專家建議:如何在網上邂逅浪漫

好好想想：你究竟想要什么

Before you even think about logging on, you need to know what you want. "One of the things that people don't think about is that they should be sure what they're looking for," says Caroline Lovett, Qualified Psychosexual Therapist and member of COSRT. "Is what they're looking for a sexual hookup or is what they're looking for a relationship? Those are quite different things."

上線前，搞清楚自己想要什么。"人們不會考慮這樣一件事：明確自己的對象目標，"持證性心理治療師、COSRT會員卡羅琳·洛維特說道。"他們究竟是只想約炮還是想認真談一段感情?這是兩碼事。"

Beware of scammers

小心詐騙犯

The ugly truth is that online scammers thrive on dating sites. Whether or not you fall prey to their tricks likely depends on your personality. One study from the British Psychological Society(BPS) found that sensitive and less emotionally people are more likely to fall for scams on the most popular dating sites.

真相是丑陋的：約會網站上流竄著各類詐騙犯。你的個性決定了你是否會落入他們的圈套。英國心理學會開展的一項研究發(fā)現(xiàn)：在最受歡迎的約會網站上，敏感且情緒波動較少的人更容易上當受騙。

Be your authentic self

做真實的自己

Instead of being fake, you should try to show an authentic version of yourself. "That goes on in regular dating too to a certain extent," warns Lovett. "You put your best self forward. But in the cyber dating world, it doesn't even have to be a version of yourself. It can be a made-uppersona."

不要裝了，盡可能的呈現(xiàn)自己的真實面吧。"這在一定程度上也適用于普通約會，"洛維特警告道。"呈現(xiàn)自己最好的一面。但在網戀世界中，你呈現(xiàn)的不一定是你自己，可能只是一個虛構出來的形象。"

Quit bragging about yourself

不要吹噓自己

Confidence is an attractive quality, but bragging is not. Research from the University of Iowa suggests that bragging, i.e. constantly saying positive things about yourself, could lead to you being seen as less socially attractive. While it's fine to be proud of who you are, you should also try to be modest.

自信是一種迷人的品質，吹噓可不是。愛荷華大學開展的研究表明：吹牛，即經常性地肯定自己，可能會導致自己的魅力減弱。雖然為自己感到自豪是一件好事，但也得適可而止、保持謙遜啊。

Choose a friendly picture

選一張友好的照片做頭像

Let's talk about the trickiest task of all; choosing your profile picture. As Lovett explains, the image you choose rests largely on what you want. "A friendly image is always going to be more appealing to someone who is looking for a relationship," she explains. "If it's more about a hookup or sex, the image is going to be more provocative."

最棘手的部分：挑選頭像。洛維特解釋道，你選的照片很大程度上取決于你想要什么。"對于尋找另一半的人而言，一張友好的照片總是更具吸引力，"她解釋道。"但如果你更想找個炮友或性伙伴，那挑逗性照片的效果可能更佳。"

Be upfront about what you expect

坦白你的預期

Trying to play it cool? Perhaps you should stop. "Based on the clients I've worked with, their experiences are better when they've been upfront," says Lovett. "You've got nothing to lose. You don't know this person. You haven't established a relationship with them."

試圖玩'假裝無所謂'這一招?或許你該停手了。"以我的客戶情況為參照，坦白心中所想的效果更加，"洛維特說道。"你又不會失去什么。你根本就不認識這個人呀，你還沒和他/她確立戀愛關系呢。"