人生不設(shè)限·第五章 態(tài)度決定高度

我開(kāi)了一家公司，專門安排我的演講活動(dòng)。我將公司取名為“態(tài)度決定高度”，因?yàn)槿绻皇怯姓娴膽B(tài)度，我不可能超越自己的肢體障礙，也不可能接觸到那么多人。

When I created a company to handle my corporate speaking engagements, I named it Attitude Is Altitude because without a positive attitude I never would have been able to rise above my disabilities and reach so many people.

或許你覺(jué)得“調(diào)整態(tài)度”的概念很好笑，因?yàn)樵谠S多勵(lì)志廣告或教練技能教材里，這已經(jīng)是老生常談了。然而，控制并調(diào)整態(tài)度的確具有力量，可以讓人轉(zhuǎn)換情緒，并停止畫地為牢的行為。心理學(xué)家兼哲學(xué)家威廉·詹姆斯(William James)說(shuō)過(guò)，改變態(tài)度就能改變?nèi)松撬莻€(gè)時(shí)代最偉大的發(fā)現(xiàn)之一。

You may be tempted to scoff at the concept of "attitude adjustment" because it has become such a staple of motivational posters and coaching materials. But there is real power in controlling your attitude, adjusting it to counter moods and stop behaviors that may threaten your ability to live without limits. The psychologist and philosopher William James, who taught at Harvard University, said that one of the greatest discoveries of his generation was the realization that by changing our attitudes, we can change our lives.

不論是否能夠意識(shí)到，你總是會(huì)通過(guò)自己獨(dú)特的觀點(diǎn)或態(tài)度來(lái)看待這個(gè)世界。你的決定與行動(dòng)奠基于這些態(tài)度，因此當(dāng)事情行不通時(shí)，你有能力借此來(lái)調(diào)整態(tài)度，改變自己的人生。

Whether you are aware of it or not, you view the world through your own unique perspectives or attitudes based on your beliefs of what is good or bad, wrong or right, fair or unfair. Your decisions and actions are based on those attitudes, so if what you've been doing isn't working, you have the power to adjust your attitude and change your life.

請(qǐng)把“態(tài)度”想象成電視機(jī)的遙控器。假如現(xiàn)在正在看的節(jié)目對(duì)你沒(méi)有任何幫助，你就拿起遙控器轉(zhuǎn)臺(tái);而無(wú)論碰到什么挑戰(zhàn)，當(dāng)你沒(méi)有得到想要的結(jié)果時(shí)，你可以調(diào)整態(tài)度，就像用遙控器轉(zhuǎn)臺(tái)一樣。

Think of your attitude as the remote control for your television set. If the program you are watching doesn't do anything for you, then you simply grab the remote and change it. You can adjust your attitude in much the same way when you aren't getting the results you want, no matter what challenges you encounter.

琳達(dá)是個(gè)音樂(lè)老師，她寫信告訴我，她如何以驚人的態(tài)度幫助自己克服兒時(shí)車禍帶來(lái)的影響。若非如此，那場(chǎng)車禍很可能毀了她的一生。小學(xué)三年級(jí)時(shí)，琳達(dá)在一場(chǎng)車禍中傷得很嚴(yán)重，昏迷了兩天半，醒來(lái)后不能走路，不能說(shuō)話，也無(wú)法吃東西。

Linda, a music teacher, wrote and described how her amazing attitude helped her overcome a childhood accident that easily could have ruined her life. She was only halfway through grade school when she was severely injured in a car accident. Linda spent two and a half days in a coma, and when she regained consciousness, she could not walk, talk, or eat.

醫(yī)生曾擔(dān)心琳達(dá)的腦部會(huì)受損，永遠(yuǎn)無(wú)法正常說(shuō)話或走路，但幸好她的心智、語(yǔ)言能力和身體都逐漸復(fù)原。事實(shí)上，目前琳達(dá)的確因?yàn)檐嚨溋粝铝撕筮z癥，車禍造成她的右眼視力不足。

Although doctors feared she would be mentally impaired and never able to speak or walk normally, her mind, speech, and body gradually recovered. In fact, Linda's only remaining medical problem from the horrible accident is a damaged right eye that has only limited vision.

這位女性承受了難以想象的痛苦，經(jīng)歷許多次手術(shù)，依然留下視力受損這個(gè)問(wèn)題。如果琳達(dá)覺(jué)得生命對(duì)她真不公平，似乎也不能怪她，畢竟有這樣的遭遇，本來(lái)就很容易讓人覺(jué)得受害、痛苦。不過(guò)，她選擇了這樣的態(tài)度：

This woman suffered incredible pain, endured many operations, and still has impaired eyesight. She could easily feel victimized and bitter. You could hardly blame her for taking the attitude that life has treated her unfairly. Instead, this is the attitude she chose:

“我的兩眼視力不平衡，有時(shí)會(huì)讓我感到挫折，但這時(shí)我想起自己從何而來(lái)、要去向何方，并了解到上帝拯救我是有理由的：要見(jiàn)證他在我生命中施行的作為。我的眼睛是上帝給我的提醒，讓我知道自己并不完美，但不完美沒(méi)有關(guān)系。另外，我必須全然仰望上帝給我力量。上帝選擇通過(guò)我眼睛的缺陷，顯明它的能力——我雖軟弱，但必剛強(qiáng)。”她如此寫道。

"Sometimes I am frustrated that my eyes don't work in perfect unity with each other," she wrote to me. "But then I remember where I came from and where I could be, and realize God saved me for a reason—to live as a witness to His work in my life. My eye is a reminder from God that I'm not perfect, but that's okay; I need to depend fully on Him for my strength. God chose to show His power through the weakness of my eye—though I am weak, He is strong."

琳達(dá)選擇把她不完美的視力當(dāng)作上帝“對(duì)她人生的完美計(jì)劃”的一部分。她寫道：“他改變了我對(duì)人生的態(tài)度。我知道自己的生命隨時(shí)可能結(jié)束，所以我時(shí)時(shí)刻刻都努力為上帝而活。另外，我也試著用正面觀點(diǎn)看待每一件事，努力將自己的全部獻(xiàn)給上帝與眾人，真心關(guān)懷周遭的人。”

Linda chose to accept her imperfect vision as part of God's "perfect plan for my life," she wrote. "He changed my attitude toward life—I know that mine may very well end at any moment, so I'm trying to live for Him all the time. Also, I try to always put a positive spin on everything, try to give my all to God and others, and truly care about the people around me."

琳達(dá)選擇去感謝她可以思考、說(shuō)話和走路，而且在許多方面都能正常生活，而不是一直把注意力放在自己視力不足這件事情上。你我也可以選擇像她一樣的態(tài)度。

Instead of focusing on her limited vision in one eye, Linda chooses to be grateful that she is able to think, speak, walk, and live a normal life in most ways. You and I have the ability to choose our attitudes just as she chose hers.

你不必是個(gè)圣人就能做到這點(diǎn)。當(dāng)你遇上悲劇或個(gè)人危機(jī)時(shí)，會(huì)經(jīng)歷恐懼、生氣和悲傷等階段，這很正常，也很健康。但是到了某一個(gè)時(shí)間點(diǎn)，你得告訴自己：“我還在這里，我是要把余生都用來(lái)沉浸在悲情之中，還是要超越現(xiàn)況、追求夢(mèng)想?”

You don't have to be a saint to do that. When you experience a tragedy or a personal crisis, it's perfectly normal and probably healthy to go through stages of fear and anger and sadness, but at some point we all have to say: "I'm still here. Do I want to spend the rest of my life wallowing in misery, or do I want to rise above what has happened to me and pursue my dreams?"

這么做很容易嗎?不，一點(diǎn)也不。你必須有極大的決心，還要很清楚自己的人生目標(biāo)是什么，要抱持盼望與信心，并相信自己真的擁有可以與人分享的才能和技藝。有許多人已經(jīng)證明了正面態(tài)度的確可以讓人克服難關(guān)，琳達(dá)只是其中一個(gè)例子。你我真的無(wú)法掌控所發(fā)生的事，但我們可以控制自己如何回應(yīng)。如果選擇正確的態(tài)度，就能超越挑戰(zhàn)——這雖然是老生常談，卻是經(jīng)過(guò)時(shí)間考驗(yàn)、無(wú)可否認(rèn)的真理。

Is it easy to do that? No, it is not. It takes great determination, not to mention a sense of purpose, hope, faith, and the belief that you have talents and skills to share. But Linda is just one example of many, many people who've shown what it's possible to overcome with a positive attitude. The age-old, time-proven, undeniable truth is that you and I may have absolutely no control over what happens to us, but we can control how we respond. If we choose the right attitude, we can rise above whatever challenges we face.

你或許無(wú)法掌控下一件倒霉事：龍卷風(fēng)襲擊你的房子;醉漢撞到你的車;老板炒你魷魚;另一半跟你說(shuō)“我需要自由的空間”。我們經(jīng)常被生命偷襲，你可以悲傷、難過(guò)，但之后要把自己拉起來(lái)，問(wèn)：“好，接下來(lái)是什么?”哭夠了，發(fā)泄完了，就振作起來(lái)，調(diào)整你的態(tài)度。

You likely will have no control over the next big bad bump in your life. A hurricane hits your house. A drunk driver crashes into your car. Your employer lays you off. Your significant other says, "I need space." We are all blindsided from time to time. Be sad, feel bad, but then pull yourself up and ask, What's next? Once you've whimpered awhile, vented, or shed all the tears in your tank, pull yourself together and make an attitude adjustment.