暮光之城?暮色 第25期:打開的書(6)
邁克在我們進門時哈哈大笑地追上了我們，融冰在將他的發(fā)穗上慢慢化開。我們排隊買飯的時候，他和杰西卡在繪聲繪色地談論打雪仗的情形。我習慣性地瞥了角落里的那張桌子一眼，然后就僵在那兒了。桌上坐著5個人。
Jessica pulled on my arm.
杰西卡拽了一下我的胳膊。
"Hello? Bella? What do you want?"
"喂?貝拉?你要點兒什么?"
I looked down; my ears were hot. I had no reason to feel self-conscious, I reminded myself. I hadn't done anything wrong.
我垂下頭望著地上;雙耳滾燙。我沒有理由感到不好意思，我提醒自己。我沒做錯什么。
"What's with Bella?" Mike asked Jessica.
"貝拉怎么啦?"邁克問杰西卡。
"Nothing," I answered. "I'll just get a soda today." I caught up to the end of the line.
"沒事兒，"我回答，"今天我就要一杯蘇打水。"我追上了隊尾。
"Aren't you hungry?" Jessica asked.
"你不餓?"杰西卡問。
"Actually, I feel a little sick," I said, my eyes still on the floor.
"實際上，我有點兒不舒服，"我說，雙眼依然望著地上。
I waited for them to get their food, and then followed them to a table, my eyes on my feet.
我等候他們買好飯，然后跟著他們?nèi)チ艘粡堊雷?，兩眼看著自己的雙腳。
I sipped my soda slowly, my stomach churning. Twice Mike asked, with unnecessaryconcern, how I was feeling.
我不緊不慢地啜飲自己的蘇打水，胃里直翻騰。邁克問了兩遍，瞎操心，問我感覺如何。
I told him it was nothing, but I was wondering if I should play it up and escape to the nurse's office for the next hour.
我告訴他沒事兒，可我心里在想，下節(jié)課我是不是應該裝不舒服，逃到護士辦公室去。
Ridiculous. I shouldn't have to run away.
可笑。我又沒做虧心事，憑什么非得逃跑啊?
I decided to permit myself one glance at the Cullen family's table. If he was glaring at me, I would skip Biology, like the coward I was.
我決定讓自己再瞥愛德華他們幾個坐的那張桌子一眼。要是他在瞪我的話，我就逃掉生物課了，就像從前一樣，再當一回膽小鬼。
I kept my head down and glanced up under my lashes. None of them were looking this way. I lifted my head a little.
我沒抬起頭來，而是從睫毛下面往上瞥了一眼。他們誰都沒望著這個方向。我稍微抬了抬頭。
They were laughing. Edward, Jasper, and Emmett all had their hair entirely saturated with melting snow. Alice and Rosalie were leaning away as Emmett shook his dripping hair toward them. They were enjoying the snowy day, just like everyone else — only they looked more like ascene from a movie than the rest of us.
他們在哈哈大笑。愛德華、賈斯帕和埃美特的頭發(fā)全都讓融雪徹底浸透了。愛麗絲和羅莎莉正歪向一側(cè)，因為埃美特沖她倆在使勁兒甩著滴水的頭發(fā)。他們在盡情享受雪天的樂趣，就像所有其他人一樣——只是他們比我們其余的人更像是某部電影里的一個鏡頭。
But, aside from the laughter and playfulness, there was something different, and I couldn't quite pinpoint what that difference was. I examined Edward the most carefully. His skin was less pale, I decided — flushed from the snow fight maybe — the circles under his eyes much lessnoticeable. But there was something more. I pondered, staring, trying to isolate the change.
不過，除了笑聲和頑皮之外，還是有一些不一樣的地方，是什么地方不一樣，我說不太準確。我對愛德華的觀察最為仔細。他的皮膚沒那么蒼白了，我判定——或許是打雪仗打紅了的——他眼睛下面的眼圈遠沒有前幾天那樣明顯了。但還不止這些。我一邊盯著瞧，一邊回想，試圖找出是哪里有了變化。
"Bella, what are you staring at?" Jessica intruded, her eyes following my stare.
"貝拉，你在盯著瞧什么呀?"杰西卡擾亂了我的思路，她順著我的目光看了過去。
At that precise moment, his eyes flashed over to meet mine.
就在那一刻，他的目光閃過來和我的碰了個正著。
I dropped my head, letting my hair fall to conceal my face. I was sure, though, in the instant our eyes met, that he didn't look harsh or unfriendly as he had the last time I'd seen him. He looked merely curious again, unsatisfied in some way.
我低下了頭，讓頭發(fā)垂下來遮住了我的臉。雖然我們的目光只有那么一霎那的交匯，然而，我可以有把握地說，他的目光不像上次我看到他時那么銳利和不友好了。他顯得只是又很好奇了，還有些不滿。
"Edward Cullen is staring at you," Jessica giggled in my ear.
"愛德華·卡倫在盯著你看呢，"杰西卡在我耳邊咯咯地笑著說道。
"He doesn't look angry, does he?" I couldn't help asking.
"他看上去沒有生氣，對吧?"我禁不住問道。
"No," she said, sounding confused by my question. "Should he be?" "I don't think he likes me," I confided. I still felt queasy. I put my head down on my arm.
"對，"她說，聽上去好像讓我給問糊涂了，"他應該生氣嗎?""我認為他不喜歡我，"我吐露了自己的想法。我還是感覺要吐。我把頭放到了胳膊上。
"The Cullens don't like anybody… well, they don't notice anybody enough to like them. But he's still staring at you."
"卡倫他們幾個誰都不喜歡……唔，他們對誰都不多瞅幾眼，怎么會喜歡呢?不過他還在盯著你瞧呢。"
"Stop looking at him," I hissed.
"別看他了，"我噓聲說道。
She snickered, but she looked away. I raised my head enough to make sure that she did, contemplating violence if she resisted.
她發(fā)出了竊笑，但還是把目光移開了。我抬起頭看了看她，以確認她沒有繼續(xù)在看愛德華，思量著要是她拒不服從，我就使用暴力。
Mike interrupted us then — he was planning an epic battle of the blizzard in the parking lot after school and wanted us to join. Jessica agreed enthusiastically. The way she looked at Mike left little doubt that she would be up for anything he suggested. I kept silent. I would have to hide in the gym until the parking lot cleared.
這時，邁克打斷了我們——他正在籌劃放學后在停車場搞一次超大規(guī)模的雪仗，并且想要我們參加。杰西卡熱烈響應，她看邁克的那副樣子，叫人看了絲毫不會懷疑，邁克讓她干什么她都會乖乖地去干。我保持沉默。我恐怕得躲在體育館里，等停車場沒人了再出來。
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