18.2 句子的一致(Sentence Unity)
18.2A 句子一致的含義
1) 一致性是指句子所表示的思想是一個完整的統(tǒng)一體。例如:
Jane sat down, picked up her pen and started to write her composition:
“I got up early. Mom told me that there was always traffic jam and our car was a little bit too old and we need buy a new one.”
例中Jane的作文的開頭兩句話就不夠一致:第一句意思欠完整,需補上動作發(fā)生的時間;第二句所表示的思想不統(tǒng)一,因為沒有講明兩個分句之間的聯(lián)系,也同第一句割裂,故它們沒有形成一個完整的統(tǒng)一體。
2) 一致性是對句子結(jié)構(gòu)的首要要求,全句使用的詞語都要緊密地圍繞一個中心思想,凡未達到這項要求的句子都應(yīng)改寫。例如對上面例子中那個學生的作文可作必要的增刪:
“I got up early Monday morning. Mom told me that there was always heavy traffic, and as our car was a bit old and couldn't run fast, we'd better start earlier.”
18.2B 對缺乏一致性句子的兩種處理方法
1) 為了取得句子的一致性,對句中與中心思想無關(guān)的內(nèi)容應(yīng)加刪減。例如:
Parking space on the compass, which is one of the most beautiful in the state, has become completely inadequate, and recently the city council voted to increase bus fares again.
此句的中心內(nèi)容是講停車場已經(jīng)非常緊張,市府決定再次提高公共汽車費,勢必使更多的人用私人汽車,從而加劇停車場緊張的局面。由于which引導的從句同本句中心內(nèi)容無關(guān),故應(yīng)刪去。
2) 對于結(jié)構(gòu)過于松散,未能明白地表示中心思想的句子應(yīng)加以改寫。例如:
I worry about whether I will get a job, and I am convinced that new opportunities will open up before the end of spring.
上例中的兩個分句由逗號and連接,形式上是一個完整的句子,但實際上兩個分句之間并未形成有機的連接,中心思想未得到明確的表述,為此應(yīng)當改寫。一種辦法是把并列分句改為主從分句:
I worry about whether I will get a job, though I am convinced that new opportunities will open up before the end of spring.
也可以再增加一個分句,從而使全句的中心思想明白地表現(xiàn)出來:
I worry about whether I will get a job. Although I am convinced that new opportunities will open up before the end of spring, I still can't help being anxious about my prospects.