The guy who seems like an emotionless robot is you... but your relationship with Amy is causing you to transform into a red blooded man with sexual desires.
That is literally the stupidest thing I've ever heard.Leonard?Leonard.Leonard?What?
Are you sleeping? I was. Now I'm having a nightmare.
What do you want? Never mind. I still can't tell you.Penny? Penny?
Penny. Oh, my God. Sheldon? You frightened me.
佩妮,上帝啊,謝爾頓,你嚇?biāo)牢伊?/div>
What are you doing in my bedroom?
你在我臥室干嘛
Yeah, well, I knocked on the front door, but you didn't hear it.
我剛有敲過大門啊可你沒聽見
How did you even get in, you weirdo? Yeah, really?
你是怎么進來的,你個怪胎是嗎?
I've seen strange men traipsing in and out of here for years,but when I do it, it's weird?
多年來不斷有陌生男人進出你家.可當(dāng)是我時,就奇怪了
What do you want, Sheldon?
你要干嘛,謝爾頓
Oh, I was having a little trouble sleeping and I just thought, uh, seeing as you're up, we could talk.
我有一點點睡不著然后我就想反正你醒了,我們來聊聊吧
Talk about what? Oh, I don't know.
聊什么不知道耶
Uh, weather, uh, fish you could do carpentry with.
天氣 可以拿來做木工活的魚類
Why Leonard is such an attractive and desirable boyfriend.
為什么萊納德是一個這么迷人又稱心的男友
Yeah, pick one your choice. Sheldon.
你選一個由你做主,謝爾頓
Did you know that Leonard has a perfect driving record and enjoys the insurance discounts that go along with that? Hubbahubba.
你知道萊納德的駕駛記錄超完美因此能享受到車險打折這件事嗎?很棒吧
Okay, go home, crazy man. Yeah.Did you know that while Leonard is not considered a tall fellow in our country,in today's North Korea, he's downright average.
好吧,快回家。你個瘋子,對了,你知不知道雖然萊納德在我們國家不算高大但在今日的朝鮮 他絕對是標(biāo)準(zhǔn)身高
Talk about a keeper.Okay, what did Amy tell you? Oh, very well.
正所謂乘龍佳婿?。亢冒?,艾米跟你說什么了,太棒了
I can't keep up this clever charade any longer.
你再不猜出來我也編不出提示了。
She told me that you were thinking of ending it with Leonard.
她告訴我你想跟萊納德分手
Okay, you listen to me.
好吧 你聽我說
I think it's really sweet you're trying to protect your friend,but this is none of your business. Got it?
你想保護你朋友的做法真的很有愛但這不關(guān)你的事,明白了嗎?
Excuse me. This is not about protecting my friend.
糾正一下 這不是為了保護我的朋友
I'm a big fan of homeostasis.
我是喜歡內(nèi)穩(wěn)態(tài)
Do you know what that is?
你知道這是什么意思嗎
Of course not. Yeah.
當(dāng)然不知道,好吧
Homeostasis refers to a system's ability to regulate its internal environment and maintain a constant condition of properties like temperature or pH.
內(nèi)穩(wěn)態(tài)是指一個系統(tǒng)調(diào)節(jié)自身內(nèi)部系統(tǒng)的能力并維持其屬性在一個常規(guī)的狀態(tài)下就好像溫度或酸堿度
Worst bedtime story ever.
史上最爛的床邊故事
My point is I don't like when things change.
我想說的是我不喜歡事物發(fā)生變化
So, regardless of your feelings,I would like you to continue dating Leonard.
所以無論你心里想什么我希望你能跟萊納德保持現(xiàn)狀
And also,while we're on the subject, you recently changed your shampoo.
還有說到改變,你最近換了不同味的洗發(fā)精
I'm not comfortable with the new scent.
我不喜歡這個新香味
Please stop this madness and go back to green apple.
麻煩別瞎換,用回青蘋果味的
Okay, honey, I have a lot to figure out,and until I do, you are not to say a word to Leonard.
好吧。寶貝,我有很多事情琢磨但在我想清之前,你不許告訴萊納德一個字
Do you understand? I do.You clear on the shampoo issue? Get out.
明白了嗎?明白。那洗發(fā)精的事情你明白了嗎?快滾
Penny? What? Please don't hurt my friend.
佩妮,干嘛?拜托不要傷害我的朋友
That is the last thing I want to do. Thank you.
這是我最不想做的事情。謝謝
Coconut? What were you thinking?Are you a hula girl? Get out!
椰子味,你想什么呢?你又不是跳草裙舞的,快滾回家
Hello? What the hell is wrong with you? You told Sheldon?
你好?你是怎么想的 居然告訴謝爾頓
Do you know what a terrible position this puts me in?
你知道你把我置于一個多糟糕的處境嗎
Hang on, please.Hello?
等下,你好
Yeah, just a headsup: Penny knows that you blabbed about Leonard.She's pretty mad.
提醒你一下佩妮知道你泄露了關(guān)于萊納德的事她氣瘋了
I know.She's yelling at me right now.
我知道,她現(xiàn)在打電話嚷我呢
All right then, so we're all on the same page.Yeah.Hey, Bernie.
好吧,你都知情了就好,好啦,小妮妮
There's my hubby. How's everything going up there?
我的老公仔,在上面一切還好嗎
Oh, it's okay.Space is beautiful.
還好啊太空很美麗
Earth is beautiful. Same old, same old.
地球很漂亮,一切還是老樣子
What's wrong? Nothing.Everything's fine.Howard.
怎么了,沒事啊,一切都好,霍華德
The other astronauts are being mean to me.
其他宇航員都欺負(fù)我
No, what are they doing?
不是吧 他們怎么欺負(fù)你了
Well, like for instance, the other day when I was asleep, one of the guys went on a space walk
像那天我還在睡覺其中一個出去太空漫步
and glued a bigeyed rubber alien mask to the outside of my window.
然后在我窗外粘了大眼橡膠外星人的面具
When I woke up, I screamed for like nine minutes.Oh, Howie.
我醒來后,大概尖叫了九分鐘,可憐的華仔
You can see it if you want. It's on YouTube. Google "Astronaut screams for nine minutes."
你想看的話看得到視頻網(wǎng)站有只需搜索"宇航員尖叫九分鐘"
Why don't you stand up to them?What am I supposed to say? I don't know.
你為什么不跟他們講道理呢?我該說什么呢?不知道
Say, "Being mean is lame. What's cool is being nice."
就說 "欺負(fù)人不好,對人友善才酷"
Great, I'll do that when I want to be the first guy in space to get a wedgie.
哪天我想被人欺負(fù)到死我就會說的
Do you want me to call somebody at NASA? No.
要我打電話找太空總署的人嗎?不用
My mom already tried that.It only made things worse.
我媽已經(jīng)打過了完全是火上澆油,
Gelatinous Sphere.Focused Locust.Temple of Yip.
粘性之球,專心蝗蟲,葉氏圣殿
I'm sorry. Wolowitz would never play that card.
抱歉 沃羅威茨絕不會出這張牌
All right, Lesser Demon Turtle.Fairy God Monster, I win.
好吧,幼年惡魔龜妖精神怪,我贏了
Your desperate need for friendship makes you weak.
你對友誼的渴求令你破綻百出
So, what are you guys doing later?
你們等下做什么
Stuart and I were thinking of going out for a drink.
斯圖爾特和我打算出去喝一杯
We're gonna try to meet some girls. 'Cause that's what we do.
我們打算去泡妞因為我們是采花高手
Watch out, ladies: a little coffee and cream coming your way.
小心了,女士們咖啡奶油黑白配來啦
In case you didn't follow that, I'm the coffee. Leonard?
怕你們不懂,咖啡是我萊納德
Maybe you'd like to go with them to meet girls.
不如你也和他們出去泡下妞吧
Why would I be interested? I have Penny.Yeah, for now.
我怎么會有興趣,我有佩妮暫時有而已
But that woman has a death wish, Leonard.
那女人可不是省油的燈,萊納德
She talks to strangers; she pets unfamiliar dogs;and it is ridiculously easy to break into her apartment.
她跟陌生人講話,她會逗陌生的狗而且闖進她的臥室實在是莫名其妙的容易
If I were you,I'd get a backup.
如果我是你我會準(zhǔn)備個后備
You can't just replace someone you care about with some other random person.
你不能用隨便碰到的人取代你喜歡的人
No, please don't ruin this for me.
拜托別破壞我的美夢
Do you remember how upset I was when they replaced Edward Norton as the Hulk?
你還記得啟用愛德華?諾頓出演綠巨人的時候我有多憤怒嗎
Yes, you walked around for a week saying,"Sheldon unhappy with casting choice."But, then Mark Ruffalo was the Hulk in The Avengers,and he was even better.
但馬克·魯法羅出演《復(fù)仇者聯(lián)盟》里的綠巨人時效果卻更好
What's your point?Call me a romantic.
你想說什么就當(dāng)我是浪漫主義者吧
I like to think that your Mark Ruffalo is still out there somewhere.
我覺得你還沒碰到你的"馬克?魯法羅"呢
This is ridiculous. Are we gonna play cards or not?
真是莫名其妙 到底還要不要打牌
I like Mark Ruffalo, too.
我也喜歡馬克·魯法羅
Yeah, settle down there, Fake Wolowitz。No one likes a kissup.
有節(jié)操點,偽沃羅威茨沒人喜歡馬屁精
So, I had to take Sheldon to the dentist this morning.Really? Yup.
我今早帶了謝爾頓去看牙醫(yī),是嗎?對
I told him if he didn't bite the hygienist,I'd take him for ice cream.
我跟他說,如果他不咬牙醫(yī)我就帶他去吃冰淇淋
I didn't have to take him for ice cream.You okay?
他咬了,我就省了一頓冰激凌你還好嗎
You seem a little distracted.
感覺有點心不在焉
Look, there's something I need to tell you.Yeah, okay.
聽我說,我要跟你說件事好的
I don't really know how to say this.Just say it.
我真不知道該如何開口,直說吧
Okay. Here goes.You slept with him?
好吧,那我就說了你跟他上床了
I didn't know what else to do.
我不知道還能怎么辦嘛
He had those big, sad eyes.
他用可憐的星星大眼看著我
Oh, sure, you had no choice.
是啊 你也是"別無選擇"
He looked at me like this.
他這樣看著我
Well, if that's all it takes,it's a good thing you don't have a dog.Don't worry.
這樣就能拐你上床那真是幸好你沒養(yǎng)狗,別擔(dān)心。
You'll have plenty of chances to break up with him: Your wedding day, your honeymoon,your 50th anniversary.
你多的是能跟他分手的機會你們的大喜之日。蜜月旅行金婚紀(jì)念日
Look, it's fine.We're not getting married, okay?
沒事的我們不會結(jié)婚的,明白嗎
We're keeping things, you know, homeostasis. It's so cute when she tries.
我們會保持內(nèi)穩(wěn)態(tài),她硬學(xué)那些詞的樣子好可愛
It's from Leonard"Last night was amazing.You're amazing.
萊納德發(fā)來的昨晚妙不可言,你也妙不可言
I'm so lucky to have you in my life."Okay, stop it.
我真幸運,人生中有你相伴"好啦。 別鬧了
Hey, Bernie, guess what?
小妮妮,你猜怎么樣
I stood up to the other astronauts like you said and I got to tell you, last night was the first time in a week I got a good night's sleep. Oh, Howie.
我照你說的 跟其他宇航員攤牌我得跟你說 昨晚是我這一周來第一次睡個安穩(wěn)覺。華仔
What's wrong? You look upset.
怎么啦 你一臉不開心的樣子
Nope, this is my proud face.