1
By eight o'clock the light was failing. The loud speaker in the tower of the Stoke Poges Club House began, in a more than human tenor, to announce the closing of the courses. Lenina and Henry abandoned their game and walked back towards the Club. From the grounds of the Internal and External Secretion Trust came the lowing of those thousands of cattle which provided, with their hormones and their milk, the raw materials for the great factory at Farnham Royal.
An incessant buzzing of helicopters filled the twilight. Every two and a half minutes a bell and the screech of whistles announced the departure of one of the light monorail trains which carried the lower-caste golfers back from their separate course to the metropolis.
Lenina and Henry climbed into their machine and started off. At eight hundred feet Henry slowed down the helicopter screws, and they hung for a minute or two poised above the fading landscape. The forest of Burnham Beeches stretched like a great pool of darkness towards the bright shore of the western sky. Crimson at the horizon, the last of the sunset faded, through orange, upwards into yellow and a pale watery green. Northwards, beyond and above the trees, the Internal and External Secretions factory glared with a fierce electric brilliance from every window of its twenty stories. Beneath them lay the buildings of the Golf Club—the huge lower-caste barracks and, on the other side of a dividing wall, the smaller houses reserved for Alpha and Beta members. The approaches to the monorail station were black with the ant-like pullulation of lower-caste activity. From under the glass vault a lighted train shot out into the open. Following its south-easterly course across the dark plain their eyes were drawn to the majestic buildings of the Slough Crematorium. For the safety of night-flying planes, its four tall chimneys were flood-lighted and tipped with crimson danger signals. It was a landmark.
“Why do the smoke-stacks have those things like balconies around them?” enquired Lenina.
“Phosphorus recovery,” explained Henry telegraphically. “On their way up the chimney the gases go through four separate treatments. P2O5 used to go right out of circulation every time they cremated some one. Now they recover over ninety-eight per cent of it. More than a kilo and a half per adult corpse. Which makes the best part of four hundred tons of phosphorus every year from England alone.” Henry spoke with a happy pride, rejoicing wholeheartedly in the achievement, as though it had been his own. “Fine to think we can go on being socially useful even after we're dead. Making plants grow.”
Lenina, meanwhile, had turned her eyes away and was looking perpendicularly downwards at the monorail station. “Fine,” she agreed. “But queer that Alphas and Betas won't make any more plants grow than those nasty little Gammas and Deltas and Epsilons down there.”
“All men are physico-chemically equal,” said Henry sententiously. “Besides, even Epsilons perform indispensable services.”
“Even an Epsilon…” Lenina suddenly remembered an occasion when, as a little girl at school, she had woken up in the middle of the night and become aware, for the first time, of the whispering that had haunted all her sleeps. She saw again the beam of moonlight, the row of small white beds; heard once more the soft, soft voice that said (the words were there, unforgotten, unforgettable after so many night-long repetitions): “Every one works for every one else. We can't do without any one. Even Epsilons are useful. We couldn't do without Epsilons. Every one works for every one else. We can't do without any one…” Lenina remembered her first shock of fear and surprise; her speculations through half a wakeful hour; and then, under the influence of those endless repetitions, the gradual soothing of her mind, the soothing, the smoothing, the stealthy creeping of sleep….
“I suppose Epsilons don't really mind being Epsilons,” she said aloud.
“Of course they don't. How can they? They don't know what it's like being anything else. We'd mind, of course. But then we've been differently conditioned. Besides, we start with a different heredity.”
“I'm glad I'm not an Epsilon,” said Lenina, with conviction.
“And if you were an Epsilon,” said Henry, “your conditioning would have made you no less thankful that you weren't a Beta or an Alpha.” He put his forward propeller into gear and headed the machine towards London. Behind them, in the west, the crimson and orange were almost faded; a dark bank of cloud had crept into the zenith. As they flew over the Crematorium, the plane shot upwards on the column of hot air rising from the chimneys, only to fall as suddenly when it passed into the descending chill beyond.
“What a marvellous switchback!” Lenina laughed delightedly.
But Henry's tone was almost, for a moment, melancholy. “Do you know what that switchback was?” he said. “It was some human being finally and definitely disappearing. Going up in a squirt of hot gas. It would be curious to know who it was—a man or a woman, an Alpha or an Epsilon….” He sighed. Then, in a resolutely cheerful voice, “Anyhow,” he concluded, “there's one thing we can be certain of; whoever he may have been, he was happy when he was alive. Everybody's happy now.”
“Yes, everybody's happy now,” echoed Lenina. They had heard the words repeated a hundred and fifty times every night for twelve years.
Landing on the roof of Henry's forty-story apartment house in Westminster, they went straight down to the dining-hall. There, in a loud and cheerful company, they ate an excellent meal. Soma was served with the coffee. Lenina took two half-gramme tablets and Henry three. At twenty past nine they walked across the street to the newly opened Westminster Abbey Cabaret. It was a night almost without clouds, moonless and starry; but of this on the whole depressing fact Lenina and Henry were fortunately unaware. The electric sky-signs effectively shut off the outer darkness. “CALVIN STOPES AND HIS SIXTEEN SEXOPHONISTS.” From the façade of the new Abbey the giant letters invitingly glared. “LONDON'S FINEST SCENT AND COLOUR ORGAN. ALL THE LATEST SYNTHETIC MUSIC.”
They entered. The air seemed hot and somehow breathless with the scent of ambergris and sandalwood. On the domed ceiling of the hall, the colour organ had momentarily painted a tropical sunset. The Sixteen Sexophonists were playing an old favourite: “There ain't no Bottle in all the world like that dear little Bottle of mine.” Four hundred couples were five-stepping round the polished floor. Lenina and Henry were soon the four hundred and first. The sexophones wailed like melodious cats under the moon, moaned in the alto and tenor registers as though the little death were upon them. Rich with a wealth of harmonics, their tremulous chorus mounted towards a climax, louder and ever louder—until at last, with a wave of his hand, the conductor let loose the final shattering note of ether-music and blew the sixteen merely human blowers clean out of existence. Thunder in A flat major. And then, in all but silence, in all but darkness, there followed a gradual deturgescence, a diminuendo sliding gradually, through quarter tones, down, down to a faintly whispered dominant chord that lingered on (while the five-four rhythms still pulsed below) charging the darkened seconds with an intense expectancy. And at last expectancy was fulfilled. There was a sudden explosive sunrise, and simultaneously, the Sixteen burst into song:
“Bottle of mine, it's you I've always wanted!
Bottle of mine, why was I ever decanted?
Skies are blue inside of you,
The weather's always fine;
For
There ain 't no Bottle in all the world
Like that dear little Bottle of mine.”
Five-stepping with the other four hundred round and round Westminster Abbey, Lenina and Henry were yet dancing in another world—the warm, the richly coloured, the infinitely friendly world of soma-holiday. How kind, how good-looking, how delightfully amusing every one was! “Bottle of mine, it's you I've always wanted…” But Lenina and Henry had what they wanted…They were inside, here and now—safely inside with the fine weather, the perennially blue sky. And when, exhausted, the Sixteen had laid by their sexophones and the Synthetic Music apparatus was producing the very latest in slow Malthusian Blues, they might have been twin embryos gently rocking together on the waves of a bottled ocean of blood-surrogate.
“Good-night, dear friends. Good-night, dear friends.” The loud speakers veiled their commands in a genial and musical politeness. “Good-night, dear friends…”
Obediently, with all the others, Lenina and Henry left the building. The depressing stars had travelled quite some way across the heavens. But though the separating screen of the sky-signs had now to a great extent dissolved, the two young people still retained their happy ignorance of the night.
Swallowing half an hour before closing time, that second dose of soma had raised a quite impenetrable wall between the actual universe and their minds. Bottled, they crossed the street; bottled, they took the lift up to Henry's room on the twenty-eighth floor. And yet, bottled as she was, and in spite of that second gramme of soma, Lenina did not forget to take all the contraceptive precautions prescribed by the regulations. Years of intensive hypnopaedia and, from twelve to seventeen, Malthusian drill three times a week had made the taking of these precautions almost as automatic and inevitable as blinking.
“Oh, and that reminds me,” she said, as she came back from the bathroom, “Fanny Crowne wants to know where you found that lovely green morocco-surrogate cartridge belt you gave me.”
2
Alternate Thursdays were Bernard's Solidarity Service days. After an early dinner at the Aphroditaeum (to which Helrnholtz had recently been elected under Rule Two) he took leave of his friend and, hailing a taxi on the roof, told the man to fly to the Fordson Community Singery. The machine rose a couple of hundred metres, then headed eastwards, and as it turned, there before Bernard's eyes, gigantically beautiful, was the Singery. Flood-lighted, its three hundred and twenty metres of white Carrara-surrogate gleamed with a snowy incandescence over Ludgate Hill; at each of the four corners of its helicopter platform an immense T shone crimson against the night, and from the mouths of twenty-four vast golden trumpets rumbled a solemn synthetic music.
“Damn, I'm late,” Bernard said to himself as he first caught sight of Big Henry, the Singery clock. And sure enough, as he was paying off his cab, Big Henry sounded the hour. “Ford,” sang out an immense bass voice from all the golden trumpets. “Ford, Ford, Ford…” Nine times. Bernard ran for the lift.
The great auditorium for Ford's Day celebrations and other massed Community Sings was at the bottom of the building. Above it, a hundred to each floor, were the seven thousand rooms used by Solidarity Groups for their fortnightly services. Bernard dropped down to floor thirty-three, hurried along the corridor, stood hesitating for a moment outside Room 3210, then, having wound himself up, opened the door and walked in.
Thank Ford! he was not the last. Three chairs of the twelve arranged round the circular table were still unoccupied. He slipped into the nearest of them as inconspicuously as he could and prepared to frown at the yet later comers whenever they should arrive.
Turning towards him, “What were you playing this afternoon?” the girl on his left enquired. “Obstacle, or Electro-magnetic?”
Bernard looked at her (Ford! it was Morgana Rothschild) and blushingly had to admit that he had been playing neither. Morgana stared at him with astonishment. There was an awkward silence.
Then pointedly she turned away and addressed herself to the more sporting man on her left.
“A good beginning for a Solidarity Service,” thought Bernard miserably, and foresaw for himself yet another failure to achieve atonement. If only he had given himself time to look around instead of scuttling for the nearest chair! He could have sat between Fifi Bradlaugh and Joanna Diesel. Instead of which he had gone and blindly planted himself next to Morgana. Morgana! Ford! Those black eyebrows of hers—that eyebrow, rather—for they met above the nose. Ford! And on his right was Clara Deterding. True, Clara's eyebrows didn't meet. But she was really too pneumatic. Whereas Fifi and Joanna were absolutely right. Plump, blonde, not too large…And it was that great lout, Tom Kawaguchi, who now took the seat between them.
The last arrival was Sarojini Engels.
“You're late,” said the President of the Group severely. “Don't let it happen again.”
Sarojini apologized and slid into her place between Jim Bokanovsky and Herbert Bakunin. The group was now complete, the solidarity circle perfect and without flaw. Man, woman, man, in a ring of endless alternation round the table. Twelve of them ready to be made one, waiting to come together, to be fused, to lose their twelve separate identities in a larger being.
The President stood up, made the sign of the T and, switching on the synthetic music, let loose the soft indefatigable beating of drums and a choir of instruments—near-wind and super-string—that plangently repeated and repeated the brief and unescapably haunting melody of the first Solidarity Hymn. Again, again—and it was not the ear that heard the pulsating rhythm, it was the midriff; the wail and clang of those recurring harmonies haunted, not the mind, but the yearning bowels of compassion.
The President made another sign of the T and sat down. The service had begun. The dedicated soma tablets were placed in the centre of the table. The loving cup of strawberry ice-cream soma was passed from hand to hand and, with the formula, “I drink to my annihilation,” twelve times quaffed. Then to the accompaniment of the synthetic orchestra the First Solidarity Hymn was sung.
“Ford, we are twelve; oh, make us one,
Like drops within the Social River,
Oh, make us now together run
As swiftly as thy shining Flivver.”
Twelve yearning stanzas. And then the loving cup was passed a second time. “I drink to the Greater Being” was now the formula. All drank. Tirelessly the music played. The drums beat. The crying and clashing of the harmonies were an obsession in the melted bowels. The Second Solidarity Hymn was sung.
“Come, Greater Being, Social Friend,
Annihilating Twelve-in-One!
We long to die, for when we end,
Our larger life has but begun.”
Again twelve stanzas. By this time the soma had begun to work. Eyes shone, cheeks were flushed, the inner light of universal benevolence broke out on every face in happy, friendly smiles. Even Bernard felt himself a little melted. When Morgana Rothschild turned and beamed at him, he did his best to beam back. But the eyebrow, that black two-in-one—alas, it was still there; he couldn't ignore it, couldn't, however hard he tried. The melting hadn't gone far enough. Perhaps if he had been sitting between Fifi and Joanna…For the third time the loving cup went round; “I drink to the imminence of His Coming,” said Morgana Rothschild, whose turn it happened to be to initiate the circular rite. Her tone was loud, exultant. She drank and passed the cup to Bernard. “I drink to the imminence of His Coming,” he repeated, with a sincere attempt to feel that the Coming was imminent; but the eyebrow continued to haunt him, and the Coming, so far as he was concerned, was horribly remote. He drank and handed the cup to Clara Deterding. “It'll be a failure again,” he said to himself. “I know it will.” But he went on doing his best to beam.
The loving cup had made its circuit. Lifting his hand, the President gave a signal; the chorus broke out into the Third Solidarity Hymn.
“Feel how the Greater Being comes!
Rejoice and, in rejoicings, die!
Melt in the music of the drums!
For I am you and you are I.”
As verse succeeded verse the voices thrilled with an ever intenser excitement. The sense of the Coming's imminence was like an electric tension in the air. The President switched off the music and, with the final note of the final stanza, there was absolute silence—the silence of stretched expectancy, quivering and creeping with a galvanic life. The President reached out his hand; and suddenly a Voice, a deep strong Voice, more musical than any merely human voice, richer, warmer, more vibrant with love and yearning and compassion, a wonderful, mysterious, supernatural Voice spoke from above their heads. Very slowly, “Oh, Ford, Ford, Ford,” it said diminishingly and on a descending scale. A sensation of warmth radiated thrillingly out from the solar plexus to every extremity of the bodies of those who listened; tears came into their eyes; their hearts, their bowels seemed to move within them, as though with an independent life. “Ford!” they were melting, “Ford!” dissolved, dissolved. Then, in another tone, suddenly, startlingly. “Listen!” trumpeted the voice. “Listen!” They listened. After a pause, sunk to a whisper, but a whisper, somehow, more penetrating than the loudest cry. “The feet of the Greater Being,” it went on, and repeated the words: “The feet of the Greater Being.” The whisper almost expired. “The feet of the Greater Being are on the stairs.” And once more there was silence; and the expectancy, momentarily relaxed, was stretched again, tauter, tauter, almost to the tearing point. The feet of the Greater Being—oh, they heard them, they heard them, coming softly down the stairs, coming nearer and nearer down the invisible stairs. The feet of the Greater Being. And suddenly the tearing point was reached. Her eyes staring, her lips parted. Morgana Rothschild sprang to her feet.
“I hear him,” she cried. “I hear him.”
“He's coming,” shouted Sarojini Engels.
“Yes, he's coming, I hear him.” Fifi Bradlaugh and Tom Kawaguchi rose simultaneously to their feet.
“Oh, oh, oh!” Joanna inarticulately testified.
“He's coming!” yelled Jim Bokanovsky.
The President leaned forward and, with a touch, released a delirium of cymbals and blown brass, a fever of tom-tomming.
“Oh, he's coming!” screamed Clara Deterding. “Aie!” and it was as though she were having her throat cut.
Feeling that it was time for him to do something, Bernard also jumped up and shouted: “I hear him; He's coming.” But it wasn't true. He heard nothing and, for him, nobody was coming. Nobody—in spite of the music, in spite of the mounting excitement. But he waved his arms, he shouted with the best of them; and when the others began to jig and stamp and shuffle, he also jigged and shuffled.
Round they went, a circular procession of dancers, each with hands on the hips of the dancer preceding, round and round, shouting in unison, stamping to the rhythm of the music with their feet, beating it, beating it out with hands on the buttocks in front; twelve pairs of hands beating as one; as one, twelve buttocks slabbily resounding. Twelve as one, twelve as one. “I hear him, I hear him coming.” The music quickened; faster beat the feet, faster, faster fell the rhythmic hands. And all at once a great synthetic bass boomed out the words which announced the approaching atonement and final consummation of solidarity, the coming of the Twelve-in-One, the incarnation of the Greater Being. “Orgy-porgy,” it sang, while the tom-toms continued to beat their feverish tattoo:
“Orgy-porgy, Ford and fun,
Kiss the girls and make them One.
Boys at One with girls at peace;
Orgy-porgy gives release.”
“Orgy-porgy,” the dancers caught up the liturgical refrain, “Orgy-porgy, Ford and fun, kiss the girls…” And as they sang, the lights began slowly to fade—to fade and at the same time to grow warmer, richer, redder, until at last they were dancing in the crimson twilight of an Embryo Store. “Orgy-porgy…” In their blood-coloured and foetal darkness the dancers continued for a while to circulate, to beat and beat out the indefatigable rhythm. “Orgy-porgy…” Then the circle wavered, broke, fell in partial disintegration on the ring of couches which surrounded—circle enclosing circle—the table and its planetary chairs. “Orgy-porgy…” Tenderly the deep Voice crooned and cooed; in the red twilight it was as though some enormous negro dove were hovering benevolently over the now prone or supine dancers.
They were standing on the roof; Big Henry had just sung eleven. The night was calm and warm.
“Wasn't it wonderful?” said Fifi Bradlaugh. “Wasn't it simply wonderful?” She looked at Bernard with an expression of rapture, but of rapture in which there was no trace of agitation or excitement—for to be excited is still to be unsatisfied. Hers was the calm ecstasy of achieved consummation, the peace, not of mere vacant satiety and nothingness, but of balanced life, of energies at rest and in equilibrium. A rich and living peace. For the Solidarity Service had given as well as taken, drawn off only to replenish. She was full, she was made perfect, she was still more than merely herself. “Didn't you think it was wonderful?” she insisted, looking into Bernard's face with those supernaturally shining eyes.
“Yes, I thought it was wonderful,” he lied and looked away; the sight of her transfigured face was at once an accusation and an ironical reminder of his own separateness. He was as miserably isolated now as he had been when the service began—more isolated by reason of his unreplenished emptiness, his dead satiety. Separate and unatoned, while the others were being fused into the Greater Being; alone even in Morgana's embrace—much more alone, indeed, more hopelessly himself than he had ever been in his life before. He had emerged from that crimson twilight into the common electric glare with a self-consciousness intensified to the pitch of agony. He was utterly miserable, and perhaps (her shining eyes accused him), perhaps it was his own fault. “Quite wonderful,” he repeated; but the only thing he could think of was Morgana's eyebrow.
1
到八點(diǎn)鐘的時(shí)候,天空慢慢暗下來了。斯托克波吉斯俱樂部塔樓里的擴(kuò)音器開始廣播要關(guān)閉球場了,那聲音是人類不可能發(fā)出的男高音。列寧娜和亨利停止打球,走回俱樂部。從內(nèi)分泌和外分泌托拉斯的場地上,傳來了成千上萬頭奶牛的哞哞叫聲,這些牛群為法恩海姆皇家工廠提供原材料,即荷爾蒙和牛奶。
暮色中,到處都是直升機(jī)不間斷的轟鳴聲。每兩分半鐘,一聲鈴響和哨聲就宣告一列輕型單軌火車的出發(fā),這些火車將低種姓的高爾夫球手們從各自的球場運(yùn)回城市。
列寧娜和亨利爬進(jìn)飛機(jī),出發(fā)了。在八百米的高空,亨利將螺旋槳的轉(zhuǎn)速降低,有那么一兩分鐘,他們似乎懸停在空中,下面是漸漸暗淡的風(fēng)景。伯恩海姆的樺樹林就像一潭黑色的大水池,一直延伸向西方天空的明亮邊緣。天際線變得紅彤彤的,落日最后的余暉漸漸淡下去了,先是橙紅色,之后變成黃色,再稍后是水汪汪的淡綠色。向北望去,比樹林更高更遠(yuǎn)的地方,是內(nèi)分泌和外分泌工廠,二十層樓的每個(gè)窗戶都燈火通明。下面是高爾夫俱樂部的大樓——低種姓人的營房般的巨大建筑,分隔墻的另一邊,是留給阿爾法和貝塔成員的較小的房子。那些低種姓的人正走在通往單軌火車站的路上,黑壓壓的,如螞蟻一般。一列閃著燈光的火車從車站的玻璃頂棚下面疾馳而出。順著火車在黑暗的平原上向東南方向的行駛路線,他們兩個(gè)人的目光不禁被斯勞火葬場的龐大建筑吸引住了。為了這些夜行飛機(jī)的安全著想,火葬場的四個(gè)高高的煙囪都打開了探照燈,點(diǎn)亮了紫紅色的警示信號(hào)。這是一個(gè)地標(biāo)。
“為什么那些煙囪旁邊都有像陽臺(tái)那樣的東西?”列寧娜問道。
“磷回收。”亨利簡單地解釋,“在沿著煙囪上升的過程中,氣體會(huì)經(jīng)歷四種不同的工序。過去,每次焚化死人的時(shí)候,五氧化二磷都流失了?,F(xiàn)在,他們可以回收其中的百分之九十八。每具成年人的尸體可以回收一千五百多克磷,這樣,僅僅在英格蘭,每年就可以回收將近四百噸的磷。”亨利說話的時(shí)候既高興又得意,全心全意地為這個(gè)成就感到高興,好像這全是他個(gè)人創(chuàng)造的成就,“想想我們死后還能為社會(huì)所用,真是開心呀,能夠幫助植物生長。”
這時(shí),列寧娜的眼睛已經(jīng)移向別處了,她正在垂直向下俯瞰單軌火車站。“確實(shí)開心,”她表示同意,“可奇怪的是,阿爾法和貝塔并不比下面那些丑陋矮小的伽馬、德爾塔和艾普西隆更能幫助植物生長呀。”
“所有人在生理和化學(xué)成分上都是平等的。”亨利簡潔地說,“另外,即使是艾普西隆們也做著不可或缺的貢獻(xiàn)。”
“即使是一個(gè)艾普西隆……”列寧娜突然記起,有一次,那時(shí)她還是個(gè)小女孩,還在學(xué)校讀書,睡到半夜她醒來了,第一次意識(shí)到那些睡覺時(shí)一直縈繞在她耳邊的竊竊私語。她眼前再次浮現(xiàn)出那道月光、那排白色的小床;耳邊再次響起那個(gè)輕柔的聲音(那些話就在那里,清清楚楚,難以忘卻,重復(fù)了那么多個(gè)夜晚):“每個(gè)人都為別人工作。我們離不開任何人。即使是艾普西隆也有用。我們離不開艾普西隆們。每個(gè)人都為別人工作。我們離開別人是不行的……”列寧娜回想起當(dāng)時(shí)的恐懼和驚訝,在醒著的半個(gè)小時(shí)里她有種種猜測,然后,聽著那沒完沒了的重復(fù),她的心情逐漸平復(fù),平復(fù),平復(fù),然后睡眠悄然來臨……
“我想,艾普西隆們不太介意自己是艾普西隆吧。”她說。
“當(dāng)然不介意了。怎么可能介意呢?他們又不知道作為其他種姓的人會(huì)是什么樣。當(dāng)然,我們會(huì)介意的,但那是因?yàn)槲覀兯艿降臈l件訓(xùn)練不同。并且,我們的遺傳從一開始就和他們不一樣。”
“我很高興我不是艾普西隆。”列寧娜肯定地說。
“如果你是艾普西隆的話,”亨利說,“你所受的訓(xùn)練會(huì)讓你同樣心懷感激的,你會(huì)因?yàn)椴皇前柗ɑ蜇愃械礁吲d。”他將前進(jìn)的推進(jìn)器掛上擋,駕駛飛機(jī)朝倫敦飛去。在他們身后,在西方,天空中的深紅色和橙紅色幾乎全部消逝了,暗黑的厚重云團(tuán)爬向了天際。他們飛過火葬場的時(shí)候,從煙囪里冒出的熱氣流令飛機(jī)陡然上升,過了這里,飛到遠(yuǎn)處下沉的冷空氣里后,飛機(jī)才突然下降。
“多么奇妙的顛簸起伏!”列寧娜開心地笑了。
但是,亨利的語氣一度還是有點(diǎn)傷感。“你知道剛才那個(gè)起伏意味著什么嗎?”他說,“那就是說,某個(gè)人最終消失了,確確實(shí)實(shí)地消失了,隨著一股熱氣升上去了。我都有點(diǎn)好奇,想知道那是誰,是男人還是女人,是阿爾法還是艾普西隆……”他嘆口氣,然后,他果斷地?fù)Q上了快活的語氣,“無論怎樣,”他總結(jié)道,“有一件事,我們是肯定的,不管他是誰,他活著的時(shí)候都很幸?!,F(xiàn)在每個(gè)人都很幸福。”
“是的,現(xiàn)在每個(gè)人都很幸福。”列寧娜應(yīng)和著。連續(xù)十二年,他們每天晚上都聽到這句話,每次重復(fù)一百五十遍。
他們降落在威斯敏斯特區(qū)亨利居住的一座四十層公寓樓的樓頂上,然后直接去了餐廳。在餐廳,和一大群喧鬧快活的人一起,他們吃了一頓豐盛的晚餐。隨咖啡一起端上來的還有唆麻。列寧娜吃了兩個(gè)半克的藥片,亨利吃了三個(gè)。九點(diǎn)二十分,他們穿過街道,來到新開張的威斯敏斯特歌舞廳。這是個(gè)幾乎無云的夜晚,天空中看不見月亮,只有點(diǎn)點(diǎn)星光。不過,幸好列寧娜和亨利兩人都沒有注意到這個(gè)有點(diǎn)令人壓抑的情景。高空的電子燈光標(biāo)示牌有效地遮住了外界的黑暗。“卡爾文·斯托普和他的十六位色克斯管演奏員(1)共同登臺(tái)。”在新威斯敏斯特歌舞廳的門面上,巨大的字母閃耀著誘人的光:“倫敦最好的色香樂隊(duì);最新的合成音樂。”
他倆走了進(jìn)去。里面的空氣很熱,并且因?yàn)辇埾严愫吞聪阆銡獾木壒剩悬c(diǎn)讓人透不過氣來。在大廳圓拱形的天花板上,配色機(jī)已經(jīng)繪制了一幅熱帶的日落圖。十六位色克斯管演奏員正在吹奏一支喜聞樂見的老曲子:“世界上沒有一個(gè)瓶子,比得上我那個(gè)可愛的小瓶子。”四百對舞伴正在锃亮的地板上跳著五步舞,列寧娜和亨利很快就加入,成為第四百零一對。色克斯管嗚咽著,如同月光下貓咪在動(dòng)聽地吟唱著,女低音部和男高音部也在呻吟著,好像他們在經(jīng)歷著一次小小的死亡。在豐富的和聲伴奏下,他們顫抖的合唱聲逐漸升高,達(dá)到高潮,聲音愈來愈大,直到最后,隨著樂隊(duì)指揮一揮手,頓時(shí),從空中傳來這仙樂的橫掃一切的最后余音,將十六個(gè)人世間的樂手幾乎吹到九霄云外。A降調(diào)如雷鳴般地怒吼,之后在幾乎完全的寂靜中,在幾乎完全的黑暗中,聲音似乎變得透明了起來,一絲一絲地逐漸減弱,下滑,以四分音的梯級(jí),減弱,下滑,最后,主旋律變成一種微弱的私語(背景中依然搏動(dòng)著五四拍的節(jié)奏)縈繞其間,把一種強(qiáng)烈的期盼賦予了那片刻的黑暗。終于,這期盼得到了滿足。突然,爆炸般地,旭日高升,同時(shí),十六人樂隊(duì)開始放聲高歌:
“我的瓶子哦,你是我長久以來的企盼!
我的瓶子,為什么要把我換瓶?
在你的懷里,天空是那么蔚藍(lán),
天上永遠(yuǎn)是陽光燦爛;
世界上沒有一個(gè)瓶子哦,
能比我的那個(gè)更可愛、更完美。”
列寧娜和亨利與另外四百對舞伴一起,圍著威斯敏斯特歌舞廳在跳五步舞,但是,他們二人同時(shí)也在另一個(gè)世界里轉(zhuǎn)著,轉(zhuǎn)著,那是個(gè)溫暖的、色彩斑斕的世界,是唆麻假日里那個(gè)無限友好的世界。人們都多么善良,多么好看,多么有趣?。?ldquo;我的瓶子哦,你是我長久以來的企盼……”但是,列寧娜和亨利已經(jīng)擁有了他們所期盼的東西……他們就在瓶子的懷抱里呢,就在此時(shí)此刻,在明媚的天氣和永遠(yuǎn)蔚藍(lán)的天空下,一起安全地待在他們的瓶子里。當(dāng)十六人樂隊(duì)最后精疲力竭,放下色克斯管后,合成音樂器還在播放著最新的悠緩的馬爾薩斯布魯斯。他們二人簡直就像兩個(gè)同卵雙胞胎的胚胎,互相擁抱著,一起在代血漿大海的浪濤中輕輕搖蕩著。
“晚安,親愛的朋友們。晚安,親愛的朋友們。”擴(kuò)音器里傳出親切悅耳的聲音,這禮貌掩蓋著命令,“晚安,親愛的朋友們……”與其他人一樣,列寧娜和亨利順從地離開了大樓。令人壓抑的星星已經(jīng)在天際走了一大段路,但是,雖然空中那些阻隔視野的招牌大多已經(jīng)消失了,兩個(gè)年輕人依然高高興興,絲毫沒有意識(shí)到身處暗夜。
還差半個(gè)小時(shí)到關(guān)門時(shí)間時(shí),他倆又吞服了第二劑唆麻,對二人來說,在現(xiàn)實(shí)世界和腦中的虛幻世界之間,唆麻豎起了一道不可逾越的高墻。猶如身處瓶子的懷抱,他倆穿過街道;猶如身處瓶子的懷抱,他倆搭乘電梯來到亨利位于二十八層的公寓。可是,盡管列寧娜依然處在瓶子的懷抱中,盡管她第二次服用了唆麻,她也沒有忘記按照規(guī)定必須要采取的所有避孕措施。多年密集的睡眠教育,從十二歲到十七歲,每周三次的馬爾薩斯操練,讓采取這些措施幾乎成為某種自動(dòng)的、不可避免的程序,就像眨眼睛一樣。
“哦,這提醒我了,”她從衛(wèi)生間回來后說,“范妮·克朗想知道,你送給我的這種可愛的綠色代摩洛哥皮革的腰帶,是從哪里買到的?”
2
隔周的周四是伯納德參加團(tuán)結(jié)禮拜儀式的日子。在“愛神之家”(按照第二條規(guī)則,赫爾姆霍茨剛剛?cè)脒x其委員會(huì))早早吃了晚飯后,他同朋友道了別,在樓頂叫了架出租飛機(jī),告訴飛行員他要去福帝森社區(qū)唱堂(2)。飛機(jī)上升了幾百米,然后向東飛行,拐過彎后,浮現(xiàn)在伯納德眼前的恢宏壯麗的建筑就是會(huì)堂了。會(huì)堂燈光如熾,高達(dá)三百二十米的白色代大理石建筑閃閃發(fā)光,將路德蓋特山上映照得一片雪白;在樓頂直升機(jī)平臺(tái)的四個(gè)角上,各擺放著一塊巨大的T字形石頭,在黑夜中閃耀著深紅色的光;二十四個(gè)金色大喇叭鳴奏著莊嚴(yán)的合成音樂。
“倒霉,來晚了。”伯納德第一眼看到會(huì)堂的大亨利鐘(3)時(shí),心里想。確實(shí),他還在付出租飛機(jī)錢時(shí),大亨利鐘就敲響了。“福帝,”所有的金色喇叭里傳出了洪亮的低音,“福帝,福帝,福帝……”連著鳴響九次。伯納德向電梯跑去。
大樓的底層是一個(gè)寬敞的禮堂,可以舉行福帝日慶?;顒?dòng)和其他群眾性社區(qū)歌唱活動(dòng)。上面的每一層都各有一百個(gè)房間,總共有七千個(gè)房間,供團(tuán)結(jié)小組做每兩周一次的禮拜儀式。伯納德下降到第三十三層,匆匆跑過走廊,站在3210房間門口,猶豫了一會(huì)兒,然后,他鼓足勇氣,推開門走了進(jìn)去。
感謝福帝!他不是最后一個(gè)到的。擺放在圓桌周圍的十二把椅子有三把還空著。他溜到最近的一把椅子上坐下,盡量不引起他人的注意,同時(shí)準(zhǔn)備好沖著來得更晚的人皺眉頭,不管那兩人是誰。
他左邊的女孩轉(zhuǎn)過身來。“你今天下午玩什么了?”她問他,“障礙高爾夫還是電磁高爾夫?”
伯納德看看她(福帝呀!是摩根娜·羅斯柴爾德),紅著臉,告訴她,自己兩種都沒有玩。摩根娜吃驚地盯著他。一陣尷尬的沉默。
然后,她突然轉(zhuǎn)過身去,跟她左邊那個(gè)更喜歡運(yùn)動(dòng)的男子聊天去了。
“這個(gè)團(tuán)結(jié)禮拜儀式可真是開了個(gè)好頭啊。”伯納德痛苦地想,預(yù)見到自己實(shí)現(xiàn)救贖的努力會(huì)再次失敗。如果他在溜到最近的椅子上之前,先看一眼就好了!他本可以坐在菲菲·布萊德拉夫和瓊娜·迪塞爾之間的,可他卻糊里糊涂地把自己杵在了摩根娜旁邊。摩根娜!福帝呀!她那兩道粗黑的眉頭,確切地說,那一道眉毛,因?yàn)樗拿碱^在鼻子上方幾乎連到了一起。福帝!他的右邊是克拉拉·德特丁。必須承認(rèn),克拉拉的眉毛沒有長到一起,可是,她的胸脯也太豐滿了點(diǎn)吧。而菲菲和瓊娜都絕對剛剛好:豐滿,金發(fā),個(gè)頭不太大……現(xiàn)在,那個(gè)大笨蛋,湯姆·川口,坐在了她倆中間的椅子上。
最后到的是撒柔吉尼·恩格斯。
“你遲到了,”小組長嚴(yán)厲地說,“以后不能再這樣了。”撒柔吉尼道著歉,溜進(jìn)了吉姆·波卡諾夫斯基和赫伯特·巴庫寧中間的座位。本小組的人都來齊了,團(tuán)結(jié)圈兒圓滿了,完美無缺。男人,女人,男人,不斷地互相交替,圍著桌子繞成圓圈。十二個(gè)人都準(zhǔn)備著,要與大家合為一體,等待著連接在一起,融合到一起,在更大的生命中失去各自不同的個(gè)體身份。
組長站了起來,劃了個(gè)T字,打開合成音樂,播放出輕柔、不知疲倦的鼓點(diǎn)和各種樂器的合奏,既有管樂,也有弦樂,一遍遍地重復(fù)著第一首團(tuán)結(jié)贊美詩那簡潔的旋律。洪亮、不可逃避的聲音縈繞著,縈繞著,一遍,又一遍,聽到這搏動(dòng)的聲音的并不是耳朵,而是下腹部;這重復(fù)來重復(fù)去的和鳴,各種嗚嗚聲和叮當(dāng)聲,纏繞的不是頭腦,而是渴望同情的五臟六腑。
組長又劃了個(gè)T字,坐下了。儀式開始了。捐獻(xiàn)的唆麻片放在了桌子中間。草莓冰激凌味的唆麻愛之杯,從一個(gè)人的手上傳遞到下一個(gè)人的手上,大家嘴上念叨著祈禱語“我為我的消失而干杯”,十二次的痛飲。之后,在合成管弦樂的伴奏下,大家唱起了第一首團(tuán)結(jié)贊美詩。
“福帝,我們是十二個(gè);
哦,讓我們成為一體吧,
成為社會(huì)之河中的水滴,
哦,讓我們一起跑吧,
快得像您那閃亮的轎車。”
十二段充滿渴望的詩節(jié)。愛之杯再次傳遞一圈。“我為更偉大的生命而干杯”是這次的祈禱語。所有人都喝了。音樂依舊不知疲倦地演奏著,鼓點(diǎn)響著,嗚嗚嗚,叮叮當(dāng),樂器的和鳴聲纏繞回響,幾乎要將五臟六腑融化掉。大家唱起了第二首團(tuán)結(jié)贊美詩。
“來吧,更偉大的生命,社會(huì)之友,
毀滅十二個(gè),合成為一個(gè)!
我們渴望消亡,只有那時(shí),
我們的大我才能生成。”
還是十二個(gè)詩節(jié)。此時(shí),唆麻開始顯效了。眼睛發(fā)亮了,臉蛋變紅了,內(nèi)心的博愛之光照亮了每個(gè)人的臉頰,每個(gè)人的臉上都洋溢著幸福、友好的微笑。就連伯納德都覺得自己有點(diǎn)融化了。當(dāng)摩根娜·羅斯柴爾德扭過臉沖著他微笑時(shí),他也盡力報(bào)以微笑。但是,那道眉毛,那道合二為一的黑眉毛,哎呀,還在那里,他無法忽視它的存在,再怎么努力都做不到。融化的程度還不夠。如果他坐在菲菲和瓊娜中間的話,可能……愛之杯第三次開始傳遞了,“我為他即將來臨而干杯。”摩根娜·羅斯柴爾德說,這次輪到她啟動(dòng)這個(gè)圓圈儀式。她的聲音高亢興奮。她一番痛飲,把杯子遞給伯納德。“我為他即將來臨而干杯。”伯納德重復(fù)一遍,真心地希望能夠感覺到“他”馬上就要來臨,可是,那道眉毛還是糾纏著他,對他而言,那個(gè)偉大的來臨還遙遠(yuǎn)得可怕呢。他喝了之后,將杯子傳給克拉拉·德特丁。“這次又失敗了。”他自言自語,“我就知道會(huì)這樣的。”但是,他仍然盡可能地微笑著。愛之杯又傳了一圈。組長舉起一只手,發(fā)出信號(hào),合唱爆發(fā)為第三首團(tuán)結(jié)贊美詩。
“感受吧,更偉大的生命到來了!
歡樂吧,在歡樂中消逝!
融化在鼓點(diǎn)的音樂中!
我就是你,你就是我。”
一首詩接著一首詩,隨著大家越來越激動(dòng),聲音開始顫抖。偉大生命即將降臨之感充斥在空氣中,如同充了電一般刺激、緊張。組長關(guān)掉音樂,隨著最后一段的最后一個(gè)音符消失,出現(xiàn)了絕對的寂靜,過度期待造成的寂靜,它戰(zhàn)栗著,爬行著,如同帶了電的生命。組長伸出一只手,突然,一個(gè)聲音,一個(gè)深沉洪亮的聲音,比人類的任何聲音都更悅耳、更豐富、更溫暖的聲音,因?yàn)閻?、渴望和同情而顫抖的聲音,一個(gè)美妙、神秘、超自然的聲音,在他們上方說話了,非常緩慢地:“哦,福帝,福帝,福帝。”聲音逐漸減弱,聲調(diào)逐漸降低。聽到這聲音的人們頓時(shí)激動(dòng)萬分,感覺到一股溫暖從太陽穴輻射到身體的每個(gè)角落。淚水涌入他們的眼睛,他們的心、他們的五臟六腑似乎都在涌動(dòng),如同擁有了獨(dú)立的生命。“福帝哦!”他們在融化,“福帝!”他們?nèi)诨?,消失了。然后,令人吃驚地,這聲音突然換了一種語氣:“聽!”聲音如同喇叭。“聽!”他們聆聽著。停頓了一會(huì)兒后,聲音降為細(xì)語,但不知怎么回事,這細(xì)語卻比最高亢的呼喊更具有穿透力。“更偉大的生命的腳步聲。”聲音繼續(xù)著,重復(fù)著,“更偉大的生命的腳步聲。”細(xì)語聲幾乎聽不見了,“樓梯上響起了更偉大的生命的腳步聲。”再一次的沉寂,剛剛松懈了一點(diǎn)的期待又一次繃緊了,越來越緊,幾乎到了崩潰的邊緣。更偉大的生命的腳步聲,哦,他們聽到了,他們聽見了,輕輕地沿樓梯走下來了,沿著看不見的樓梯,“他”越走越近了。更偉大的生命的腳步聲。突然,崩潰的一刻到來了。摩根娜·羅斯柴爾德跳了起來,眼睛瞪著,嘴巴大張著。
“我聽見他了,”她喊道,“我聽見他了。”
“他來了。”撒柔吉尼·恩格斯喊叫著。
“是的,他來了,我聽見了。”菲菲·布萊德拉夫和湯姆·川口同時(shí)站了起來。
“哦,哦,哦!”瓊娜含混不清地作證。
“他來了!”吉姆·波卡諾夫斯基大叫。
組長身體前傾,輕輕一按開關(guān),頓時(shí)響起镲鈸和銅管樂發(fā)燒般的囈語,一陣咚咚咚、鏘鏘鏘。
“哦,他來了!”克拉拉·德特丁尖叫起來,“啊咿!”好像有人在割她的喉嚨。
伯納德感到他也該做點(diǎn)什么,于是跳了起來,喊叫著:“我聽見他了,他來了。”這不是真話。他什么都沒有聽到,對他而言,誰都沒有來。沒有人,盡管音樂轟鳴,盡管周圍的人越來越興奮。但是,他揮舞著手臂,和他們中最激動(dòng)的人一起喊叫著??吹狡渌碎_始搖擺、跺腳、拖著步子跳起舞來,他也開始跟著搖擺跳舞。
他們轉(zhuǎn)著圈跳著,圍成了一個(gè)圈,每個(gè)人都把雙手放在前面一個(gè)跳舞者的腰胯部,一圈又一圈,一起喊叫著,隨著音樂的節(jié)奏,他們跺著腳,雙手拍打著前面人的屁股。十二個(gè)人的手同時(shí)在拍打,猶如一個(gè)人;十二個(gè)屁股拍得啪啪作響,十二個(gè)人合為一人,十二合一。“我聽見他了,我聽見他來了。”音樂節(jié)奏加快了,跺腳更快了,加快,加快,敲擊節(jié)奏的手也加快了。突然,傳來一個(gè)響亮的合成低音,宣布救贖的到來,社會(huì)團(tuán)結(jié)的實(shí)現(xiàn),十二合一的到來,以及更偉大的生命的現(xiàn)身。“狂歡吧,狂歡吧。”這聲音唱著,咚咚的鼓點(diǎn)繼續(xù)敲打出狂熱的節(jié)奏。
“狂歡吧,福帝呀,玩樂吧,
親吻姑娘吧,合二為一;
小伙姑娘合二為一,
一切才能安寧;
狂歡吧,釋放吧。”
“狂歡吧,”跳舞的人跟著這祈禱詞般的疊句唱了起來,“狂歡吧,福帝呀,玩樂吧,親吻姑娘吧……”他們唱著唱著,燈光逐漸暗下來,暗下來,同時(shí),燈光變暖了,變得更豐富,也更紅了,最后,他們幾乎是在胚胎庫里那種朦朧的暗紅色中舞蹈了。“狂歡吧……”舞蹈者在胚胎庫里那種血紅色的黑暗中又繼續(xù)轉(zhuǎn)了一會(huì)兒,擊打著,不知疲倦地?fù)舸蛑?jié)奏。“狂歡吧……”然后,圓圈漸漸動(dòng)搖了,散開了,人們兩兩一起躺倒在四周圍成一圈的長沙發(fā)上,長沙發(fā)將圓桌和椅子套在中間,一圈套一圈。“狂歡吧……”那個(gè)低沉的聲音溫柔地低吟著,輕唱著,在朦朧的暗紅色中,好像有只巨大的黑鴿子正在此刻顛鸞倒鳳的這些人上空盤旋著,愛意綿綿。
他們站在樓頂上,大亨利鐘剛剛敲過十一點(diǎn)。夜是平靜的、溫暖的。
“剛才多么美妙啊,不是嗎?”菲菲·布萊德拉夫說,“多么美妙??!”她望著伯納德,一臉的狂喜,這種狂喜里沒有一丁點(diǎn)激動(dòng)或興奮的痕跡,因?yàn)榕d奮是不滿足的表現(xiàn)。她的狂喜是心滿意足后的狂喜,是平靜的狂喜。她獲得的安寧,不僅出于空洞的滿足和滿足后的無聊,而且是來自平衡的生命,來自安寧和平衡的精力,這是豐富、生動(dòng)的安寧。團(tuán)結(jié)禮拜儀式不僅索取,而且給予,取走就是為了補(bǔ)充。她完整了,完美了,不再僅僅是她自己。“難道你不認(rèn)為剛才非常美妙嗎?”她還在追問,看著伯納德的臉,眼睛亮得出奇。
“是啊,我覺得非常美妙。”他在撒謊,眼睛望向了別處。對他而言,她那張容光煥發(fā)的臉既是對他的指責(zé),又是頗具諷刺性的提醒,提醒著他的與眾不同。此刻,他和儀式剛開始的時(shí)候沒有什么兩樣,依然是那么悲慘,那么孤立,或者說,因?yàn)樗俏吹玫綕M足的空虛,或者說他那死板的滿足,他感到更加孤立了。當(dāng)其他人都已融入那更偉大的生命時(shí),他仍然是孤立的,未得到救贖,即使在摩根娜的懷抱中,他也是孤獨(dú)的,或者說更加孤獨(dú)了,確實(shí)如此,感覺比他生命中的任何時(shí)刻都更加孤獨(dú)無望。當(dāng)他從那朦朧的暗紅色中醒來,再次為普通電燈照耀時(shí),他越發(fā)地意識(shí)到自我的存在,這令他痛苦難耐。他難受極了,或許(她閃閃發(fā)亮的眼睛在指責(zé)他),這全是他自己的錯(cuò)。“太美妙了。”他重復(fù)了一遍,但是,他能回憶起來的只有摩根娜的那道眉毛。
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(1) sexophonist,作者模仿saxophonist(薩克斯管演奏者)造的詞。
(2) singery,這里模仿教堂譯成“唱堂”。
(3) Big Henry,模仿倫敦的Big Ben(大本鐘),翻譯成“大亨利鐘”。
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