牌戲，灌灌黃湯。貝克爾太太原來是家里的女傭，是他們從孤兒院里領來的，貝克爾在妻子死后不久便續(xù)娶了她。她比貝克爾小好多歲，也還有點姿色，豐胸肥臀，紅紅的臉蛋，一頭金發(fā)，妖妖嬈嬈的。考斯迪不久便斷言那女人是有些風情的。我警告他不要做傻事，說我們有份好工作，不能因此而丟掉。他僅僅只是嘲笑了我?guī)拙洌f貝克爾滿足不了她，是她自己想來一手的。我情知勸他守規(guī)矩也是白費口舌，但我還是告誡他三思而后行。貝克爾也許看不出他心懷鬼胎，可是他的兒媳卻是個明眼人，任什么都逃不過她的眼睛。

“Ellie, that was her name, was a thickset, big young woman, well under thirty, with black eyes and black hair, a sallow square face and a sullen look. She still wore mourning for her husband killed at Verdun.She was very devout and on Sunday mornings trudged down to the village to early Mass and again in the afternoon to vespers.She had three children, one of whom had been born after her husband's death, and she never spoke at meals except to scold them.She did little work on the farm, but spent most of her time looking after the kids, and in the evening sat by herself in the sitting-room, with the door open so that she could hear if one of them was crying, and read novels.The two women hated one another.Ellie despised Frau Becker because she was a foundling and had been a servant, and bitterly resented her being the mistress of the house and in a position to give orders.
他的兒媳名叫埃莉，是個又高又壯的少婦，年齡不足三十歲，黑眼睛，黑頭發(fā)，一張蠟黃的方臉老是郁郁不樂的。丈夫陣亡于凡爾登戰(zhàn)役，她仍在服喪期。她是個虔誠的教徒，每逢星期天早晨，都要到村子里去做早彌撒，下午又會跑去做晚禱。她有三個孩子，其中一個是遺腹子，是丈夫死后出生的。一家人吃飯時，她除了罵孩子，否則從不開口說話。她很少下地干農(nóng)活，大部分時間都用來看孩子。一到晚上，她就獨自一人坐在客廳里看小說，讓客廳的門敞開著，便于聽到孩子的哭聲。兩個女人勢同水火。埃莉瞧不起貝克爾太太，嫌她是個棄兒，做過用人。而今，貝克爾太太是一家之主婦，有權發(fā)號施令，這叫她氣不打一處來。

“Ellie was the daughter of a prosperous farmer and had brought a good dowry with her. She hadn't gone to the village school, but to Zwingenberg, the nearest town, where there was a girl's gymnasium, and she'd got quite a good education.Poor Frau Becker had come to the farm when she was fourteen and if she could read and write that's about all she could do.That was another cause of discord between the two women.Ellie lost no opportunity of showing off her knowledge, and Frau Becker, red in the face with anger, would ask what use it was to a farmer's wife.Then Ellie would look at her husband’s identification disc which she wore on a steel chain round her wrist and with a bitter look on her sullen face say：“‘Not a farmer's wife. Only a farmer's widow.Only the widow of a hero who gave his life for his country.'
埃莉是一戶富裕農(nóng)家的千金，嫁過來時帶了一筆不菲的嫁妝。她沒有在村里上學，而是去鄰近的茨溫根貝格城，上的是女子高級學校，受過良好的教育?？蓱z的貝克爾太太十四歲就來到了農(nóng)場當用人，能夠看得懂書、寫得了字，對她而言就很不錯了。兩個女人之間有裂痕，這也是其中的一個原因。埃莉一有機會就賣弄她的學問，會把貝克爾太太氣得滿臉通紅，就問要學問對于一個農(nóng)夫的妻子有什么用。這時，埃莉會看看自己用鋼鏈套在手腕上的亡夫的身份牌，陰沉的臉上浮現(xiàn)出兇狠的表情，說道：‘不是農(nóng)夫的妻子，而是農(nóng)夫的寡婦——只不過，這個農(nóng)夫是個為國捐軀的英雄。’

“Poor old Becker had his work cut out to keep the peace between them.”
“可憐的貝克爾老頭放著農(nóng)活干不成，在她們之間當起了和事佬?！?/p>

“But what did they make of you?”I interrupted Larry.
“插一句，他們是怎么看你的呢？”我打斷拉里的話問道。

“Oh, they thought I'd deserted from the American Army and couldn't go back to America or I'd be put in jail. That's how they explained that I didn't care to go down to the inn and drink with Becker and Kosti.They thought I didn’t want to attract attention to myself and have the village constable asking questions.When Ellie found out I was trying to learn German she brought out her old schoolbooks and said she’d teach me.So after supper she and I would go into the sitting-room, leaving Frau Becker in the kitchen, and I’d read aloud to her while she corrected my accent and tried to make me understand words I couldn’t get the sense of.I guessed she was doing it not so much to help me as to put something over on Frau Becker.
哦，他們把我當成了美軍的逃兵，不敢回到美國去，一回去就要被關進大牢。我不愿意跟貝克爾和考斯迪去酒館喝酒，他們認為就是因為這個緣故。他們覺得我是不想引起人們注意，不想招來村警盤問我。當埃莉得知我在學德語，便把她用過的舊課本拿了來，說要教我。于是，吃過晚飯后我們倆就會到客廳里去學習，把貝克爾太太一個人丟在廚房里。我大聲朗讀，埃莉為我糾音。遇到不懂的詞，她就給我解釋。我猜想她這樣做與其說是幫助我，還不如說是在向貝克爾太太傳達某種隱晦的意思。

“All this time Kosti was trying to make Frau Becker and wasn't getting anywhere. She was a jolly, merry woman and quite prepared to joke and laugh with him, and he had a way with him with women.I guess she knew what he was after and I dare say she was flattered, but when he started pinching her she told him to keep his hands to himself and smacked his face.And I bet it was a good hard smack.”
“考斯迪一直都在挖空心思勾引貝克爾太太，但是沒有進展。貝克爾太太高高興興、樂樂呵呵，跟他插科打諢、談笑風生，而他是個風月老手，自有一套手段。我猜她知道考斯迪的用心，敢說她為此而感到得意?？墒?，當考斯迪對她動手動腳時，她呵斥他放規(guī)矩些，還扇了他一記耳光。我敢說，那一耳光打得可真是不輕?！?/p>

Larry hesitated a little and smiled rather shyly.
說到這里，拉里猶豫了一下，難為情地笑了笑。

“I've never been the sort who thinks women are after me, but it occurred to me that-well, that Frau Becker had fallen for me. It made me rather uncomfortable.For one thing she was a lot older than me, and then old Becker had been very decent to us.She dished out the food at table and I couldn't help noticing that she helped me more liberally than the others, and she seemed to me to look for opportunities of being alone with me.She'd smile at me in what I suppose you'd call a provocative manner.She'd ask me if I had a girl, and say that a young fellow like me must suffer for the want of it in a place like that.You know the sort of thing.I only had three shirts and they were pretty well worn.Once she said it was a disgrace that I should wear such rags and if I’d bring them along she’d mend them.Ellie heard her and next time we were alone said that if I had anything to mend she’d do it.I said it didn’t matter.But a day or two later I found that my socks had been darned and my shirts patched and put back on the bench in the loft on which we kept our things；but which of them had done it I don’t know.Of course I didn’t take Frau Becker seriously；she was a good-natured old soul and I thought it might be just motherliness on her part；but then one day Kosti said to me：
我從來不覺得自己是個有女人緣的人?？墒俏乙老「械健械截惪藸柼瓷狭宋?。這叫我很不舒服。一是因為她比我大得多，二是由于貝克爾老先生對我們一直都很不錯。吃飯時，貝克爾太太管分菜，我暗中注意到她給我的菜總會比別人的多。她好像在找機會同我單獨在一起。她沖著我微笑——那種笑容可以說是具有挑逗性的。她問我有沒有女朋友，說我這樣的小伙子到這種地方來，身邊沒個女人一定會很痛苦的。她話里邊的含意你應該是清楚的。我只帶了三件襯衫，而且都穿得很破了。有一次，她說我破衣爛衫的怪丟人，叫我把襯衫交給她補一補。這話讓埃莉聽去了。一次，她趁旁邊沒人的時候說，如果我有縫縫補補的活兒，可以交給她做。我胡亂支吾了幾句?？墒?，一兩天后，我發(fā)覺自己襪子上的洞全補好了，襯衫也打了補丁，放回到了干草棚里的長凳上（我們的物件都擺放在這條凳子上）。這是她們倆哪一個的善舉，我不得而知。當然嘍，我并沒有將貝克爾太太當回事。她心眼好，可我覺得她的情感僅是母性的一種表現(xiàn)。可是有一天考斯迪對我說：

“‘Listen, it's not me she wants；it's you. I haven't got a chance.'
‘告訴你吧，她想要的不是我，而是你。我算是沒有戲了?！?/p>

“‘Don't talk such nonsense，'I said to him.‘She's old enough to be my mother.'
‘別胡扯！’我正色道，‘她年齡大得都可以當我的媽媽?！?/p>

“‘What of it?You go ahead, my boy, I won't stand in your way. She's not so young as she might be, but she's a fine figure of a woman.'
‘這有什么關系？你只管追她就是了，老弟，我不會礙你事的。她也許不那么年輕了，但身體還是挺有女人味的。’

“‘Oh, shut up.'
‘天呀，請你別說了?！?/p>

“‘Why d'you hesitate?Not on my account, I hope. I'm a philosopher and I know there are as good fish in the sea as ever came out.I don't blame her.You're young.I've been young too.Jeunesse ne dure qu’un moment.’
“為什么要優(yōu)柔寡斷呢？但愿不是為了我。我可是個達觀者，懂得”天涯何處無芳草的道理。我不怪她，因為你年輕么。我年輕時也風光過。應該趁年輕及時行樂。

“I wasn't too pleased that Kosti was so sure of what I didn't want to believe. I didn't quite know how to deal with the situation, and then I recalled various things that hadn't struck me at the time.Things said by Ellie that I hadn't paid much attention to.But now I understood them and I was pretty sure that she too knew what was happening.She’d turn up suddenly in the kitchen when Frau Becker and I happened to be alone.I got the impression that she was watching us.I didn’t like it.I thought she was out to catch us.I knew she hated Frau Becker, and if she had half a chance she’d make trouble.Of course I knew she couldn’t catch us, but she was a malevolent creature and I didn’t know what lies she mightn’t invent and pour into old Becker’s ears.I didn’t know what to do except to pretend I was such a fool I didn’t see what the old girl was up to.I was happy at the farm and enjoying the work and I didn’t want to go till after we’d got the harvest in.”
“考斯迪那樣捕風捉影，樣子那般深信不疑，叫我心中有點不悅。出現(xiàn)這種情況，我真不知該怎么對付才好。此時，我想起了一些以前沒有重視過的現(xiàn)象，想起了以前從未往心上放的埃莉的一些言語。我大有恍然大悟之感，堅信埃莉是知情的。貝克爾太太和我單獨在廚房里時，她會突然闖進來。我覺得她好像在監(jiān)視我們，這叫我很不高興。她可能是想捉奸哩。我知道她恨貝克爾太太，有點機會就恨不得生出些事端來。當然，若說捉奸，那是不可能的?？墒?，這個女人可不是個善茬，誰知道會編出什么謊話來灌進貝克爾老先生的耳朵里呢。我沒有脫身良策，只好裝癡裝傻，假裝不知道她們在演什么戲。在這個農(nóng)場，我日子過得開心，也喜歡這兒的農(nóng)活，絕不愿意在收麥之前就離開?！?/p>

I couldn't help smiling. I could imagine what Larry had looked like then, in his patched shirt and shorts, his face and neck burnt brown by the hot sun of the Rhine valley, with his lithe slim body, and his black eyes in their deep sockets.I could well believe that the sight of him set the matronly Frau Becker, so blonde, so full-breasted, all of a flutter with desire.
聽著聽著，我不禁啞然失笑。可以想象得來拉里當時的模樣——身穿綴著補丁的襯衣、短褲，臉和脖子被萊茵河的太陽曬得發(fā)紫，身體敏捷、苗條，黑黑的眼深嵌在眼窩里。我堅信，這種模樣一定會讓貝克爾太太這樣豐胸肥乳的金發(fā)主婦欲火中燒。

“Well, what happened?”I asked.
“后來怎么樣呢？”我問道。

“Well, the summer wore on. We worked like demons there.We cut and stacked the hay.Then the cherries were ripe, Kosti and I got up on ladders and picked them, and the two women put them in great baskets and old Becker took them into Zwingenberg and sold them.Then we cut the rye.And of course there were always the animals to look after.We were up before dawn and we didn't stop work till nightfall.I supposed Frau Becker had given me up as a bad job；as far as I could without offending her, I kept her at arm's length.I was too sleepy to read much German in the evenings and soon after supper I'd take myself off to our loft and fall into bed.Most evenings Becker and Kosti went to the inn down in the village, but I was fast asleep by the time Kosti came back.It was hot in the loft and I slept naked.
夏日的時光在流淌。我們像牛馬般干著活，收割完小麥，將麥稈堆成干草垛。后來櫻桃熟了。我和考斯迪就爬上梯子摘櫻桃，由兩個女人把摘下來的櫻桃裝進大籮筐，再由貝克爾老先生送到茨溫根貝格城里去賣掉。再接下來就是收割黑麥了。這期間，我們始終沒忘了放牛牧豬。我們天不亮就起來干活，天黑時才收工。我心想貝克爾太太可能覺得我是個不開竅的榆木疙瘩，不再理會我了。在盡量不得罪她的情況下，我跟她保持著一定的距離。一到晚上，我便困得不行，看不了幾眼德文書了，吃完晚飯就回到我們住的干草棚里，倒頭便睡。貝克爾和考斯迪晚上一般都要去村里泡酒館。等到考斯迪從酒館回來，我早已進入了夢鄉(xiāng)。干草棚里很熱，我睡覺時脫得精光。

“One night I was awakened. At the first moment I couldn't make out what it was；I was only half awake.I felt a hot hand on my mouth and I realized somebody was in bed with me, I tore the hand away and then a mouth was pressed to mine, two arms were thrown round me, and I felt Frau Becker's great breasts against my body.
一天夜里，我被弄醒了。開頭，我搞不清是怎么回事。就在我半睡半醒之際，只感到一只熱乎乎的手捂住了我的嘴，這才發(fā)覺有人和我睡在一起。我將捂在我嘴上的那只手推開，接著就有一張嘴貼在了我的嘴上，兩條胳膊把我摟緊。我感覺到那是貝克爾太太——她那豐滿的胸脯緊緊偎在我身上。

“‘Sei still，'she whispered.‘Be quiet.'
‘別出聲！別出聲！’她低聲說。

“She pressed up against me and kissed my face with hot full lips and her hands travelled over my body and she twined her legs in mine.”
“她身體緊緊抵住我，用滾燙、豐滿的嘴唇吻我，兩只手撫摸我的全身，兩條大腿夾在我的大腿中間?！?/p>

Larry stopped. I giggled.
拉里停了下來。我哧哧笑了幾聲。

“What did you do?”
“你是怎么反應的呢？”

He gave me a deprecating smile. He even flushed a little.
他沖我難為情地一笑，甚至臉都有點紅了。

“What could I do?I could hear Kosti breathing heavily in his sleep in the bed next to mine. The situation of Joseph has always seemed to me faintly ridiculous.I was only just twenty-three.I couldn't make a scene and kick her out.I didn't want to hurt her feelings.I did what was expected of me.
“我有什么辦法呢？旁邊的床上睡著考斯迪，他沉重的呼吸聲清晰可聞。約瑟夫的故事我一直都覺得有點可笑。我只有二十三歲呀。反正我覺得不便鬧起來將她趕下床。我不愿意刺傷她的感情，于是就依順了她?！?/p>

“Then she slipped out of bed and tiptoed out of the loft. I can tell you, I heaved a sigh of relief.You know, I'd been scared.‘Gosh，'I said，‘what a risk to take！'I thought it likely that Becker had come home drunk and fallen asleep in a stupor, but they slept in the same bed, and it might be that he'd woken up and seen his wife wasn't there.And there was Ellie.She always said she didn’t sleep well.If she’d been awake she’d have heard Frau Becker go downstairs and out of the house.And then, suddenly, something struck me.When Frau Becker was in bed with me I’d felt a piece of metal against my skin.I’d paid no attention, you know one doesn’t in those circumstances, and I’d never thought of askingmyself what the devil it was.And now it flashed across me.I was sitting on the side of my bed thinking and worrying about the consequences of all this and it was such a shock that I jumped up.The piece of metal was Ellie’s husband’s identification disc that she wore round her wrist and it wasn’t Frau Becker that had been in bed with me.It was Ellie.”
“完事后，她溜下床，躡手躡腳走掉了。可以說，我輕輕舒了口氣。要知道，我都快嚇死啦?！咸煅?，真是險??！’我對自己說。我想著貝克爾很可能吃得大醉回來，昏昏沉沉睡著了?？墒?，兩口子睡一張床，他一覺醒來不見了妻子，那該如何是好？另外，還有埃莉。她老說自己睡覺睡不踏實。萬一她醒著，聽見貝克爾太太下樓走出屋子，那該怎么辦呢？就在這時，我突然想起了一個細節(jié)——貝克爾太太和我睡在一起時，我覺得有個金屬片抵在了我身上。你也知道，在干那種事的時候，這種細節(jié)是注意不到的。我也一直沒有細想過那究竟是何物。突然，我若有所悟。當時我坐在床沿上，正愁腸百結(jié)，擔心此事會產(chǎn)生嚴重后果呢，一個念頭閃過我的腦際，驚得我跳了起來。那個金屬片其實是埃莉丈夫的身份牌，她歷來都是套在手腕上的。原來，和我同眠共枕的不是貝克爾太太，而是埃莉！”

I roared with laughter. I couldn't stop.
我聽了笑得肚子疼，想停也停不下來。

“It may seem funny to you，”said Larry.“It didn't seem funny to me.”
“你可能覺得好笑，”拉里說，“而我并不覺得?！?/p>

“Well, now you look back on it, don't you think there is just a faint element of the humorous about it?”
“你現(xiàn)在回想一下當時的情景，你不覺得其中有幾分幽默嗎？”

An unwilling smile played on his lips.
拉里嘴邊勉強地露出了一絲微笑。

“Perhaps. But it was an awkward situation.I didn't know what it was going to lead to.I didn't like Ellie.I thought her a most unpleasant female.”
“也許吧。不過，當時的處境很是尷尬。真不知事情會怎么收場呢。我不喜歡埃莉，覺得她是個非常討人嫌的女人。”

“But how could you mistake one for the other?”
“問題在于，你怎么會認錯人呢？”

“It was pitch dark. She never said a word except to tell me to keep my trap shut.They were both big stout women.I thought Frau Becker had her eye on me.It never occurred to me for a moment that Ellie gave me a thought.She was always thinking of her husband.I lit a cigarette and thought the position over and the more I thought of it the less I liked it.It seemed to me that the best thing I could do was to get out.
當時屋子里黑得伸手不見五指。她除了叫我不要作聲外，一句話也沒說。她們兩個身材都高大、壯實。我認為只是貝克爾太太看上了我，怎么也想不到埃莉也對我起了念頭。她一貫心里只有亡夫的呀。我點起一根煙，邊抽煙邊權衡自己的處境，越想越覺得不妙。三十六計，走為上計！

“I'd often cursed Kosti because he was so hard to wake. When we were at the mine I used to have to shake the life out of him to get him up in time to go to work.But I was thankful now that he slept so heavily.I lit my lantern and dressed, bundled my things into my rucksack-I hadn't got much, so it didn't take a minute-and slipped my arms through the straps.I walked across the loft in my stocking feet and didn't put my shoes on till I got to the bottom of the ladder.I blew out the lantern.It was a dark night, with no moon, but I knew my way to the road and I turned in the direction of the village.I walked fast as I wanted to get through it before anyone was up and about.It was only twelve miles to Zwingenberg and I got there just as it was stirring.I shall never forget that walk.There wasn't a sound except my footsteps on the road and now and then the crowing of a cock in a farm.Then the first greyness when it wasn’t yet light and not quite dark, and the first hint of dawn, and the sunrise with the birds all starting to sing, and that lush green country, meadows and woods and the wheat in the fields silvery gold in the cool light of the beginning day.I got a cup of coffee at Zwingenberg and a roll, then I went to the post office and sent a wire to the American Express to have my clothes and my books sent to Bonn.”
“平時我老怪考斯迪睡覺太死，叫都叫不醒。下井的那段時間，我常常為了讓他按時起床，上班不遲到，非得狠勁搖他不行。而此時他睡覺睡得死，我倒要感謝他了。點亮提燈，穿好衣服，我將自己的用品塞進背包里——東西不多，這一過程很快就完成了。然后，將背包背上肩，穿著襪子走過去，下了樓梯后才把鞋穿上，并吹熄了燈。夜晚漆黑一片，一點月光也沒有。好在我認得路，上了大道后便向村子那個方向走去。我走得很快，想趁著人們還未起床趕緊穿過村子。此處距離茨溫根貝格城只有十二英里的路程。抵達那兒時，街上剛開始有人走動。那段路程我終生難忘。路上，萬籟俱寂，只能聽得見腳下沙沙的腳步聲，還能聽見時不時傳來農(nóng)戶人家的公雞打鳴的聲音。后來，天空半明半暗，出現(xiàn)了魚肚白，再接下來就是曙光初露，太陽冉冉升起。只見百鳥啁啾，那綠油油的田野、草地和樹林以及田間的小麥都沐浴在靜謐的晨光里，像是披著金裹著銀。到了茨溫根貝格城里，我喝了杯咖啡，吃了塊面包，然后去郵局給美國運通公司發(fā)電報，叫他們把我的衣服和書寄到波恩去?！?/p>

“Why Bonn?”I interrupted.
“為什么要到波恩去？”我打斷他的話問。

“I'd taken a fancy to it when we stopped off there on our tramp down the Rhine. I liked the way the light shone on the roofs and the river, and its old narrow streets, and its villas and gardens and avenues of chestnut trees and the rococo buildings of the university.It struck me then it wouldn't be a bad place to stay in for a bit.But I thought I'd better present a respectable appearance when I got there, I looked like a tramp and I didn't think I'd inspire much confidence if I went to a pension and asked for a room, so I took a train to Frankfurt and bought myself a grip and a few clothes.I stayed in Bonn off and on for a year.”
“我們倆沿著萊茵河畔旅行時，曾在那兒歇過腳，我當時就喜歡上了那座城市。我喜歡看陽光照在千家萬戶的屋頂上以及河面上，喜歡那古老的窄街、別墅、花園和一排排的栗子樹，喜歡高等學府那洛可可式建筑。我覺得那是個挺不錯的地方，在那兒住上一段時間是很愜意的。不過，我認為到那兒去，最好先把自己收拾得像個樣。我看上去像個流浪漢，到哪戶人家找住處的時候，都可能得不到對方的信任。于是，我乘坐火車去了法蘭克福，買了個皮包和幾件衣服。在波恩，我斷斷續(xù)續(xù)住了有一年的光景。”

“And did you get anything out of your experience, at the mine, I mean, and on the farm?”
“你下井挖過煤，在農(nóng)場干過農(nóng)活，那樣的人生經(jīng)歷你有收獲嗎？”

“Yes，”said Larry, nodding his head and smiling.
“有?！崩稂c頭笑著說。

But he didn't tell me what it was and I knew him well enough by then to know that when he felt like telling you something he did, but when he didn't he would turn off questions with a cool pleasantry that made it useless to insist. For I must remind the reader that he narrated all this to me ten years after it happened.Till then, when I once more came in contact with him, I had no notion where he was or how he was engaged.For all I knew he might be dead.Except for my friendship with Elliott, who kept me posted with the course of Isabel's life and so reminded me of Larry, I should doubtless have forgotten his existence.
不過，他沒有說出究竟是什么樣的收獲。此時的我對他已非常了解，知道他愿意說，就一定會說的，如果不愿意說，那他會開個玩笑將話題引開，你再怎么問也是白搭。在此，我必須提醒讀者，這一切都是在事情發(fā)生十年之后他才告訴我的。在這以前，也就是我和他重又碰面之前，我不知他身在何方，也不知他在干些什么，亦不知他是生是死。要不是跟艾略特有點交情，從他那兒了解到一些伊莎貝爾的情況，從而回憶起拉里，我肯定早已忘掉有這個人了。