《生活大爆炸第三季》(英文:The Big Bang Theory Season 3)是由馬克·森卓斯基執(zhí)導,查克·羅瑞、比爾·布拉迪編劇,吉姆·帕森斯、約翰尼·蓋爾克奇、卡蕾·措科、西蒙·赫爾伯格、昆瑙·內亞、梅麗莎·勞奇共同主演的美國情景喜劇。第三季于2009年9月21日在哥倫比亞廣播公司(CBS)播出。講述了從北極回來的Howard、Raj、Leonard、Sheldon發(fā)生的又一系列令人啼笑皆非的事情。
Good morning, Leonard. How many times have I asked you not to do that?
早啊 萊納德 我告訴過你多少次了不要那么做
Counting this instance? 317. Where's Penny?
算上這次嗎 317次 佩妮呢
She returned to her apartment. I presume to shower and vomit.
她回她家去了 我猜應該是去洗澡加嘔吐了
Not necessarily in that order. I wonder why she didn't say goodbye.
順序不一定是按這個 她為啥都沒道別一下呢
Are you expecting me to offer an explanation of human behavior?
你是在叫我解釋一下人類行為嗎
I know. I just thought as an outsider, you might be able to provide a fresh perspective.
難為你了 我只是覺得當局者迷 旁觀者清嘛
I have no difficulty believing you're not butter.
我相信你個小東西絕對不是黃油
Oh, hey. Oh, hi.Um, I gotta run. Early shift.
嘿 嗨 我得趕緊走了 早班
Okay, I'll walk down with you.
好啊 我和你一起下樓
So, last night was fun, huh?
昨晚挺有意思的 對吧
Yeah, it must have been. I just threw up in my closet.
那必須的 我剛吐在我壁櫥里了
Bummer. Anyway, I was thinking tonight maybe we could catch a movie.
杯具啊 我在想啊 咱倆今晚去看場電影如何
Oh, yeah, tonight's not great for me.
今晚我不太方便
Doesn't have to be tonight. I'm free pretty much always.
不一定是今天晚上 我差不多啥時候都有空
Leonard, last night was a mistake.
萊納德 昨晚那件事是個錯誤
When you say "Mistake," Do you mean a fortunate mistake, like the discovery of penicillin?
你說"錯誤" 是塞翁失馬那種嗎 就比如發(fā)現(xiàn)青霉素
Look, I'm sorry. I was drunk, I was lonely, I hated Zack. Can we just forget it ever happened?
我很抱歉 我喝高了 很寂寞 我討厭扎克 咱倆就當沒發(fā)生過好嗎
No, it's pretty well imprinted on my brain. Especially the whole rodeo thing.
不行 整件事幾乎已經(jīng)刻在我腦子里了 特別是騎術表演那部分
Oh, God! So, that's it? Wham, bam, thank you, Leonard?
老天 就這樣啊 提上褲子就不認人啦
Look, I said I'm sorry. Can't you please let it go?
我都道歉了 你就別糾結這事兒了行嗎
How am I supposed to let it go? You used me for sex!
你說的倒輕松啊 你居然把我當泄欲對象
Morning, Mrs. Gunderson. Good morning, Leonard. Or should I say "Yeehaw"?
早安 岡德森太太 早啊 萊納德 或者我該說 "咦哈"
Holy crap. What? We finally have proof that aliens walk among us.
我靠 怎么了 我們終于證實了人類之中藏有外星人
Excuse me? The dating site matched a woman with Sheldon.
你說啥 這個約會網(wǎng)站找到了個適合謝爾頓的女人
You're kidding. An actual woman?
不可能吧 一個實實在在的女人
Yeah, look. Breasts and everything.
你看 胸部 該有的都有
Trust me, breasts doesn't necessarily mean woman.
相信我 有胸的不一定就是女人
Since when? I'll show you a picture of my Uncle Louie in a bathing suit sometime.
啥時候有這么一說 我回頭給你看張我路易叔叔穿泳裝的照片
Leonard, you gotta see this. We found a match for Sheldon.
萊納德 快來看啊 我們居然找到適合謝爾頓的姑娘了
Great. Maybe she can have sex with him, and then walk out on him the next morning without so much as a "How do you do?"
很好 說不定她會跟他上床 然后第二天一早連個招呼都不打就閃人
Do you know what he's talking about?
你知道他說啥呢嗎
Nope. Why don't you ask him?
不知道 你問問唄
Leonard, what are you talking about?
萊納德 你說啥呢
I don't want to talk about it. That was a lousy suggestion.
我不想談這個 瞧你出的這餿主意
Whatever. Right now, Dr. Sheldon Cooper has to send an email to his perfect match.
隨便啦 現(xiàn)在謝爾頓·庫珀博士要給他的真命天女發(fā)封郵件
"Greetings, fellow lifeform...If she can do it, I can do it. If she can do it, I can do it.
"您好 同類生物" 她能做到 那我也能 她能做到 那我也能
If she can do it, I can do it. I can't do it.
她能做到 那我也能 我無能了
Hello? Oh, hi. Hey.Hi, Leslie.
誰啊 你好 你好啊 萊斯利
Leonard Hofstadter. What're you doing here?
萊納德·霍夫斯塔德 有何貴干
Uh, I know! It's been a while! Yeah, 18 months.
是啊 咱倆好久沒見了 對啊 18個月
Right. Right. So how you doing? Fine. You?
是啊 是啊 你怎么樣啊 挺好的 你呢
Uh, not bad. You remember when we used to have sex and you said that it didn't mean anything, it was just for fun?
不錯 你還記得之前咱倆上床 你說這事兒沒什么實際意義 只是為了娛樂
Yeah. You, uh, want to do that again?
是啊 你想再來一次嗎
What happened? Blondie dumped you?
怎么了 金發(fā)美女把你甩了
She didn't dump me. We were just in different places in the relationship.
不是她甩我 我倆處在一段關系里的不同位置
Right. Um... anyway, apparently, it's okay to go back to people you're no longer seeing and have recreational sex with them.
是嘛 隨便了 顯然呢 找個好久不見的人然后倆人娛樂性地打一炮也沒啥不好的吧
So, what do you say? Let me think about it.
你覺得如何 我考慮下哈
She's not coming back. She wants to meet us.
她不會再開門了 她想見我們
Not us. Him. Yes, but him doesn't even know about her.
不是我們 是他 是啊 可是他根本不認識她
Well, him about to find out about her.
哎呀 他會認識她的
Really? Us gonna tell him?
真的嗎 我們要告訴他嗎
Who's going to tell whom about what? Sheldon.
誰要告訴誰什么 謝爾頓
Hey. Hi. Your surprise confuses me. I live here. Right.
嗨 你們這么驚訝讓我很困惑 我住在這兒 是啊
So, listen, what are you doing tomorrow afternoon?
那個啥 明天下午你什么安排
Be more specific. 4:30. That's not afternoon. That's preevning. What?
說的具體點 四點半 那不是下午 那是傍晚 什么
It's a time of day I invented. It better defines the ambiguous period between afternoon and evening: preevning.
是我發(fā)明的描述時間方式 更好地定義了個模棱兩可的時段 下午和晚上之間就是傍晚
I'm fairly certain it will catch on as it fills a desperate need.
我確信因為急需精確描述 這詞定會廣為流傳
Right, okay. What are you doing tomorrow preevning?
好吧 那你明天傍晚準備做什么
Well, tomorrow's Saturday. Saturday night is laundry night.
明天是周六 周六晚是洗衣夜
So I'll be spending the preevning presorting and presoaking.
所以傍晚我會用來預分選衣物并預浸濕
Okay, what if I were to tell you, tomorrow, at 4:30, you could meet a woman who has been scientifically chosen to be your perfect mate?
如果我告訴你 明天4點半你將遇到科學挑選出來的你的完美伴侶呢
I would snort in derision and throw my arms in the air, exhausted by your constant tomfoolery.
我會嘲諷地哼一聲 無奈地攤開雙手 疲于應付你們這種經(jīng)常的無聊之舉
But it's true. But wewe put all your vital information into this dating site, answered all their questions just like you would,
但這是真的 我們把你所有重要信息上傳到了交友網(wǎng)站 學著你的方式回答了他們所有問題
and they found a match for you. Her name is Amy Farrah Fowler.
他們找到了個跟你匹配的 她叫艾米·菲拉·福勒
Please. Even assuming you could answer any question the way I would, the algorithms used by matchmaking sites are complete hokum.
拜托 即使你們學得像我的回答 這種紅娘網(wǎng)站的算法本身就是胡扯的
And that's exactly the answer we gave to the question:
他們問到這個問題的時候 我們就是這么回答的
"What is your attitude towards online dating?" Howard wanted to write "Mumbo jumbo," But I said no.
你對在線交友持何態(tài)度 霍華德想回答"毫無意義" 但我認為不是
Our Sheldon would say "Hokum."
咱謝爾頓會回答"胡扯"
Come on, where's your scientific curiosity?
拜托 你的科學好奇心呢
Well, most of it is being applied to unraveling the secrets of the universe
大部分都用來探索宇宙的秘密了
while the rest of it's wondering why I'm having this conversation with you.
剩下的則用來思考 我為何要跟你們聊這個了
Okay, how about this. Even Spock had a date once every seven years.
好吧 這么說吧 即使史波克每七年也會約會一次的
He didn't date. It was Pon Farr. His blood boiled with mating lust.
他那不是約會 那是發(fā)情期到了 他因壓抑的性欲而熱血沸騰
Well, whywhy don't you start with a cup of coffee, and you can Pon Farr Amy Farrah Fowler later.
那你何不先喝上杯咖啡 晚點就可以跟艾米·菲拉·福勒發(fā)發(fā)情了
I don't drink coffee.
我不喝咖啡的
All right, you can have a hot chocolate.
好吧 那就喝杯熱巧克力
As I will not be engaging in this nonsense,my choice of beverage is moot.
反正我不會去做這種無聊事 選什么飲料無關緊要
But for the record, I only drink hot chocolate in months with an "R" In them.
但我正式說明下我只在月份中帶有R字母那月才喝熱巧克力
Why? What's life without whimsy?
為什么 不為無益之事 何以遣有涯之生
Okay, I'm out. Sheldon, I've hidden the dirty sock from the roof somewhere in your apartment.
好吧 我沒轍了 謝爾頓 我把屋頂拿來的一只臟襪子藏在你們公寓里了
Unless you are willing to come with us to meet this girl, it will remain there forever.
除非你愿意跟我們去見那女孩 不然 它會永遠藏在那
You're bluffing. Are you willing to risk it?
你只是在嚇唬我 你真愿意冒這個險嗎
Curse you. 30 feet.
詛咒你 30英尺
Oh. Hey, Leonard. I was a perfectly happy, geeky, little lonely guy, and you ruined me!
你好 萊納德 我本是個完美的小個子剩男 快樂又書呆 是你毀了我
Are you drunk?
你喝醉了嗎
Come on. We're gonna have sex, and it's not gonna mean a thing!
拜托 我們上床吧 反正也是沒有意義的
Are you out of your mind?!
你瘋了嗎
I'm really starting to think there's a double standard here.
我真的開始認為這是雙重標準了
In a few minutes, when I gloat over the failure of this enterprise, how would you prefer I do it?
幾分鐘后 等我幸災樂禍地冷眼旁觀著本次相親的失敗 你們更愿意我怎么做
The standard "I told you so"? The classic "Neenerneener"?
是標準答案 我早說過會這樣 還是經(jīng)典的"哦也哦也"(表嘲諷)
Or just my normal look of haughty derision?
還是用我平常那副高傲嘲弄的表情
You don't know we're wrong yet. Haughty derision it is.
現(xiàn)在還不能斷定我們錯了 還是高傲嘲弄表情吧
Excuse me. I'm Amy Farrah Fowler. You're Sheldon Cooper.
打擾下 我是艾米·菲拉·福勒 你是謝爾頓·庫珀
Hello, Amy Farrah Fowler.
你好 艾米·菲拉·福勒
I'm sorry to inform you that you have been taken in by unsupportable mathematics designed to prey on the gullible and the lonely.
我很遺憾地告訴你 你上當了 被設計用來欺騙很傻很天真剩男剩女的無知算法騙了
Additionally, I'm being blackmailed with a hidden dirty sock.
此外 我是被一只藏起來的臟襪子勒索了才來的
If that was slang, I'm unfamiliar with it.
那是俚語的話 我從沒聽說過
If it was literal, I share your aversion to soiled hosiery.
要是字面意義的話 我跟你一樣討厭臟襪子
In any case, I'm here because my mother and I have agreed that I will date at least once a year.
無論如何 我來這是因為答應了我媽每年至少約會一次
Interesting. My mother and I have the same agreement about church.
有意思 我跟我媽在關于上教堂這點上有過同樣對話
I don't object to the concept of a deity, but I'm baffled by the notion of one that takes attendance.
我并不反對神的概念 但實在不理解上教堂還得點名
Well, then you might want to avoid East Texas. Noted.
那你應該不會想去德州東部 記住了
Now, before this goes any further,
相親繼續(xù)進行之前
you should know that all forms of physical contact up to and including coitus are off the table.
我先聲明 所有身體接觸 包括但并不限于交媾均不予討論
May I buy you a beverage? Tepid water, please.
能請你喝杯飲料嗎 溫水 謝謝
Good God, what have we done?
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