生活大爆炸第七季:第9集:弄假成真的婚姻(上)
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The math is all there. It's not real. Yes, it is.
我們都算過了，那是不可能的，才不是，是真的!
Yeah... uh, look. It is scientifically impossible for a person to tip a cow.
你看啊，從科學(xué)的角度說，一個人想要把一頭牛絆倒是絕對不可能的
Even you, with your stocky build and lumberjack shoulders, you couldn't do it.
就算是你這種敦實(shí)健壯的女漢子也是不可能的
It's horrible. Why would you push a cow over? They're sacred.
太惡劣了，你們干嘛要把牛推倒?牛是神圣的動物
Oh, stop it. I've seen you eat, like, a million hamburgers.
你還有臉說，你都吃了幾千幾萬個漢堡了(夾著牛肉餅)
Hey, an animal can be both sacred and delicious.
動物可以既神圣又美味的
Look, I'm telling you I've done it, okay? I clearly remember the cow standing up and then the cow on its side.
我不騙你們，我真的干過，我清楚地記得那頭牛先是站著的，后來就倒在了地上
Were you drunk?
你是喝高了吧?
I was 16 in Nebraska. What do you think?
我當(dāng)時(shí)可是16歲的西部牛仔小青年，你覺得呢?
I think you're the one who fell over.
我覺得你才是那個摔倒的
That would explain why the sky was also on its side.
難怪當(dāng)時(shí)天空也是倒著的
Howard. Cow tipping: real or not? Mmm. I'm gonna say... not.
霍華德，推倒一頭牛，你覺得是真的嗎?我覺得應(yīng)該是假的
That's just based on me trying to roll my mom over when she's snoring.
我是根據(jù)在我媽打呼時(shí)我想給她翻個身的經(jīng)歷得出的
Speaking of that big side of beef, uh, she's invited all of you to Thanksgiving at her house.
說到我這個大肉球老媽啊，她邀請你們所有人來她家過感恩節(jié)
You know, I've been told that a bald refusal of an invitation is rude and one must instead offer up a polite excuse, so...
他們告訴我直接拒絕別人的邀請很不禮貌，應(yīng)該給一個客氣的借口，所以...
I'd love to go, but, unfortunately, that sounds awful.
我想去的，但很遺憾，這個主意簡直太可怕了
Come on, it'll be fun.
別這樣嘛，會很好玩的
Uh, we were actually gonna do it here.
其實(shí)我們想在這兒過節(jié)的
Please. Bernadette's bringing her dad 'cause her mom's out of town, and I never have anything to say to that guy.
拜托了，伯納黛特要帶她老爸過來因?yàn)樗龐寢層惺鲁鋈チ?，我跟他完全沒話講啊
Oh, since you put it that way, I'd love to go, but that sounds even more awful.
既然你這么說了，我想去的，但這聽起來更可怕了
It'd actually be nice to not hear Sheldon complain about my cooking all day.
其實(shí)不用聽Sheldon整天跟我抱怨菜很難吃也挺好的
Yo... uh, excuse me, but every year you prepare a terrible meal and every year I criticize it.
容我說一句，每年你都做一桌難吃的菜，每年我都批評你
Do our traditions mean nothing to you?
我們的這個傳統(tǒng)對你來說就一點(diǎn)也不重要嗎?
I want to go. Yeah, me, too.
我想去，我也想去
I'm in. Sheldon?
我也去，謝爾頓你呢?
Ugh, fine, I'll go.
好吧，我會去的
But if her food is delicious, Thanksgiving is ruined, and it's on you.
但是如果她做的菜很好吃，感恩節(jié)就算毀了，而且全都是你的錯
Do we really have to go to Mrs. Wolowitz's house?
我們真的一定要去沃羅威茨夫人家嗎?
We do. And I expect you to be on your best behavior.
當(dāng)然，而且我希望你能表現(xiàn)出最好的一面
Now I know how the African slaves felt.
我現(xiàn)在知道非洲奴隸的心情了
Being dragged from their homes to labor under the yoke of the white man.
從家里被人拖走，在白人的統(tǒng)治下勞動
Are you honestly comparing Thanksgiving dinner at Wolowitz's mom's with one of the greatest tragedies in the history of mankind? Yes.
你真的是要把去沃羅威茨媽媽家吃感恩節(jié)晚餐和人類歷史上最大的悲劇之一相提并論嗎?嗯
Sheldon, you can have a nice Thanksgiving anywhere. I spent one in Vegas.
謝爾頓，不論在哪兒，你都可以過一個開心的感恩節(jié)，我有次就在拉斯維加斯過的
You did? Yeah, back when I was dating Zack.
真的?是啊，我當(dāng)時(shí)還在跟扎克談戀愛
It was actually more fun than I thought.
比我想的要有意思多了
We gambled, we went to one of those cheesy wedding chapels, we had a really good turkey dinner. Which was surprising, since we were at a strip club.
賭賭博呀，逛逛那種山寨的婚禮小教堂呀，那頓火雞晚餐真的很棒，很讓人驚喜，因?yàn)槲覀兪窃诿撘挛枰箍倳缘?/div>
Wait, you went to a chapel?
等等，你們?nèi)チ私烫?
Yeah. Why? We had one of those silly fake weddings.
是呀，怎么了?我們還辦了那種超搞笑的假婚禮
Penny...you know those are real, right?
佩妮……你知道那是真的結(jié)了婚，對吧?
No, they're not.
不，才不是
Yeah, they are.
是真的
No, they're not.
不，才不是
Yeah, they are.
真的是真的
He's right. They're real.
他說得對， 是真的
But it... didn't seem real.
但是，看著不像真的啊
Let me ask you a question.
我來問你一下
At any point, was Las Vegas on its side?
是不是有那么一段時(shí)間，拉斯維加斯是躺著的?
Hi, Dad. Hi, honey.
嗨，老爸。嗨，寶貝
Oh, you brought beer for everybody.
哇，你給大家都帶了啤酒
Uh, okay, yeah, it's for everybody.
好吧，是的，這是給大家喝的
I really just wanted to have a nice, quiet day at home and watch the game.
我本來只是想安安靜靜地在家看球賽的
You can have a quiet day and watch the game here.
在這里也可以安靜地看球賽呀
Howard, the medicine's not working!
霍華德，這藥不管用!
You just took it. At least let it reach your first stomach!
你才剛吃下去，起碼等這藥到你的第一個胃再說吧!
Hey, Mike. Let me help you out, there. Thanks. What's wrong with your mom?
你好呀，邁克。我來幫你拿，謝謝，親家母怎么了?
Oh, her gout's flaring up. Turns out an apple pie a day does not keep the doctor away.
她的痛風(fēng)又發(fā)作了，看來每天一個蘋果派不能讓醫(yī)生遠(yuǎn)離你
How can one little toe hurt so bad?
一個小小的腳指頭怎么能痛成這樣?
Maybe because that little piggy is being crushed by the barn!
可能是因?yàn)槟穷^小豬（腳指頭）正被牲口棚壓著呢!
She should quiet down soon. I gave her enough pain meds to choke a... well, her.
她馬上就能安靜下來了，我給她吃了能把一頭...把她放倒的止痛藥
I guess we're gonna have to do all the cooking.
看來得我們自己來做飯了
I have a better idea.
我有個更好的主意
If you think you're gonna make me do all this by myself, you're crazy. I was gonna make Raj do it all by himself.
如果你想全讓我來做，你腦子就有問題，我是想全讓拉杰來做
Oh, well, that's a great idea.
這個主意超棒
No traffic, we're sailing.
不堵車，真是一帆風(fēng)順呀
Yes. Like we're on a ship.
是啊。我們就好像在船上
Coming from Africa to America.
從非洲到美洲
Sheldon, that's completely inappropriate. You can't keep comparing yourself to a slave.
謝爾頓，這完全不合適，你不能一直把你自己和奴隸相比
Yes, Miss Amy.
是的，艾米小姐
I can't believe you're married to that idiot.
真是難以相信你居然和那個白癡結(jié)婚了
Ugh, would you stop? We just did it as a goof.
能不能別再說了?我們這么做只是玩玩而已
A goof or not, you're actually married. You need to get this taken care of.
不管你們是不是認(rèn)真的，你的確已婚了，你必須把這件事料理好
I will. Why are you making this such a big deal?
我會的，為什么你這么大驚小怪的?
Oh, oh, oh, I have a reason.
哦哦哦，我是有個理由
It could be because you said yes to marrying Zack, but every time Leonard's proposed, he's gotten a resounding no.
也許是因?yàn)槟愫驮私Y(jié)婚了，但是每次萊納德求婚時(shí)，他都會得到一個響亮的"不"
Yeah, that's just off the top of my head.
是啊，這只是我立刻能想到的理由
So how do I undo this?
那么我該如何彌補(bǔ)呢?
I'm hoping you can get an annulment. It's just like it never happened.
我希望你能廢除這個婚姻，就好像從來沒發(fā)生過一樣
Great, well, what do I have to do?
好極了，那么我該怎么做呢?
It says here you can get an annulment if any of the following conditions are met.
上面說以下這些情況滿足的話，你就可以廢除婚姻了
"Were you unable to consummate the marriage?" Penny? Next.
你是否無法完成夫妻生活?哈哈，佩妮?下一條
"Is there any evidence of fraud, bigamy, want of understanding?"
是否有任何欺騙，重婚，或者理解匱乏?
"Want of understanding?" What does that even mean? Ding, ding, ding. We have a winner.
理解匱乏?那是什么意思?叮叮叮，我們找到贏家了
Thanks for saving the day.
感謝今天能來
Ah, no problem.
啊，沒關(guān)系
It wouldn't be Thanksgiving without an Indian providing the food.
如果今天沒有印度人給你們做菜的話，今天就不能算得上感恩節(jié)了
Uh, now, where does your mom keep the Crisco?
唔，你媽媽把油放哪了?
Um, I don't know. Probably in a wad in her cheek.
唔，我不知道。大概在她臉上的一團(tuán)肉里吧
I'll help Raj in here. Why don't you go keep my dad company?
我在這里幫拉杰，你為啥不去陪陪我爸爸呢?
Oh, he doesn't want me in there. I'm the creepy little guy who has sex with his daughter.
他不想我呆在那，我是那個睡了他女兒的變態(tài)的小矮子
Don't be silly, he loves you. Does he?
別傻了，他愛你的，是嗎?
Okay, he cares about you a lot. Really?
好吧，他很關(guān)心你，真的嗎?
I do crap for you all the time. Get out there.
我總是為你擦屁股，滾粗去
So your wife's in Arizona with the grandkids? Uh-huh.
那么你妻子去亞利桑那州看孫子了?嗯
You know, my mom's been to... Arizona.
知道嗎，我老媽曾經(jīng)去過亞利桑那
She rode one of those mules down in the Grand Canyon.
她曾騎驢到大峽谷里
Long story short, they had to shoot it.
簡而言之，他們不得不把驢殺了
'Cause she's so fat.
因?yàn)樗?/div>
I'll get the door while you finish laughing.
我去開門，你接著笑
Hey, guys. Happy Thanksgiving.
大家好。感恩節(jié)快樂
It smells wonderful.
聞起來真不錯
Is anyone slaving away in the kitchen? Because I, too, know... Sheldon.
是不是有人在廚房里干苦力呢?因?yàn)槲乙仓?..謝爾頓
Here. Thank you for having us.
給你，謝謝你的邀請
What's with you?
你怎么了?
Oh, she's mad at me because she just found out she's married to Zack.
哦，她生我的氣，因?yàn)樗l(fā)現(xiàn)她已經(jīng)和扎克結(jié)婚了
Really? That dumb-ass she used to date? That's hysterical.
真的?你以前約會的那個二貨?太搞笑了
I can't believe I felt bad for opening this in the car.
不敢相信我在車?yán)锎蜷_酒時(shí)居然會覺得抱歉
You need any help?
需要幫助嗎?
Uh, yeah, can you, uh, reach that, uh, gravy boat up there?
嗯，你能把那個肉汁壺拿過來嗎?
Uh, sure. Great. That makes one of you.
當(dāng)然，好的，總算有人能夠得著了
Okay, we have a lot to do and not much time to do it.
好的，我們要做很多事但是時(shí)間卻不夠了
Bernadette, you're on corn, gravy and yam detail.
伯納黛特你負(fù)責(zé)玉米，肉汁和紅薯
Amy, you're on rolls, cranberries and making sure Bernadette stays away from the marshmallows.
艾米，你負(fù)責(zé)面包卷，小紅莓，并且確定伯納黛特不再偷吃棉花糖
That's right, I see you.
沒錯，我看到了
Okay, if you have any questions, I'll be over here basting my ass off.
好的，如果有任何問題，我就在這里忙著給我的烤火雞涂汁
Focus is key. Did you guys know Penny married Zack three years ago? What? Wha...?
專注是最關(guān)鍵的，你們知不知道三年前佩妮和扎克已經(jīng)結(jié)婚了?什么? 什...?
You ever play football? A little in college. You? No.
你打過橄欖球沒?大學(xué)時(shí)打過。你呢?沒有
But I did get tackled in the hallway once.
但是我在走廊被攔截摔倒過一次
The whole school cheered.
整個學(xué)校都沸騰了
Hey, I found the, uh, court papers that you and Zack need to fill out. I'll print them when we get home. Fine.
嗨，我找到了你和扎克需要填寫的法律文件了，當(dāng)我們回家的時(shí)候我就把它打印出來，好的
And we can just put this whole thing behind us. Are you done? What?
然后我們就當(dāng)他完全沒發(fā)生過夠了沒?
Look, I get it, I screwed up. Is this all we're gonna talk about the rest of the day?
怎么了? 聽著，我知道了，我犯了錯，我們接下來的一整天都要一直談?wù)撨@個嗎?
Why are you mad at me? You're the one that did the stupid thing. I'm just trying to fix it. Ugh!
干啥沖我發(fā)火?你才是那個做傻事的人，我只是在想解決辦法， 噢!
I need some air.
我要去透透氣
Penny Well... Now, I don't know the first thing about women, but I would not follow her.
佩妮...我不知道和女人相處的第一準(zhǔn)則是什么，但是我不會追她的
Listen to Stretch.
聽這個竹竿的沒錯
How am I the bad guy?
我怎么成了壞人了?
She's the one who married someone else. I'm the victim.
她才是和別人結(jié)婚的人，我是受害者
Sounds like Zack's the victim. You're sleeping with his wife.
聽起來扎克才是受害者，你把他老婆睡了
I've kept my marriage together for 35 years. Can I weigh in here? Sure.
我已經(jīng)結(jié)婚35年了，我能在這兒發(fā)表點(diǎn)意見嗎?當(dāng)然
I'm trying to watch the game. Shut up.
我想看比賽，閉嘴。
