如何進(jìn)行異地戀談話
The best practice is to simply be honest and straightforward. You need to take a hard look at your relationship, your needs, where the relationship is going, and have a big talk. Be honest. There are emotions which are hard to put aside to think what is best. Sure, you will miss each other if it doesn't work, but you will hate each other if one winds up cheating.
最好的做法很簡單,就是要誠實(shí)要坦率。你們需要認(rèn)真審視感情、你們的需求和戀愛發(fā)展的方向,并好好聊一聊。一定要誠實(shí)。有些情感你很難把它放在一邊,然后去考慮什么是最好的選擇。當(dāng)然有時(shí)談過了你們也會彼此想念,但如果有一方說謊,另一方會很痛恨的。
What Real Women Say: " I think I do remember my awkward, insecure, teen self asking him if he would stay with me if I went away in our first conversation about my college choice," says Elyse, 31. " I also remember that, at the time, his answer was not immediate, or definitive. I know I was hurt by that at the time, but I think, looking back it was fairly mature of him not to lie to me. He had to think about it and decide whether or not he was willing to make that commitment. Several months later, we were both all in. We talked about it and expressed to each other that we were both willing to do whatever it took to make it work. "
異地戀女性親身體會:31歲的Elyse說:“我覺得自己真的還記得第一次聊到我大學(xué)的選擇時(shí)尷尬、缺乏安全感的青年時(shí)期的自己,我問他如果我離開他是否還會和我在一起。我也記得當(dāng)時(shí)他沒有立刻給我一個(gè)肯定的回答,我知道這當(dāng)時(shí)讓我很受傷,但我想現(xiàn)在回想起來當(dāng)時(shí)他很成熟沒有騙我,他要考慮好再決定是否愿意給我承諾。幾個(gè)月以后我們依然在一起,聊到這件事時(shí)我們都表示愿意盡最大努力把戀愛繼續(xù)下去。”
What To Do To Make Long-Distance Manageable
如何管理好異地戀
"When attempting a long-distance relationship, the most important thing is to try to make the relationship as 'normal' as possible," says Bennett. "This means trying to share special moments, like holidays, birthdays, and the general daily joys and sorrows that couples who are together in person take for granted. Fortunately, technology makes sharing life moments easier than ever. "
Bennett說:“嘗試異地戀時(shí)最重要的是要盡量使異地戀‘正常’,這意味著努力去分享那些膩在一起的情侶習(xí)以為常的特殊時(shí)刻,像節(jié)日、生日和每天的快樂和悲傷。幸運(yùn)的是科技使我們比以往更容易分享生活瞬間了。”
What Real Women Say: "My husband and I were actually long distance all through college and part of law school," says Julianna, 30. "There is no gadget that can help sustain a healthy, long-distance relationship other than constant communication, but the one thing that helped us specifically was that we scheduled time each week to have a 'date' on the phone, or Face time. We usually ate dinner or lunch at the same time. "
異地戀女性親身體會:30歲的Julianna說:“我丈夫和我其實(shí)整個(gè)大學(xué)期間和法學(xué)院部分時(shí)間一直是異地,保持健康異地關(guān)系的關(guān)鍵無外乎是保持聯(lián)系,但有一件事真的對我們很有幫助,那就是我們每周都會約定時(shí)間在電話里或Facetime 上‘約會’,我們經(jīng)常同時(shí)吃晚餐或午餐。”
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