過年帶對象見家長，這些小心機讓你如魚得水！（雙語）

春節(jié)臨近，不少朋友要帶對象回家見家長。第一次見面，難免感到緊張、忐忑。那么，如何避免尷尬，創(chuàng)造一次輕松愉快的相見呢?

情感專家蘇珊·溫特給你總結(jié)了6條“金科玉律”。

01

先征得家人的同意

不要總想著給爸媽制造驚喜，小心驚喜變驚嚇!

一定要提前告訴家人你要帶對象回家，最好可以向爸媽簡單介紹一下他/她，提前發(fā)幾張照片也是很有必要的。

If you're bringing a significant other home, you'll need to run it by your family and make sure they're on board.

如果你要把另一半帶回家，你需要先知會家人，征得他們的同意。

"You need to have a preparatory conversation with your family," said Winter. "Tell them that you're seeing someone special and you'd like to integrate them into the holiday plans."

溫特說：“你需要提前和家人談一談，讓他們做好心理準備。告訴他們，你戀愛了，并打算帶戀人回家過節(jié)。”

preparatory [pr?'pær?t?ri]：準備性的，預(yù)備的

02

提前把各位親戚的特點告知另一半

帶對象回家，少不了走親訪友。那么，提前給對象補課就很有必要啦，尤其記得要詳細介紹那些比較特別的親戚們!讓他/她胸有成竹地應(yīng)對“七大姑八大姨”吧。

Every family has its quirks and kooky relatives that join in on holiday celebrations. Give your partner an idea of who will be there and the protocol for their behavior, and highlight relatives that you think they'd get along with.

每個家庭的節(jié)日慶祝活動都會有幾個古怪的親戚來參加。讓你的伴侶知道哪些親戚會來，他們的言行舉止大概是什么樣子，并重點介紹幾位你覺得能和伴侶合得來的親戚。

"Give them a 'what's up' as to each person and tell them the conversations to avoid and the conversations they might want to enter," said Winter.

溫特說：“給每個親戚都做一個簡介，告訴伴侶什么話應(yīng)該說，什么話不應(yīng)該說。”

03

安排好住宿問題

過年帶對象回家，住宿是個難題。若是打算安排對象在家留宿，那么務(wù)必要提前摸清父母對此的看法，綜合考慮父母的意見和習(xí)慣，再做最后的決定。

Even if you and your partner spend the night at each other's places all the time, your family's standards can be a different story, making sleeping arrangements a potentially fraught topic. Winter recommends treading carefully.

即使你和伴侶經(jīng)常在對方的住所里過夜，但是在父母家里過夜則是另一回事，可能會帶來一些煩惱。溫特建議對這件事要小心斟酌。

"This depends on how close you are to your parents and how open-minded they are," she said. "You don't have to stay with the family. You can stay in a hotel. You're adults. If you do stay in the home, you know your parents well enough — know the ground rules and don't push it."

“這取決于你和你父母的關(guān)系有多親近，以及他們有多開明。”她說，“你不必非得在家里過夜。你們可以住酒店。你們是成年人了。如果你真的在家過夜，你應(yīng)該很了解你的父母——知道他們的底線，并且不要逾越。”

04

把伴侶不吃的東西告訴掌勺的人

過年回家，聚餐是主要活動，若是對象有某些飲食禁忌，務(wù)必要提前告知掌勺人。對象吃得開心，父母長輩們也會感到欣慰。

The holidays center around food, so make sure your partner doesn't go hungry. If they have allergies, are vegetarian or vegan, or have other dietary restrictions, whoever is cooking needs to know that in advance.

節(jié)日聚會都是圍繞著吃展開的，所以要確保你的伴侶不會餓肚子。如果他們對某些食物過敏，是素食者，或有其他飲食禁忌，都要提前告訴做飯的人。

Winter also suggests bringing food with you that you know your partner can have to make it easier on everyone.

溫特還建議你帶一些伴侶能吃的食物回家，這樣大家都比較省事。

05

選擇好要參加的家庭活動

除了聚餐，過年回家，親友相聚，團體活動也是必不可少的。盡可能組織一些競技性較弱、輕松有趣的活動。這樣既可以快速拉近雙方距離，也營造了友好放松的氛圍，讓你的對象與家人朋友們迅速打成一片。

You probably have a good idea of what the holidays with your family are like. Set yourself and your partner up for success by choosing the parts of the celebrations that will be the least intimidating and the most enjoyable.

你很可能對自家的節(jié)日活動了如指掌。選擇最沒有挑戰(zhàn)性、最有趣的慶?；顒?，讓你和伴侶可以成功搞定。

06

給自己和伴侶留點獨處時間

見家長本就是件壓力超大的事情，你可以合理安排一些獨處時間，這樣你們和父母雙方都可以獲得一定的休息。

Meeting a partner's family can be overwhelming. Introducing your partner to your family can be stressful. And spending lots of time around relatives during the holidays can be a lot to handle regardless.

見伴侶的家人可能會讓你抓狂。將伴侶介紹給家人也可能讓你壓力重重。此外，節(jié)日期間和親戚們一起待那么長時間也是很累心的事。

Winter recommends factoring in some time and space to breathe during your visit, even if it's just a walk around the block or a coffee run.

溫特建議，在拜訪家人期間，給自己和伴侶留出一些獨處時間，即使只是在街區(qū)散散步或出去買咖啡也是好的。

factor in：考慮進來

She said: "Keep in mind that your partner is having a new experience. Have your partner keep in mind that you're having a new experience. Just because it's the holidays, you don't have to spend the entirety of the time with your family."

她說：“要記住，這對你的伴侶來說是第一次。你的伴侶也要明白，這對你來說也是第一次。雖說是過節(jié)，你們也不用時時刻刻都和家人待在一起。”