雙語·《刀鋒》 第三章 一

CHAPTER THREE 1
第三章 一

For ten years after this I saw neither Isabel nor Larry. I continued to see Elliott, and indeed, for a reason that I shall tell later, more frequently than before, and from time to time I learnt from him what was happening to Isabel.But of Larry he could tell me nothing.
這以后，有十年的時(shí)間我再也沒有見過伊莎貝爾和拉里。艾略特我倒是經(jīng)常見，而且由于某種原因（容我以后向諸位交代）見的次數(shù)更多了。從他的嘴里，時(shí)不時(shí)會(huì)聽到一些伊莎貝爾的情況?？墒顷P(guān)于拉里，他不能提供任何信息。

“For all I know he's still living in Paris, but I'm not likely to run across him. We don't move in the same circles，”he added, not without complacency.“It's very sad that he should have gone so completely to seed.He comes of a very good family.I'm sure I could have made something of him if he’d put himself in my hands.Anyhow it was a lucky escape for Isabel.”
“根據(jù)我了解的情況，他仍住在巴黎，只是不太可能碰上他的面。我們的社交圈子是不一樣的?！焙筮叺囊痪湔f出來時(shí)，他的語氣里透出一股自豪感，“他沉淪到今天這種樣子，叫人不勝傷感。論出身，他是相當(dāng)不錯(cuò)的。假如他聽我的話，我敢說我可以讓他有所作為的。不管怎么說，伊莎貝爾擺脫他，算是吉星高照了?！?/p>

My circle of acquaintance was not so restricted as Elliott's and I knew a number of persons in Paris whom he would have thought eminently undesirable. On my brief but not infrequent sojourns I asked one or other of them whether he had run across Larry or had news of him；a few knew him casually, but none could claim any intimacy with him and I could find nobody to give me news of him.I went to the restaurant at which he habitually dined, but found he had not been there for a long time, and they thought he must have gone away.I never saw him at any of the cafés on the Boulevard du Montparnasse which people who live in the neighbourhood are apt to go to.
我跟艾略特有所不同，并非只跟一定圈子里的人打交道。在巴黎，我有一些熟人，在艾略特看來登不了大雅之堂。我雖然時(shí)常經(jīng)過巴黎，但是待的時(shí)間都不太長。我曾經(jīng)問過一兩位熟人是否見過拉里，有沒有他的消息。有幾個(gè)熟人跟拉里是認(rèn)識(shí)的，但沒有一個(gè)和他是深交，于是無人了解他的近況。我去他常吃晚飯的那家餐館打聽消息，卻發(fā)現(xiàn)他已經(jīng)好久不去了，餐館里的人說他可能搬走了。在附近居民常去的蒙巴納斯林蔭道上的那些咖啡館，我也沒有發(fā)現(xiàn)他的蹤跡。

His intention, after Isabel left Paris, was to go to Greece, but this he abandoned. What he actually did he told me himself many years later, but I will relate it now because it is more convenient to place events as far as I can in chronological order.He stayed on in Paris during the summer and worked without a break till autumn was well advanced.
在伊莎貝爾離開巴黎之后，他原打算去希臘，后來放棄了。當(dāng)時(shí)的實(shí)際情況，他多年以后才親口告訴了我。不過，為了把事情盡量按照時(shí)間順序排列，讀起來方便些，我還是在此處對(duì)諸位講一講吧。他整個(gè)夏天都住在巴黎，苦讀不休，直至深秋。

“I thought I needed a rest from books then，”he said，“I'd been working from eight to ten hours a day for two years. So I went to work in a coal mine.”
“那時(shí)我覺得需要放下書本，休息休息。”他說道，“我每天看八至十個(gè)小時(shí)的書，已有兩年的時(shí)間了。于是，我就去了一座煤礦找活干?！?/p>

“You did what?”I cried.
“你去哪里啦？”我失聲叫道。

He laughed at my astonishment.
他見我一臉的驚訝，不由哈哈笑了。

“I thought it would do me good to spend a few months in manual labour. I had a notion it would give me an opportunity to sort my thoughts and come to terms with myself.”
“我認(rèn)為干幾個(gè)月的體力活對(duì)我有好處。我有一種感覺，干體力活能叫我理清思緒，使心情恢復(fù)平靜?！?/p>

I was silent. I wondered whether that was the only reason for this unexpected step or whether it was connected with Isabel's refusal to marry him.The fact was, I didn't know at all how deeply he loved her.Most people when they're in love invent every kind of reason to persuade themselves that it's only sensible to do what they want.I suppose that's why there are so many disastrous marriages.They are like those who put their affairs in the hands of someone they know to be a crook, but who happens to be an intimate friend because, unwilling to believe that a crook is a crook first and a friend afterwards, they are convinced that, however dishonest he may be with others, he won’t be so with them.Larry was strong enough to refuse to sacrifice for Isabel’s sake the life that he thought was the life for him, but it may be that to lose her was bitterer to endure than he had expected.It may be that like most of us he wanted to eat his cake and have it.
我沒有吱聲。我真不清楚，這是他邁出這出乎人意料之外的一步的唯一原因，還是與伊莎貝爾拒絕嫁給他也有關(guān)系。實(shí)際上，我也不知道他愛伊莎貝爾究竟有多深。大多數(shù)人在戀愛的時(shí)候會(huì)想出各種理由說服自己，認(rèn)為按自己的心愿做事是合情合理的。天下婚姻多悲劇，恐怕這就是癥結(jié)了。這情況就像有些人將自己的事情交給一個(gè)騙子去做一樣——他們明明知道此人是騙子，卻跟他關(guān)系很好，于是就不愿意相信他行騙會(huì)對(duì)朋友下手；他們堅(jiān)信，他雖然對(duì)別人居心叵測，對(duì)自己決不會(huì)如此。拉里不肯為了伊莎貝爾犧牲自己心儀的生活，其意志相當(dāng)堅(jiān)定，可是失掉伊莎貝爾卻又給他帶來了痛苦，想不到竟如此難以忍受。這可能就是我們通常所說的“魚和熊掌不可兼得”。

“Well, go on，”I said.
“哦，你繼續(xù)講?！蔽艺f道。

“I packed my books and my clothes in a couple of trunks and got the American Express to store them. Then I putan extra suit and some linen in a grip and started off.My Greek teacher had a sister who was married to the manager of a mine near Lens and he gave me a letter to him.D'you know Lens?”
“我把書和衣服放在兩只箱子里，交給美國運(yùn)通公司保管。然后把一套替換的衣服和一些內(nèi)衣打了個(gè)包，就動(dòng)身了。我的希臘語教師有個(gè)妹妹嫁給了蘭斯附近一座煤礦的經(jīng)理，便寫了一封信介紹我去見他。你知道蘭斯吧？”

“No.”
“不知道?！?/p>

“It's in the North of France, not far from the Belgian border. I only spent a night there, at the station hotel, and next day I took a local to the place where the mine was.Ever been to a mining village?”
“在法國北部，離比利時(shí)邊界不遠(yuǎn)。我下榻于車站旅館，在蘭斯只待了一個(gè)晚上，次日就乘坐當(dāng)?shù)氐幕疖嚾チ嗣旱V。你去過礦區(qū)嗎？”

“In England.”
“在英國去過?！?/p>

“Well, I suppose it's much the same. There's the mine and the manager's house, rows and rows of trim little two-storey houses, all alike, exactly alike, and it's so monotonous it makes your heart sink.There's a newish, ugly church and several bars.It was bleak and cold when I got there and a thin rain was falling.I went to the manager’s office and sent in my letter.He was a little, fat man with red cheeks and the look of a guy who enjoys his food.They were short of labour, a lot of miners had been killed in the war, and there were a good many Poles working there, two or three hundred, I should think.He asked me one or two questions, he didn’t much like my being an American, he seemed to think it rather fishy, but his brother-in-law’s letter spoke well of me and anyhow he was glad to have me.He wanted to give me a job on the surface, but I told him I wanted to work down below.He said I’d find it hard if I wasn’t used to it, but I told him I was prepared for that, so then he said I could be helper to a miner.That was boy’s work really, but there weren’t enough boys to go round.He was a nice fellow；he asked me if I’d done anything about finding a lodging, and when I told him I hadn’t he wrote an address on a piece of paper and said that if I went there the woman of the house would let me have a bed.She was the widow of a miner who’d been killed and her two sons were working in the mine.
反正都差不多吧。那兒有煤礦，有經(jīng)理的房子，還有兩層高的礦工小屋，一排一排的，千篇一律，完全是一種模樣，單調(diào)得讓你的心直朝下沉。教堂是新建的，樣子很難看。另外，街上還有幾家酒吧間。我到達(dá)礦區(qū)時(shí)，天氣陰冷，空中飄著毛毛細(xì)雨。我找到經(jīng)理的辦公室，把信交給了他。經(jīng)理是個(gè)矮胖子，兩頰紅紅的，看上去像是個(gè)貪嘴的人。礦上正缺工人，因?yàn)樵S多礦工都死在了戰(zhàn)場上。有不少波蘭人在此處打工，大概有兩三百人吧。經(jīng)理問了我一兩個(gè)問題。他一聽我是個(gè)美國人，好像覺得來頭有些蹊蹺。不過，他的小舅子把我夸成了一朵花，他也就樂于雇用我了。他要給我一個(gè)地面上的工作，可我說自己想下井。他說如果不習(xí)慣，在井下會(huì)吃不消的。我說自己已有心理準(zhǔn)備。末了，他叫我給一個(gè)礦工當(dāng)幫手。其實(shí)，那是童工干的活，只是眼下童工太少，不夠用罷了。這位經(jīng)理是個(gè)挺不錯(cuò)的人。他問我找到住處了沒有，我說還沒有找到。他便拿過一張紙寫了個(gè)地址，說按這個(gè)地址找去，會(huì)有一位家庭主婦給我安排睡覺的地方的。那是個(gè)寡婦，丈夫是礦工，死于戰(zhàn)火之中，她有兩個(gè)兒子在礦上工作。

“I took up my grip and went on my way. I found the house, and the door was opened for me by a tall, gaunt woman with greying hair and big, dark eyes.She had good features and she must have been nice-looking once.She wouldn't have been bad then in a haggard way except for two missing front teeth.She told me she hadn't a room, but there were two beds in a room she'd let to a Pole and I could have the other one.Her two sons had one of the upstairs rooms and she had the other.The room she showed me was on the ground floor and supposed, I imagined, to be the living-room；I should have liked a room to myself, but I thought I'd better not be fussy；and the drizzle had turned into a steady, light rain and I was wet already.I didn't want to go farther and get soaked to the skin.So I said that would suit me and I settled in.They used the kitchen as a living-room.It had a couple of rickety armchairs in it.There was a coal shed in the yard which was also the bathhouse.The two boys and the Pole had taken their lunch with them, but she said I could eat with her at midday.I sat in the kitchen afterwards smoking and while she went on with her work she told me all about herself and her family.The others came in at the end of their shift.The Pole first and then the two boys.The Pole passed through the kitchen, nodded to me with-out speaking when our landlady told him I was to share his room, took a great kettle off the hob and went off to wash himself in the shed.The two boys were tall good-looking fellows notwithstanding the grime on their faces, and seemed inclined to be friendly.They looked upon me as a freak because I was American.One of them was nineteen, off to his military service in a few months, and the other eighteen.
我拿起包袱，就告辭了。找到那戶人家后，開門的是一個(gè)瘦高個(gè)女人，頭發(fā)花白，有一雙烏黑的大眼睛。她五官端正，年輕時(shí)一定頗有姿色。如果不是因?yàn)樯倭藘深w門牙，就是現(xiàn)在也不一定會(huì)難看，會(huì)如此憔悴。她告訴我，說沒有空房間了，但一個(gè)波蘭人租下的房間里有兩張床，我可以睡那張空床。樓上有兩個(gè)房間，她的兩個(gè)兒子住一間，她住另一間。她領(lǐng)我看的那個(gè)房間在樓下，可能以前是做客廳用的。我倒是想單獨(dú)住一個(gè)房間，但又覺得還是別多事得好。外邊毛毛細(xì)雨下個(gè)不停，雨勢有所加大，而我已全身濕透。我不愿再到別處找房子，把自己澆成個(gè)落湯雞。所以我說挺合適的，便住了下來。他們把廚房當(dāng)作客廳使用，里邊放著兩把搖搖晃晃的扶手椅。院子里有個(gè)貯煤室，也兼作浴室用。她的兩個(gè)兒子和那個(gè)波蘭人把午飯帶到上班的地方吃，她要我中午跟她一道吃飯。吃過飯，我坐在廚房里抽煙，她則忙家務(wù)，一邊給我講述她以及她家的情況。到了下班時(shí)間，那幾個(gè)上班族便回來了。波蘭人先回，那兩個(gè)小伙子接踵而至。波蘭人穿過廚房時(shí)，房東太太告訴他，說我要和他睡一個(gè)房間，而他僅僅沖我點(diǎn)了點(diǎn)頭，什么話也沒說。隨后，他從爐子的鐵架上拎起一只大水壺，到浴室里洗臉去了。兩個(gè)小伙子都身材高挑，盡管臉上有煤污，看上去仍一表人才。他們似乎對(duì)我很友好。當(dāng)?shù)弥沂莻€(gè)美國人時(shí)，便把我視為怪物。他們倆一個(gè)十九歲，退伍還鄉(xiāng)才幾個(gè)月，另一個(gè)十八歲。

“The Pole came back and then they went to clean up. The Pole had one of those difficult Polish names, but they called him Kosti.He was a big fellow, two or three inches taller than me, and heavily built.He had a pale fleshy face with a broad short nose and a big mouth.His eyes were blue and because he hadn't been able to wash the coal dust off his eyebrows and eyelashes he looked as if he was made up.The black lashes made the blue of his eyes almost startling.He was an ugly, uncouth fellow.The two boys after they'd changed their clothes went out.The Pole sat on in the kitchen, smoking a pipe and reading the paper.I had a book in my pocket, so I took it out and began reading too.I noticed that he glanced at me once or twice and presently he put his paper down.
波蘭人洗完回來，兩個(gè)小伙子就去浴室了。波蘭人的名字屬于很難叫出口的那一類，大伙兒都簡單地叫他考斯迪。他是個(gè)大塊頭，比我要高出兩三英寸，虎背熊腰，臉上蒼白、多肉，鼻子短而寬，大嘴巴。他的眼睛是藍(lán)顏色的，由于沒有能把眉毛和睫毛上面的煤灰洗掉，看上去就像描了眉一樣。由于睫毛特別黑，就把他的眼睛襯托得藍(lán)得驚人。這家伙長相丑陋，為人有點(diǎn)粗野。那兩個(gè)小伙子洗完，換了身衣服就出去了。波蘭人坐在廚房里一邊抽煙斗一邊看報(bào)。我口袋里有本書，于是拿出來，也開始看起來。我留意到，他瞥過我一兩眼。過了沒多久，他放下了手中的報(bào)紙。

“‘What are you reading?'he asked.
‘你在看什么書？’他問。

“I handed him the book to see for himself. It was a copy of the Princesse de Clèves that I’d bought at the station in Paris because it was small enough to put in my pocket.He looked at it, then at me, curiously, and handed it back.I noticed an ironical smile on his lips.
我把書遞給他，讓他自己看。那是一本《克里夫斯公主》，我在巴黎火車站買的，小版本的，可以放在口袋里。他看看書，又看看我，一副詫異的樣子，隨后把書還給了我。我注意到他的嘴角浮現(xiàn)出一絲嘲諷的微笑。

“‘Does it amuse you?'
‘有意思嗎？’

“‘I think it's very interesting-even absorbing.'
‘我覺得非常有意思，甚至可以說是引人入勝?！?/p>

“‘I read it at school at Warsaw. It bored me stiff.'He spoke very good French, with hardly a trace of Polish accent.‘Now I don't read anything but the newspaper and detective stories.'
‘我在華沙上中學(xué)時(shí)讀過此書。我覺得味如嚼蠟?！姆ㄕZ講得很好，一點(diǎn)波蘭口音也沒有，‘現(xiàn)在我除了報(bào)紙和偵探小說外，什么都不看?！?/p>

“Madame Leclerc, that was our old girl's name, with an eye on the soup that was cooking for supper, sat at the table darning socks. She told Kosti that I had been sent to her by the manager of the mine and repeated what else I had seen fit to tell her.He listened, puffing away at his pipe, and looked at me with brilliantly blue eyes.They were hard and shrewd.He asked me a few questions about myself.When I told him I had never worked in a mine before his lips broke again into an ironical smile.
勒克萊爾太太（這是我們房東太太的名字）一邊留意著爐子上為晚飯煮的湯，一邊坐在桌旁補(bǔ)襪子。她告訴考斯迪，說我是煤礦經(jīng)理介紹來的，把我對(duì)她講過的一席話重復(fù)了一遍。波蘭人聽著，抽著煙斗，用湛藍(lán)湛藍(lán)的眼睛打量著我。那雙眼嚴(yán)苛、精明。他問了我?guī)讉€(gè)問題。當(dāng)我告訴他，說我從來沒有在煤礦上干過時(shí)，他的嘴角又浮現(xiàn)出了嘲諷的微笑。

“‘You don't know what you're in for. No one would go to work in a mine who could do anything else.But that's your affair and doubtless you have your reasons.Where did you live in Paris?'
‘你都不知道自己在做什么。只要有別的路可走，誰都不愿當(dāng)?shù)V工的。不過，這是你的事情，你肯定有自己的原因。你在巴黎住在哪里？’

“I told him.
我如實(shí)做了回答。

“‘At one time I used to go to Paris every year, but I kept to the Grands Boulevards. Have you ever been to Larue's?It was my favourite restaurant.'
‘有一個(gè)時(shí)期，我每年都要去巴黎走一走，不過，都是在大街上逛悠。你去拉魯埃餐館吃過飯嗎？那是我最喜歡去的館子?！?/p>

“That surprised me a bit because, you know, it's not cheap.”
“我聽了覺得有點(diǎn)奇怪，因?yàn)槟羌也宛^的飯菜并不便宜?！?/p>

“Far from it.”
“一點(diǎn)都不便宜?！?/p>

“I fancy he saw my surprise, for he gave me once more his mocking smile, but evidently didn't think it necessary to explain further. We went on talking in a desultory fashion and then the two boys came in.We had supper and when we'd finished Kosti asked me if I'd like to come to the bistro with him and have a beer.It was just a rather large room with a bar at one end of it and a number of marble-topped tables with wooden chairs around them.There was a mechanical piano and someone had put a coin in the slot and it was braying out a dance tune.Only three tables were occupied besides ours.Kosti asked me if I played belote.I'd learnt it with some of my student friends, so I said I did and he proposed that we should play for the beer.I agreed and he called for cards.I lost a beer and a second beer.Then he proposed that we should play for money.He had good cards and I had bad luck.We were playing for very small stakes, but I lost several francs.This and the beer put him in a good humour and he talked.It didn't take me long to guess both by his way of expressing himself and by his manners, that he was a man of education.When he spoke again of Paris it was to ask me if I knew So-and-so and So-and-so, American women I had met at Elliott’s when Aunt Louisa and Isabel were staying with him.He appeared to know them better than I did and I wondered how it was that he found himself in his present position.It wasn’t late, but we had to get up at the crack of dawn.
他可能看明白了我的心思，因?yàn)樗淖旖怯指‖F(xiàn)出了那種嘲諷的微笑。不過，他顯然覺得沒必要做進(jìn)一步的解釋。我們東一搭西一搭地扯些咸淡話，直至兩個(gè)小伙子回來。隨后，大家在一起吃晚飯。飯畢，考斯迪問我愿不愿到小酒館喝一杯。小酒館設(shè)在一個(gè)非常大的房間里，有個(gè)吧臺(tái)在房間的一端，屋里擺著幾張大理石面桌子，每張桌子旁放幾把木椅。酒館里配有一架自動(dòng)鋼琴，有人往投幣孔里塞了一枚硬幣，此時(shí)鋼琴正在彈奏一首舞曲。除掉我們坐的那張桌子外，只有三張桌子旁坐有人?？妓沟蠁栁視?huì)不會(huì)玩勃洛特牌戲。我曾經(jīng)跟我的同學(xué)學(xué)過這種游戲，于是便說自己會(huì)玩。他建議我們賭一把，以啤酒為賭注。我同意后，他叫人把紙牌拿了來。我連著輸了兩局。這時(shí)，他提議我們賭錢。他拿的牌好，而我的運(yùn)氣很糟。我們賭的是小錢，但最終我還是輸?shù)袅撕脦追ɡ?。贏了錢，再加上啤酒助興，他心情很好，打開了話匣子。不一會(huì)兒工夫，我就從他的談吐和行為方式看出他是個(gè)受過教育的人。當(dāng)他重又談到巴黎時(shí)，他就問我認(rèn)不認(rèn)識(shí)某某人和某某人。他說的是幾個(gè)美國女人，路易莎伯母和伊莎貝爾住在艾略特家里時(shí)，我曾在那兒碰見過。他好像比我跟那些人熟悉得多。我不明白他為什么落到了今天這個(gè)地步。此時(shí)天色并不算晚，但我們次日天一破曉就得起床呢。

“‘Let's have one more beer before we go，'said Kosti.
‘走之前，咱們?cè)俸纫槐伞！妓沟险f。

“He sipped it and peered at me with his shrewd little eyes. I knew what he reminded me of then, an ill-tempered pig.
他一面呷著啤酒，一面用他那精明的小眼睛瞅著我。他那樣子使我聯(lián)想到了肥豬，一頭脾氣暴躁的肥豬。

“‘Why have you come here to work in this rotten mine?'he asked me.
‘你為什么跑到這個(gè)爛煤礦受苦？’他問我。

“‘For the experience.'
‘為了體驗(yàn)生活?！?/p>

“‘Tu es fou, mon petit，'he said.
‘你是昏了頭了，小伙子?！f。

“‘And why are you working in it?'
‘那你為什么來呢？’

“He shrugged his massive, ungainly shoulders.
他聳了聳他那厚實(shí)、笨拙的肩膀。

“‘I entered the nobleman's cadet school when I was a kid, my father was a general under the Czar and I was a cavalry officer in the last war. I couldn't stand Pilsudski.We arranged to kill him, but someone gave us away.He shot those of us he caught.I managed to get across the frontier just in time.There was nothing for me but the Foreign Legion or a coal mine.I chose the lesser of two evils.'
‘我小的時(shí)候便進(jìn)了少年軍事學(xué)校。我父親是沙皇麾下的一個(gè)將軍。在上次大戰(zhàn)中，我是一名騎兵軍官。我無法忍受皮爾蘇茨基，我們策劃殺死他，卻被人出賣了。凡是被捕的，都叫他槍決了。我僥幸逃過了邊境。當(dāng)時(shí)擺在我面前的只有兩條路：加入法國的外籍軍團(tuán)或者下井挖煤。我選擇了后一種罪惡感比較輕的出路?！?/p>

“I had already told Kosti what job I was to have in the mine and he had said nothing, but now, putting his elbow on the marble-topped table, he said：“‘Try to push my hand back.'
之前，我已經(jīng)告訴過考斯迪我預(yù)備在煤礦上做什么工作，他當(dāng)時(shí)沒有說什么，這時(shí)卻見他將胳膊肘在大理石桌面上一架，說道：‘來，試試把我的手掰下去?！?/p>

“I knew the old trial of strength and I put my open palm against his. He laughed.‘Your hand won't be as soft asthat in a few weeks.'I pushed with all my might, but I could make no effect against his huge strength and gradually he pressed my hand back and down to the table.
我懂得這是一種老式的角力，于是攤開手，跟他的手握在了一起。他哈哈一笑說：‘用不了幾個(gè)星期，你的手就不會(huì)這么柔軟了?！沂钩龀阅痰臍饬Π阉氖殖掳?，可抵不住他的神力。漸漸地，他將我的手朝下壓，最終壓到了桌面上。

“‘You're pretty strong，'he was good enough to say.‘There aren't many men who keep up as long as that. Listen, my helper's no good, he's a puny little Frenchman, he hasn’t got the strength of a louse.You come along with me tomorrow and I’ll get the foreman to let me have you instead.’
‘你真有勁?！忻伤@么夸獎(jiǎng)我，‘能堅(jiān)持這么長時(shí)間的人是不多的。你聽我說，我的助手屁用都不頂，是個(gè)三寸丁的法國人，手無縛雞之力。不如你明天跟我走，我跟工頭說叫你做我的助手。’

“‘I'd like that，'I said.‘D'you think he'll do it?'
‘我愿意跟你去?！艺f，‘你看工頭會(huì)同意嗎？’

“‘For a consideration. Have you got fifty francs to spare?'
‘這得有見面禮。你拿得出五十個(gè)法郎嗎？’

“He stretched out his hand and I took a note out of my wallet. We went home and to bed.I'd had a long day and I slept like a log.”
“他說完把手伸出來，我從錢包里掏出一張五十法郎的鈔票遞給他。之后我們便回去睡覺。那一天真夠累的，我一躺下便睡得像死豬?！?/p>

“Didn't you find the work terribly hard?”I asked Larry.
“你是不是發(fā)現(xiàn)挖煤的活十分艱辛？”我問拉里。

“Back-breaking at first，”he grinned.“Kosti worked it with the foreman and I was made his helper. At that time Kosti was working in a space about the size of a hotel bathroom and one got to it through a tunnel so low that you had to crawl through it on your hands and knees.It was as hot as hell in there and we worked in nothing but our pants.There was something terribly repulsive in that great white fat torso of Kosti's；he looked like a huge slug.The row of the pneumatic cutter in that narrow space was deafening.My job was to gather the blocks of coal that he hacked away and load a basket with them and drag the basket through the tunnel to its mouth, where it could be loaded into a truck when the train came along at intervals on its way to the elevators.It's the only coal mine I've ever known, so I don't know if that's the normal practice.It seemed amateurish to me and it was damned hard work.At half time we knocked off for a rest and ate our lunch and smoked.I wasn’t sorry when we were through for the day, and gosh, it was good to have a bath.I thought I’d never get my feet clean；they were as black as ink.Of course my hands blistered and they got as sore as the devil, but they healed.I got used to the work.”
“起初，累得人腰酸背痛?！彼珠_嘴笑了笑說，“考斯迪打通了工頭的關(guān)系，讓我當(dāng)上了他的助手。那時(shí)，他在一塊旅館浴室那么大的空間里干活，進(jìn)去時(shí)得手腳并用爬過一條非常低的隧道。里面熱得像火爐，干活時(shí)渾身脫得精光，只穿一條褲子。考斯迪的身子又白又胖，活像一條巨無霸鼻涕蟲，看了叫人心生厭惡。在那巴掌大的地方，氣動(dòng)挖煤機(jī)發(fā)出的聲音震耳欲聾。我的任務(wù)是把他切下來的煤塊裝進(jìn)一個(gè)筐子，再拖著筐子爬過隧道，將其拖到隧道口。隔一段時(shí)間就有一輛運(yùn)煤車開過來，煤塊便被裝進(jìn)車斗，然后運(yùn)往電梯那兒。這是我平生第一次下井，不知道這流程是否規(guī)范，只覺得不太專業(yè)化，簡直是牛馬干的活。中途，我們停下手休息——吃午飯和抽煙。一天干下來，我的感覺并不糟糕，再洗個(gè)澡，舒服極了。我當(dāng)時(shí)覺得自己的腳恐怕永遠(yuǎn)也別想洗干凈了——那雙腳黑得像煤炭。我的手磨出了水泡，疼得像刀割，但后來都長好了。漸漸地，挖煤的活我就干慣了?！?/p>

“How long did you stick it out?”
“你堅(jiān)持了多長時(shí)間？”

“I was only kept on that job for a few weeks. The trucks that carried the coal to the elevators were hauled by a tractor and the driver was a poor mechanic and the engine was always breaking down.Once he couldn't get it going and he didn't seem to know what to do.Well, I'm a pretty good mechanic, so I had a look at it and in half an hour I got it working.The foreman told the manager and he sent for me and asked me if I knew about cars.The result was that he gave me the mechanic's job；of course it was monotonous, but it was easy, and because they didn't have any more engine trouble they were pleased with me.
當(dāng)助手的活我只干了幾個(gè)星期。話說那些往電梯口運(yùn)煤的車，它們是靠一輛拖拉機(jī)拖拽的。拖拉機(jī)駕駛員只會(huì)開，不懂機(jī)械，而拖拉機(jī)的引擎經(jīng)常出毛病。有一次出毛病，他修理不好，一時(shí)不知所措。我可是個(gè)呱呱叫的機(jī)修工，幫他瞧了瞧，沒過半個(gè)小時(shí)便排除了故障。工頭將此事告訴了經(jīng)理，經(jīng)理把我找了去，問我懂不懂汽車。結(jié)果呢，他給了我一份機(jī)修工的工作。當(dāng)然，那工作單調(diào)乏味，可我干起來得心應(yīng)手。由于汽車一有故障就被排除，他們對(duì)我很是滿意。

“Kosti was as sore as hell at my leaving him. I suited him and he'd got used to me.I got to know him pretty well, working with him all day, going to the bistro with him after supper, and sharing a room with him.He was a funny fellow.He was the sort of man who'd have appealed to you.He didn't mix with the Poles and we didn't go to the cafés they went to.He couldn’t forget he was a nobleman and had been a cavalry officer and he treated them like dirt.Naturally they resented it, but they couldn’t do anything about it；he was as strong as an ox, and if it had ever come to a scrap, knives or no knives, he’d have been a match for half a dozen of them together.I got to know some of them all the same, and they told me he’d been a cavalry officer all right in one of the smart regiments, but it was a lie about his having left Poland for political reasons.He’d been kicked out of the Officers’Club at Warsaw and cashiered because he’d been caught cheating at cards.They warned me against playing with him.They said that was why he fought shy of them, because they knew too much about him and wouldn’t play with him.
我離開了考斯迪，這叫他窩了一肚子的火。我們倆配合默契，已彼此適應(yīng)。成天跟他一起干活，晚飯后一起下酒館，睡覺時(shí)分享一個(gè)房間，我把他已摸得透透的。他是個(gè)古怪的人，叫你一見就會(huì)留下印象。他不跟波蘭人來往，波蘭人去的咖啡館我們就不去。他總忘記不了自己是貴族，而且當(dāng)過騎兵軍官，所以，他把那些波蘭人都看得糞土不如。那些波蘭人當(dāng)然氣得不得了，可又奈何不了他——他壯得像頭牛，打起架來，不管用不用刀子，五六個(gè)人近不了他的身。盡管如此，我還是結(jié)識(shí)了幾個(gè)波蘭人。他們告訴我，說他在一個(gè)很棒的騎兵分隊(duì)里當(dāng)過軍官是真的，但至于說他是出于政治原因被迫離開了波蘭，那是一派胡言——他是被華沙軍官俱樂部開除了，并解除了他的軍職，理由是他打牌時(shí)抽老千，叫人抓了個(gè)正著。他們警告我不要跟他打牌，說他老躲著他們是因?yàn)樗麄冎浪牡准?xì)，不愿跟他在一起待。

“I'd been losing to him consistently, not much, you know, just a few francs a night, but when he won he always insisted on paying for drinks, so it didn't amount to anything really. I thought I was just having a run of bad luck or that I didn't play as well as he did.But after that I kept my eyes skinned and I was dead sure he was cheating, but d'you know, for the life of me I couldn't see how he did it.Gosh, he was clever.I knew he simply couldn’t have the best cards all the time.I watched him like a lynx.He was as cunning as a fox and I guess he saw I’d been put wise to him.One night, after we’d been playing for a while, he looked at me with that rather cruel, sarcastic smile of his which was the only way he knew how to smile, and said：“‘Shall I show you a few tricks?'
我和他打牌老輸，但每次輸?shù)貌欢?，只不過區(qū)區(qū)幾個(gè)法郎，而且他總是爭著付酒錢，所以實(shí)際上也就算不了什么。我以為自己僅僅是手氣不好罷了，或者說自己的牌技不如他?？墒?，了解了內(nèi)幕后，我就擦亮眼睛注意觀察，百分之百地肯定他在抽老千?？墒?，即便要了我的命，我也看不出他是怎么搗的鬼。啊，他可真是聰明到家了。我明明知道他不可能老拿到最好的牌，卻苦于抓不著把柄。我像猞猁一樣緊盯著他不放，而他似狐貍一般狡猾。他可能發(fā)現(xiàn)我在提防著他了。一天晚上，我們玩了一會(huì)兒牌之后，他看著我，臉上浮現(xiàn)出那種無情、嘲諷的微笑（他只會(huì)這種笑法），款款說道：‘想不想讓我給你變幾個(gè)戲法看？’

“He took the pack of cards and asked me to name one. He shuffled them and he told me to choose one；I did, and it was the card I'd named.He did two or three more tricks and then he asked me if I played poker.I said I did and he dealt me a hand.When I looked at it I saw I'd got four aces and a king.
他把紙牌拿過去，讓我說一張牌，然后洗了牌，叫我隨便取一張。我取出一張看了看，發(fā)現(xiàn)正是我方才說的那張。他又變了兩個(gè)戲法，然后問我會(huì)不會(huì)玩撲克游戲，我說會(huì)玩。于是他就給我發(fā)了幾張牌。我看了看，發(fā)現(xiàn)手里拿的是四張A和一張老K。

“‘You'd be willing to bet a good deal on that hand, wouldn't you?'he asked.
‘愿意不愿意給你手里的牌下一筆大賭注？’

“‘My whole stack，'I answered.
‘我愿意把所有的錢都押上。’我回答說。

“‘You'd be silly.'He put down the hand he'd dealt himself. It was a straight flush.How it was done I don't know.He laughed at my amazement.‘If I weren't an honest man I’d have had your shirt by now.’
‘那你就傻了?！f完把手里的牌攤在了桌子上——原來是一把同花順。這叫我一頭霧水。他見我一臉的詫異，不由哈哈大笑起來，說道：‘假如我不是個(gè)規(guī)矩人，我會(huì)叫你把身上的衣服都輸?shù)舻摹！?/p>

“‘You haven't done so badly as it is，'I grinned.
‘現(xiàn)在你把我贏得也夠慘的了?！倚χf。

“‘Chicken feed. Not enough to buy a dinner at Larue's.'
‘一點(diǎn)小錢，連去拉魯埃餐館打打牙祭都不夠?！?/p>

“We continued to play pretty well every night. I came to the conclusion that he cheated not so much for the money as for the fun of it.It gave him a queer satisfaction to know that he was making a fool of me, and I think he got a lot of amusement out of knowing that I was on to what he was doing and couldn't see how it was done.
我們每晚仍繼續(xù)打牌，而且興致很高。我得出的結(jié)論是，他抽老千與其說是為了贏錢，還不如說是為了尋樂子。他對(duì)自己能夠愚弄我而感到一種異樣的滿足。也許最叫他感到高興的是：我明明知道他在搗鬼，卻弄不清他是怎么搗的。

“But that was only one side of him and it was the other side that made him so interesting to me. I couldn't reconcile the two.Though he boasted he never read anything but the paper and detective stories he was a cultivated man.He was a good talker, caustic, harsh, cynical, but it was exhilarating to listen to him.He was a devout Catholic and had a crucifix hanging over his bed, and he went to Mass every Sunday regularly.On Saturday nights he used to get drunk.The bistro we went to was crammed jammed full then, and the air was heavy with smoke.There were quiet, middle-aged miners with their families, and there were groups of young fellows kicking up a hell of a row, and there were men with sweaty faces round tables playing belote with loud shouts, while their wives sat by, a little behind them, and watched.The crowd and the noise had a strange effect on Kosti and he'd grow serious and start talking-of all unlikely subjects-of mysticism.I knew nothing of it then but an essay of Maeterlinck's on Ruysbroek that I'd read in Paris.But Kosti talked of Plotinus and Denis the Areopagite and Jacob Boehme the shoemaker and Meister Eckhart.It was fantastic to hear that great hulking bum, who'd been thrown out of his own world, that sardonic, bitter down-and-out, speaking of the ultimate reality of things and the blessedness of union with God.It was all new to me and I was confused and excited.I was like someone who’s lain awake in a darkened room and suddenly a chink of light shoots through the curtains and he knows he only has to draw them and there the country will be spread before him in the glory of the dawn.But if I tried to get him on the subject when he was sober he got mad at me.His eyes were spiteful.
不過，這只是他的一個(gè)方面，而使我最感興趣的卻是他的另一方面。我簡直無法把這兩方面調(diào)和起來。雖則他自夸除掉報(bào)紙和偵探小說以外，什么都不看，但其實(shí)他是個(gè)有學(xué)問的人。他很健談，語言犀利、刻薄，夾槍帶棒的，然而卻讓聽者興奮不已。他是個(gè)虔誠的天主教徒，床頭掛一個(gè)十字架，每逢星期天就去做彌撒。星期六的晚上則以酒為伴。我們?nèi)サ哪莻€(gè)酒館一到星期六便顧客盈門，屋里空氣混濁，煙霧繚繞?？腿酥杏袛y家人而至的沉默寡言的中年礦工，有結(jié)伙而來的喧鬧不已的年輕人；一些酒客圍在桌旁玩勃洛特牌戲，臉上淌著汗，嘴里大聲吆喝著，他們的賢內(nèi)助則坐在他們身后觀戰(zhàn)。人群和喧鬧聲對(duì)考斯迪會(huì)產(chǎn)生奇特的影響，使他變得深沉。這時(shí)的他會(huì)談一些你想不到的話題，會(huì)談神秘主義。至于神秘主義，我在巴黎時(shí)僅僅讀過梅特林克寫的一篇關(guān)于魯斯布魯克的文章，其他便一無所知了。而考斯迪卻大談普羅提諾、古希臘雅典最高法院的法官丹尼斯、鞋匠雅各布·貝姆以及邁斯特·?？思{特。聽這樣一個(gè)被自己的社會(huì)圈子驅(qū)逐出來的大塊頭游民，一個(gè)憤世嫉俗、牢騷滿腹、窮困潦倒的人，大談什么萬物的本質(zhì)以及和上帝合為一體的極樂境界，簡直是匪夷所思。這些情況我聞所未聞，讓我感到迷茫，也感到激動(dòng)。我就像一個(gè)躺在黑屋子里的人，窗簾的縫隙透進(jìn)一線光亮，心里知道只要拉開窗簾，眼前就會(huì)出現(xiàn)一片沐浴在燦爛曙光里的原野。不過，在沒有喝醉酒的情況下，你再跟他扯這個(gè)話題，他會(huì)生氣的，眼睛露出惡狠狠的光。

“‘How should I know what I was talking about when I didn't know what I was saying?'he snapped.
‘我都不知道自己說了些啥，怎么能給你講呢？’他會(huì)板著臉說。

“But I knew he was lying. He knew perfectly well what he was talking about.He knew a lot.Of course he was soused, but the look in his eyes, the rapt expression on his ugly face, weren't due only to drink.There was more to it than that.The first time he talked in that way he said something that I've never forgotten, because it horrified me；he said that the world isn't a creation, for out of nothing nothing comes；but a manifestation of the eternal nature；well, that was all right, but then he added that evil is as direct a manifestation of the divine as good.They were strange words to hear in that sordid, noisy café，to the accompaniment of dance tunes on the mechanical piano.”
“可我知道他在睜著眼說瞎話。他完全清楚自己說的是什么。他的知識(shí)非常淵博。他當(dāng)時(shí)喝醉了酒固然不錯(cuò)，但他的眼神以及那張丑臉上激昂的表情，就不能僅僅用一句喝醉了的話搪塞過去的。情況并非如此簡單。他第一次跟我那般說話，其話語我一直都沒有忘掉，因?yàn)槲耶?dāng)時(shí)都驚呆了。他竟然說這個(gè)世界并非上帝所創(chuàng)造，說無中不能生有，而是一種永恒的存在。這還罷了，他竟然又說惡和善一樣，都直接反映著上天的意志。酒館里骯臟不堪、人聲喧嘩，再加上那架自動(dòng)鋼琴彈奏著舞曲，他的話在這種環(huán)境中聽上去怪兮兮的。”