生活大爆炸第七季:第8集:謝耳朵的報復(fù)(下)
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Hey, what're you working on?
嘿，你在忙什么呢?
I'm thinking about how one could use the fact that a rapidly rotating mirror turns virtual photons into real ones as a method of observing dark energy.
我在想怎么能利用一面迅速旋轉(zhuǎn)的鏡子能將虛粒子轉(zhuǎn)化為實粒子來作為觀察暗物質(zhì)的方法
That's a pretty cool idea.
這想法太酷了
Yeah. It's great you're here.
是啊，你在這太好了
I'd love to get an engineer's opinion. Sure.
我正好想聽聽工程師的想法，樂意效勞
This chair is squeaky.
這椅子老吱吱響
Now, do I fix it or get a new one?
你覺得我是修呢還是買個新的?
Well, Sheldon, it took me all morning, Sheldon but I found the owner of the video store.
我花了一早上的時間，但我找到了那家音像店的老板了
And I am happy to report that he died peacefully in his sleep, drunk at the bottom of a pool.
我很高興的告訴你他已在睡夢中安詳?shù)厮廊?，在游泳池底爛醉如泥了
Anyway, there is no one to return the DVD to, so this issue is resolved. Ah...
不管怎樣，DVD就沒法還了，所以問題解決啦。啊...
And I'd just like to point out that even though the sweater was uncomfortable, I didn't use it as an excuse to antagonize everyone around me.
我想指出的是，盡管這件毛衣讓我極其不舒服，我并沒有找借口去敵視我周圍的每一個人
You know, you could reimburse the video store owner's next of kin. Or it's resolved!
你知道你可以賠償給這家音像店老板最近的親屬?；蛘呔彤斶@問題解決了!
Hey, that next of kin thing sounds pretty good.
嘿，還給最近的親屬這主意聽起來挺不錯
I believe this is yours.
我想這是你的吧
Can I ask you guys a question?
我能問你一個問題嗎?
So, I'm seeing Lucy tomorrow night, and I've never hung out with someone who broke up with me.
我明天晚上要去見露西，可是我從來沒有和一個和我分手的人出去過
How do you do it?
你是怎么做到的?
You can't let her know you're hurting.
你不能讓她知道你很受傷
You know, the key is confidence.
你知道的，關(guān)鍵就是自信
Why is the key always confidence?
為什么自信永遠是關(guān)鍵呢?
How come it's never love handles and flop sweat?
為什么不是腰間贅肉和緊張得出汗呢?
If this girl hurt you so much, are you sure you want to see her again?
既然這個女孩傷你這么深，你確定你還想再見她嗎?
Well, if I may... he has so little self-respect and is so desperate for the smallest crumb of affection
我能插一句嗎...他沒什么自尊可言，又這么絕望得想得到一丁點喜愛
she could literally sleep with his own father in his own bed and post the video to YouTube, and he'd still buy her flowers and ask her to be his bride.
她都能在他床上和他爸爸做愛，然后把視頻上傳到Y(jié)ouTube上，最后他仍會給她買花，然后娶她為妻
He's right.
他說得對
But in my defense, if we could survive that, we could survive anything.
但從我的角度來說，如果我們連這種事都挺過來了，還有什么挺不過來呢
Well, if you're sure you want to do this, it's only coffee... just relax and see what happens.
好吧，如果你確定你想這么做，只是喝杯咖啡...放輕松點然后靜觀其變吧
Well, can I say she looks nice? Sure.
嗯，我能說她很漂亮嗎?當然
Can I tell her I miss her?
我能告訴她我很想她嗎?
Maybe, if she asks.
也許吧，如果她問的話
Oh, can I show her an oil painting I made of us surrounded by our children and grandchildren?
噢，我能給她看那張我畫的的油畫上面有我們子孫繞膝的場景嗎?
I'd save that for the second date.
那句話還是第二次約會再說吧
Good, good. 'Cause no matter how hard I try, I cannot get the twins to look alike.
好的，沒問題。因為我無論怎么努力，都不能讓雙胞胎長的一樣
What are you doing?
你在干啥?
Oh, I'm just trying to find the stupid next of kin to this stupid video store owner
哦，我只是在找這個二逼音像店老板的二逼最近親屬
so I can return the DVD and see the look on Sheldon's stupid face when he sees that I didn't let this get to me.
這樣我就能把DVD還回去了，然后看看謝爾頓意識到這件事沒有讓我抓狂時那張傻臉上的表情
Sheldon's not here.
謝爾頓沒在這啊
Why don't you take the sweater off? Th-Th-There's a principle at stake!
為何不把毛衣脫了?在危機關(guān)頭需要堅持原則
Which is? Oh, I don't know. Who cares? Look at me!
什么原則? 我不知道。管他呢? 看看我
Oh, my God! Is that sweater made of bees?
天吶！那個毛衣是蜜蜂做的嗎
Come on, take it off. I won't tell. No, no, honey, if I take it off, Sheldon wins.
來吧，脫了它，我不會說的，不不，親愛的，如果我脫了，謝爾頓就贏了
Sweetie... every night you don't kill him in his sleep, he wins.
寶貝，每一個你沒有在他睡覺時殺了他的夜晚他都在贏
Nah, i-it's... it's almost done. I just, I have to find... the next of kin, and send 'em the DVD and then just wait for someone with my complexion to die, so I can get a skin graft.
額，就... 就快好了，我只需要找到...最近親屬，然后把DVD送還給他們，然后等著和我有一樣皮膚的人死去，這樣我就能做個皮膚移植手術(shù)了
Smile. What-what is that?
笑一個。那是什么?
What is that for?
拍這個干啥?
So you can send it to Princeton and get your money back.
這樣你就能把它寄到普林斯頓大學(xué)，然后把錢要回來
I must say, Sheldon, you're handling this DVD business with an impressive amount of maturity.
不得不說，謝爾頓，你處理DVD這件事表現(xiàn)出了驚人的成熟
I don't know why that surprises you.
我不知道你有啥好驚訝的
I'm a grown man.
我是個成年人了
As should be evident by this sport coat and very real flower in my lapel.
通過這件休閑西服和翻領(lǐng)上的花可以完全看得出
Is there some kind of new coping mechanism you're employing?
你是不是在使用某種新的應(yīng)對機制?
The more interesting question you should be asking is, "What does this flower smell like?"
你更應(yīng)該問的問題是這朵花聞起來如何?
I'm gonna go with sad.
我會猜它聞起來很傷心
So what's the story with you and this DVD?
所以說說你和這個DVD之間有什么故事?
There's nothing to tell.
沒什么好說的
Maybe I purchased a book entitled, Don't Sweat the Small Stuff and I followed its wise suggestions, one of which was: stop and smell the flowers.
也許我買了一本書叫做《別為小事抓狂》，然后我采納了里面的建議，其中之一就是:停下腳步，聞聞這些花
Seriously? Please.
要不要這樣?請吧
Ha-ha! Oh. Hi. Hello.
哈哈!噢，嗨，你好
Oh, it's so good to see you. You, too. Please, sit.
哦，真高興見到你，我也是，請坐
I, uh, I got you a cappuccino.
我...給你買了卡布奇諾
I remembered it was your favorite.
我記得這是你的最愛
Oh. I also got crumb cake, but I remembered it was my favorite and I ate it.
喔，我也點了碎屑蛋糕，但是我想起來是我喜歡吃的，所以我就吃光了
Anyway, uh, how are you?
那么，你最近如何?
I'm pretty good.
很不錯
Listen, I just wanted to apologize for breaking up with you in an e-mail. Well, and I ate all the crumb cake. We both made mistakes. Okay.
聽著，我很抱歉，我用郵件和你分手的，唔，我也把整個蛋糕都吃了，所以我們都犯了錯。好吧
I'm so happy you asked me here, and I hope we can hang out again sometime.
我很高興你約我來這，我希望我們以后還能一起出去
You know, as friends, lovemaking partners, whatever.
以朋友身份，或者性伴侶，隨便啦
Oh, uh... I'm kind of seeing someone.
哦，唔...我已經(jīng)在和人約會了
I think I know the answer to this, but just to be clear, it's not me, right?
我想我知道這個問題的答案，但是只是確定一下，那人不是我，對吧?
This is all your fault!
都是你的錯!
I should've listened to Mun-Mun, because I've been playing with a cobra and her name is Penny!
我早應(yīng)該聽貓鼬蒙蒙的話，因為我一直在和一個眼鏡蛇玩，她的名字就是佩妮!
Why are you so cruel? Do you enjoy my pain?
你為何如此殘忍?我痛苦你很開心嗎?
There's a girl at the Cheesecake Factory I can set you up with.
我在芝士蛋糕店認識個女孩，可以幫你撮合一下
I love you, Penny!
我愛你，佩妮!
How is it I can conceptualize a methodology of examining dark matter in the universe but can't figure out how to fix a novelty squirt flower?
為何我可以想出一個檢驗宇宙暗物質(zhì)的方法，但是卻無法把這個新型噴水花給修好
I think the real question is, why do you waste your time with cheap, childish pranks?
我想真正的問題在于為什么你把時間浪費在小孩子玩的廉價惡作劇玩具上?
There's probably a deep reason.
我想這其中有深層的理論
Which I'd be happy to discuss with you over some peanut brittle in a can.
我很愿意和你邊吃花生糖一邊探討
Okay, Sheldon, I am out of options!
好吧，謝爾頓，我沒轍了
Video store owner, Nursis Manookian, has no next of kin!
音像店老板沒有親戚!
Well, you seem hot under the collar...
唔，你看起來在領(lǐng)子下很熱啊(很生氣)
or is that the sweater?
還是毛衣的問題?
Oh, oh, no, no. I-It's because I spent all afternoon at the Armenian church where his funeral mass was held.
哦，不不，不是的。這是因為我整個下午都在他辦葬禮彌撒的那個亞美尼亞教堂
According to Father Solakian, no one attended.
據(jù)Solakian神父說沒有一個人參加
Luckily, my trip wasn't a complete waste. I lit a candle and prayed for your death.
幸運的是，我不算白跑一趟，我點了根蠟燭，祈禱你快死
But I'm not Armenian, so it probably won't work!
但我不是亞美尼亞人，所以這很可能沒用!
This is over, right?
這可算完了，對吧?
Oh, not necessarily.
噢，那可不一定
I suggest you look for long-lost relatives either in Armenia or Lebanon.
我建議你可以找找他久未謀面的親戚，在亞美尼亞或是黎巴嫩
Listen to me, Sheldon.
聽著，謝爾頓
I am not going to Lebanon to return Super Mario Bros. the movie!
我不會到黎巴嫩去還你的超級瑪麗電影!
You know, it might be fun.
你知道，這可能很有意思呢
You love hummus.
你可愛鷹嘴豆泥了
Why isn't this bothering you?
為什么這不會困擾你?
I-Isn't your brain getting itchy?
你腦子不是癢嗎?
This is on your card.
這是你的卡借的
This could be ruining your credit score! Why isn't this making you crazy?
這會毀了你的信用記錄!為什么這不會讓你發(fā)瘋?
Leonard... I have something to tell you, but I want you to promise not to flip out.
萊納德...萊納德...我有些事要告訴你，但我要你保證你不會抓狂
What? Seven years ago, I found out the DVD was late and I paid for it.
什么?七年前，我發(fā)現(xiàn)這個DVD已經(jīng)逾期了，然后我就付錢買了
What? I was going to mention it at the time, but then I thought, some day, this might be a teachable moment.
你說什么?我那時本來是要告訴你的，但那時我想，也許有一天,這會成為一個具有教育意義的時刻
Hah... I... You... How can... What?!
你你...我...你...怎么能...神馬?!
Sheldon... Sheldon... that was diabolical.
謝爾頓...謝爾頓...你太狠了
I know. And it wasn't easy.
我知道。這很不容易
Do you have any idea what it's like to wait for years and never know, if you're going to finally get satisfaction?
你能想象嗎?這要等待數(shù)年卻不知道最后能不能心滿意足
Wow. You're even prettier than Penny said.
哇，你比佩妮說的還要漂亮
I can't believe a girl like you doesn't have a boyfriend.
我簡直不能相信像你這么漂亮的女孩竟然沒有男朋友
Well, I don't. I don't believe you, you're lying to me!
嗯，我是沒有，我不相信你，你在撒謊!
What? Oh, it's okay. I have no morals and I'm desperately lonely.
什么?噢，沒關(guān)系的，我很沒節(jié)操而且我極度孤獨
I'll be the other man, if you want a little something-something on the side.
如果你私下里需要一絲絲慰藉，我不介意當小三的
What is wrong with you?! What is wrong with you?! What is wrong with you?!
你腦子進了多少水啊?!你腦子進了多少水啊?!你腦子進了多少水啊?!
