生活大爆炸第七季:第9集:弄假成真的婚姻(下)
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Oh! How do you not make a first down there?
噢!你在那兒首攻怎么會不成功呢?
They passed against a nickel defense. They should have run it off-tackle.
他們過了個五防守陣型，他們應該跑躲避攔截的路線
How the hell do you know that?
你怎么知道這個的?
My father loved football.
我爸以前喜歡橄欖球
He always made me watch it before I was allowed to do my homework.
他總逼我看，沒看完之前我不許做作業(yè)
Well, you'll be happy to know I just spoke to Zack and he's willing to sign the court papers.
現在你會很樂意知道我剛剛和扎克通過電話，他說他愿意在法庭文件上簽字
He's on his way here now.
他就在來的路上了
Wait, you invited him here? Yeah.
等等，你邀請他來這兒了? 對啊
I'm getting ready to weigh in again. Come on.
我又準備好發(fā)表意見了。來這邊吧
What do you think they ought to do now?
你覺得他們現在該怎么做?
I would throw a quick slant to a wideout, given that the defense is showing blitz.
如果是我會做個迅速斜線進攻扔個一個邊線，鑒于防守呈現閃電戰(zhàn)局面
Oh, I love a good blitz, especially with sour cream.
噢，我超愛絕佳閃電戰(zhàn)，尤其是有酸奶油的
Get it? 'Cause it sounds like "blintz."
沒聽懂嗎?因為這聽著像"薄餅卷"啊
Did someone say "blintz"?!
有人說薄餅卷嗎?
I just don't understand why you invited him here today.
我就是不明白，你今天為什么邀請他來
Because you wouldn't shut up about it.
因為你就是咬著不放
When I called him, he had nothing to do, so I just thought it would... Hey, guys, I'm trying to cook in here.
我打給他的時候，他沒事可做，所以我想著...嘿，我在這兒做飯呢
Oh, sorry. We'll keep it down.
噢，對不起，我們會小點聲的
No, no, speak up.
不不不，大點兒聲
I'm about to use the blender, and I don't want to miss anything.
我馬上要用攪拌機了，我可不想錯過任何事情
Well, you might have to cook for one more because she invited Zack.
好吧，你可能得再做多一人份了，因為她邀請了扎克來
What? Ooh! My, my. The plot, like my gravy, thickens.
神馬? 噢天啊!嘖嘖嘖，劇情如我的肉汁，愈發(fā)香濃呢
I don't care for your mother's bathroom.
我不喜歡你母親的衛(wèi)生間
There's not an angle to do one's business without a clown figurine staring at you.
沒有一個角度可以解決私人問題，而不被一個小丑雕像盯著的
That's why I sit.
這就是我坐著的原因
Yeah, that's why.
對，原因是這個
You remember the Thanksgiving game when it snowed in Dallas?
你記得那場感恩節(jié)時的比賽嗎，達拉斯州下雪的時候
1993-Leon Lett blew the game in the final seconds and the Dolphins emerged victorious.
1993年，Leon Lett在最后一秒毀了比賽，然后Dolphins獲勝了
Then I finally got to do my calculus.
而我終于可以做微積分去了
I was so pissed, I wanted to shoot my TV.
我當時氣得想一槍射了我的電視
So was my dad.
我爸也是
And then he did.
而且他也那么做了
Anyone need a beer? Yeah. Thank God.
有人要喝啤酒嗎?好的。謝謝老天爺
So, does your dad still live in Texas?
那么，你爸爸還住在德克薩斯州嗎?
No. He died when I was 14.
不，他在我14歲時去世了
I'm sorry to hear that.
聽到這個真難過
So was the man who owned the local liquor store.
當地小酒館的老板也很難過
He cried and cried.
他哭了一遍又一遍
Here you go. Oh, thanks.
給，哦謝謝
So, if your dad died when you were 14, you were never old enough to have a beer with the man.
這么說，如果你父親在你14歲時過世了，你年齡還從未大到可以和他喝啤酒
No, sir. He did try to give me one for my high school graduation, but I was 11 and my mom said no.
是的。他確實試圖在我高中畢業(yè)時給我一瓶，但我才11歲，我媽說不行
Well, you're having one with me.
好吧，你來跟我一起喝一罐吧
All right. To your dad.
好吧。敬你的父親
I never had a beer with my dad, either.
我也從未和我爸喝過啤酒
Do you mind? We're having a moment here.
不好意思，我們在這共度時光呢
I can't believe Penny's married to Zack.
難以置信佩妮已經嫁給扎克了
Wonder what she saw in that guy.
不知道她看上那小子什么了。
I don't know. He's sweet, he's tall, handsome.
我不知道，他又溫柔，又高，又帥
Broad shoulders, good hair.
寬厚的肩膀，漂亮的頭發(fā)
Hmm. Wonder what she sees in Leonard.
嗯，不知道他看上萊納德什么了
How's it going out there?
外面怎么樣?
Sheldon and your dad are bonding and completely ignoring me.
謝爾頓在和你爸聯絡感情，我被完全忽視
I know how you feel.
我了解你的感受
Sheldon ignored me for a week when he got that Roomba vacuum.
謝爾頓有Roomba自動吸塵器的時候，忽視了我一周
I kick it when he's not looking.
我會趁他不注意的時候踢它
What are they doing?
他們在干嘛?
They're drinking beer and watching football. So why don't you do that with them?
喝啤酒看橄欖球， 那你怎么不一塊兒?
They don't want me.
他們不想讓我一起
What do you mean?
這是什么意思?
Well, Sheldon started talking about how his dad isn't alive anymore, and they were toasting, and I tried to tell them about how sad I was when my dad abandoned...Zack's here!
謝爾頓說起他爸爸已經不在了，然后他們就開始祝酒，我也試著去告訴他們，他爸拋棄我時有多難過...扎克到了!
Stir the gravy.
攪拌肉汁
Sorry. I really want to hear how sad you are. I'll be back in like five, ten minutes.
抱歉，我真的想聽你有多難過，我會在五到十分鐘后回來
Sorry she made you come over here on a holiday.
抱歉她讓你在節(jié)日里跑一趟
It's all right. I didn't have anything going on.
沒什么，我反正也沒在做什么
Plus, Penny told me we're married, and Thanksgiving's a time to be with family.
再說佩妮告訴我，我們結婚了，感恩節(jié)就是親人團聚的日子嘛
Yeah, okay, great. Can we just get this over with?
行行。那就趕緊簽了吧?
Yeah, uh, you guys have to sign here and here.
好，你們要在這里...還有這里簽名
On Monday, we'll file for the annulment, and this "marriage" will be over.
周一就可以申請廢除婚姻，然后這場"婚姻"就結束了
Okay. I don't know if I want to sign it. Ooh. Ooh. Ooh.
簽好了，我還沒想好要不要簽。唔? 唔。
Why won't you sign it?
為什么你不想簽?
I just think splitting up can be rough on kids.
我只是覺得離婚了，孩子們不好過啊
We don't have any kids.
我們又沒小孩
Are you sure? 'Cause you didn't know we were married until this morning.
你確定嗎?因為你也是今天早上才知道我們結婚了
Okay, look, Zack, come on. You know neither of us thought this was real. I mean, we were married by an Elvis impersonator.
扎克你聽我說，你清楚我們倆誰也沒以為那是真的啊，我們的證婚人還是貓王模仿達人啊
Of course it was an impersonator.
當然是找模仿達人啦
We could never afford a real Elvis.
我們哪有錢請貓王本人啊
You married him instead of me?
你嫁給他，而不嫁我?
Good call.
有眼光
Sign the papers. Hang on. You know what? You have been a jerk about this all day.
快簽，等下，你知道嗎?你一天都因為這事咄咄逼人
You always do this... whenever I mess up, you're right there to make me feel even worse about it.
你老是這樣...我每次搞砸什么事，你就不遺余力地讓我感覺更糟
That is not true. Yeah, we could've waited till Monday, signed the papers, this all would have been over.
才不是呢，是嗎，我們明明可以等到周一，直接簽字，這件事就可以結束了啊
You're the one who invited him here. Oh, there you go again... just another mistake you're throwing in my face. Not cool, bro.
是你請他過來的，又來啦...又一個推卸到我身上的錯誤。這可不對哦，兄弟
I'm starting to think you're not the kind of guy I want dating my wife.
我開始覺得我不喜歡你這樣的人和我老婆約會
Yeah, well, she's not gonna be your wife for long.
那個...她很快就不是你老婆了
Oh, no. Are you dying?
不是吧，你快死了嗎?
I'm about to. Sign the paper.
快了...簽字吧
Know what they say: "Happy wife, happy life." Let's eat.
俗話說得好，媳婦開心，夫復何求。開飯吧
Two, three, eight, four, six.
二，三，八，四，六
That's all I can do without throwing up.
我只能做到這里了，不然就吐了
That is not what I expected when you said you were gonna burp "pie."
你說你要打嗝打出個“派”的時候我可沒想到是這樣的
Did somebody say "pie"?!
是不是有人說要"派"呀?!
I don't know what's scarier: the bathroom clowns or the woman that put them there.
我都說不清以下哪樣更恐怖:浴室小丑呢，還是把小丑放在浴室的女人
All I know is you can only fit one of her in a car.
我只知道你只能把一個她放到車里去
And there's the clown that came out of her.
這就是她生出來的那個小丑
I really didn't want to come here, but this is shaping up to be one of the best Thanksgivings I've had in a long time. Me, too.
我本來挺不想來的，但是這馬上就要變成多年來我過的最棒的感恩節(jié)了。我也是
Hey. Howie says you've been making fun of him all day!
嘿， 華仔說你們一整天都在拿他開涮
Now, both of you apologize right now!
你們倆現在就向他道歉，現在!
She's so tiny.
她好迷你啊
It's funny when she's mad.
她發(fā)飆了好有趣哦
All right, mister, I think you owe Howard and Bernadette an apology.
好了，這位先生，我覺得你欠霍華德和伯納黛特一個道歉
Perhaps you're right.
你說得對
I'm sorry for my behavior.
我對我的所作所為感到抱歉
I've had alcohol, and it's caused me to be inappropriate.
我喝了點酒，導致我行為不端
It's okay. Don't worry about it. Thank you.
沒事，別放心上。謝謝
Ain't she great? Mmm.
她是不是很棒?是呀
Sheldon. Now, how's about you get us a couple of beers?
謝爾頓別鬧，那去給我們拿點啤酒來吧
Thanks again for cooking.
再次謝謝你下廚掌勺
Yeah, everything was delicious.
是呀，每樣都很好吃
Well, I couldn't have done it without my two favorite girls.
要是沒兩位我最愛的姑娘幫我，我也搞不定
Martha Stewart and Rachael Ray.
瑪莎·斯圖爾特(富商及專欄作家)和蕾切爾·雷(電視烹飪女王)
Hey, Sheldon, what do you say we go outside and throw around the old pigskin?
謝爾頓，我們要不要出去，去玩玩老豬皮(即:橄欖球)?
This is a Jewish house. I don't think they have pigskin.
這是個猶太家庭，我覺得不會有豬皮
Did someone say "pigskin"?
是不是有人說到"豬皮"啦?
Hey, honey, I'm sorry about today.
親愛的，今天的事我很抱歉
And I promise, next time I get married, it won't be a joke.
我向你保證，下次我結婚的時候，不會再當玩笑了
It'll be for love. Or money.
我會為愛而結婚，或者為錢
I'm sorry, too.
我也很抱歉
Don't be. It's my fault.
別內疚，都是我的錯
I was a terrible husband.
我是個糟糕的丈夫
I was never around.
我從來沒好好陪她
I know I'm hard on you, but you're not the worst son-in-law in the world.
我知道我對你很嚴格，但你還不算是世界上最爛的女婿
Mike, that's the nicest thing you've ever said to me. Mike
這是你對我過說的最感人的話了
Well, I'm drunk.
是呀是呀，我喝多了
I just vomited on a lot of clowns.
我剛剛吐了很多小丑一身
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