我強迫自己把注意力集中在兩個最重要的,我必須解決的問題上,但我實在很不情愿這樣做。
First, I had to decide if it was possible that what Jacob had said about the Cullens could be true.
首先,我必須作出判斷,有沒有這種可能,即雅克布所說的關(guān)于卡倫一家的事是真的。
Immediately my mind responded with a resoundingnegative. It was silly and morbid to entertain suchridiculous notions. But what, then? I asked myself. There was no rational explanation for how I was alive at this moment. I listed again in my head the things I'd observed myself: the impossible speed and strength, the eye colorshifting from black to gold and back again, the inhuman beauty, the pale, frigid skin. And more — small things that registered slowly — how they never seemed to eat, the disturbing gracewith which they moved. And the way be sometimes spoke, with unfamiliar cadences and phrases that better fit the style of a turn-of-the-century novel than that of a twenty-first-century classroom. He had skipped class the day we'd done blood typing. He hadn't said no to the beach trip till he heard where we were going. He seemed to know what everyone around him was thinking… except me. He had told me he was the villain, dangerous…
我的心立刻作出了強烈的否定回答。用這么荒謬的想法來取樂既愚蠢又神經(jīng)。但是,那又怎樣呢?沒有一個合理的解釋能說明為什么此時此刻我還活著。我又一次在腦海中列出我自己觀察到的東西:不可思議的速度和強壯,從黑色變成金色然后又變回來的眸色,超越常人的美麗,蒼白冰冷的肌膚。還有更多——一件件小事慢慢地顯露出來——譬如他們似乎從不吃東西,他們的舉止優(yōu)雅地驚人。還有有時候他們說話的方式,那種陌生的抑揚頓挫和遣詞用句更適合于一本另一個世紀的小說的風(fēng)格,而非二十一世紀的教室。我們檢測血型那天他翹課了。他一直沒說不去海灘之旅,直到他聽到我們要去的地方。他似乎知道他周圍的每個人都在想些什么……除了我。他告訴過我他是壞人,非常危險……
Could the Cullens be vampires?
卡倫一家有可能是吸血鬼嗎?
Well, they were something. Something outside the possibility of rational justification was taking place in front of my incredulous eyes. Whether it be Jacob's cold ones or my own superhero theory, Edward Cullen was not… human. He was something more.
嗯,他們確實是某種東西。某種在合理判斷的可能性之外的事情正在我明察秋毫的眼睛前發(fā)生著。不管是雅克布所說的冷族還是我自己的超級英雄論,愛德華·卡倫都不會是……人類。他是某種超越人類的存在。
So then — maybe. That would have to be my answer for now.
那么——或許吧。這就是我現(xiàn)在能得出的結(jié)論。
And then the most important question of all. What was I going to do if it was true?
另一個問題尤為重要。如果這是真的,我要怎么做?