8個(gè)理由告訴你 初次約會(huì)不必緊張

Dating, as most humans who engage in it have no doubt observed, can be a major source of stress -- especially first dates. You can waste a shocking amount of time worrying about your outfit, where you'll meet up, when you'll meet up and whether or not the date will go well. Here are eight reasons not to stress about the first date:

大多數(shù)約過(guò)會(huì)的人想必已經(jīng)留意到，約會(huì)也是壓力的一大來(lái)源，尤其是第一次約會(huì)。你會(huì)浪費(fèi)大量的時(shí)間在擔(dān)心你的穿著、見(jiàn)面地點(diǎn)、見(jiàn)面時(shí)間，以及約會(huì)是否順利。這是關(guān)于初次約會(huì)不必緊張的8個(gè)理由。

1. You get to judge, too.

1. 你也會(huì)評(píng)價(jià)對(duì)方。

It's very easy to waste a whole lot of time worrying about whether the person you're going on a date with will like you. But your precious hours are probably better spent thinking about whether you like your date. As Tom Hanks' character tells his fictional son in “Sleepless In Seattle”, “This is what single people do. They try other people on and see how they fit.” Spend your first date evaluating whether the person sitting across from you seems like a well-tailored suit or more like a ill-fitting item that's better left on the rack.

你會(huì)很容易把時(shí)間浪費(fèi)在擔(dān)憂“與你約會(huì)的人會(huì)不會(huì)喜歡你”這個(gè)問(wèn)題上。但約會(huì)前的幾小時(shí)可以更為有用，比如想想你會(huì)不會(huì)喜歡上你的約會(huì)對(duì)象。就像湯姆-漢克斯在電影《西雅圖夜未眠》中飾演的角色對(duì)兒子說(shuō)，“這就是單身人士做的事。他們約會(huì)對(duì)方，看看對(duì)方適不適合自己。” 初次約會(huì)時(shí)評(píng)價(jià)一下坐在你對(duì)面的那個(gè)人，看他是品行端莊的人還是邋遢不堪的人。

2. There's no need to be elaborate.

2. 沒(méi)有必要精心安排。

The focus of your first meet-up is getting a feel for the other person. That means that lighthearted conversation is paramount -- not a super creative plan that involves multiple stops, top-tier restaurants and hipster underground bars. Just pick a coffee shop/bar/restaurant where you feel comfortable … or make it really easy on yourself and make your date choose.

第一次見(jiàn)面的重點(diǎn)是試試對(duì)對(duì)方有沒(méi)有感覺(jué)。這意味著輕松愉悅的談話是最重要的，而不是一個(gè)富有創(chuàng)意的安排，比如去好幾個(gè)地方、去頂級(jí)餐廳和地下酒吧等等。只要選一家你感覺(jué)舒服的咖啡店或酒吧或餐廳就可以，或者由你的約會(huì)對(duì)象和你自己隨意做決定。

3. People are open to a lot of different date venues.

3. 人們對(duì)約會(huì)場(chǎng)所表示很隨意。

Judging from a new infographic from dating site HowAboutWe.com, Americans are open to a wide variety of dating activities. If you feel like eating frozen yogurt, seeing an art exhibit, going bowling or drinking a glass of wine, chances are that your date will be into it too.

據(jù)來(lái)自交友網(wǎng)站HowAboutWe.com的信息圖表分析，美國(guó)人對(duì)各式約會(huì)活動(dòng)很隨意。如果你喜歡喝凍酸奶、看展出、打保齡球、還是喝杯酒，你的約會(huì)對(duì)象說(shuō)不定也很喜歡這些。

4. You don't have much to lose.

4. 你沒(méi)什么好損失的。

You don't know the person well yet, so you probably aren't all that invested in them romantically. No matter how badly it goes, you'll get over it fairly quickly. That's the true beauty of a first date.

你還不是很了解這個(gè)人，所以你可能不會(huì)全身心地去營(yíng)造浪漫情調(diào)。無(wú)論進(jìn)展有多壞，你都可以很快平復(fù)過(guò)來(lái)。這是初次約會(huì)的真正魅力所在。

5. You can keep it short.

5. 要精簡(jiǎn)。

If you plan something casual, it'll be over in approximately the same amount of time it takes you to watch two episodes of “Girls.”

如果你有臨時(shí)安排，請(qǐng)控制一下時(shí)間，比如差不多看兩集HBO喜劇《衰姐們》的時(shí)間—差不多是1個(gè)小時(shí)吧。

6. If it goes really badly, it'll be a good story.

6. 如果約會(huì)進(jìn)展不順，那這段經(jīng)歷將是一個(gè)好故事。

Some of the most entertaining conversations you can have with friends revolve around dating horror stories. Whether you're recounting the story of the dude who casually mentioned that there was a rapist who hadn't been caught in his neighborhood, or the tale of the girl who wouldn't stop talking about her 10 cats, those hours of awkwardness are sure to elicit laughs for years to come. If your first date goes completely awry, at least you have fresh material for your next friend dinner.

你和朋友間一些有趣的談話可以圍繞著你的恐怖約會(huì)故事展開(kāi)了。不管你是在敘述一個(gè)家伙隨口就說(shuō)起了在他的小區(qū)里有個(gè)沒(méi)有被抓走的強(qiáng)奸犯的故事，還是描述一個(gè)一刻不停地談?wù)撍?0只小貓的女孩，這些故事絕對(duì)可以成為好幾年的笑料。如果你的初次約會(huì)真心不順利，至少在下次和朋友吃飯時(shí)，你有了新鮮談資。

7. It's nearly impossible to run out of things to talk about.

7. 不可能沒(méi)話可說(shuō)。

The first date covers all of your basics, which means that there are a lot of things to discuss: jobs, families, hometowns, hobbies, living situations … the list goes on.

初次約會(huì)可以談及你們所有的基本信息，也就是說(shuō)可以討論很多話題：家庭、家鄉(xiāng)、愛(ài)好、生活狀況等等。

8. It's (mostly) out of your hands, so why bother worrying?

8. 成事在天，為何要擔(dān)憂?

At the end of the day, all you can really control is how you behave. Maybe you'll meet the love of your life and maybe you won't. Whether or not the two of you click is largely a matter of luck, so just be genuine, try to have fun and then move on afterward. Breathe and remember -- it's only one date.

在一天的結(jié)束，所有你能控制的就是你的舉止。也許你將遇見(jiàn)你生命中的摯愛(ài)，也許你沒(méi)遇見(jiàn)。不管有沒(méi)有，在很大程度說(shuō)相遇是一種緣分，因而要真心實(shí)意，玩得開(kāi)心，繼續(xù)尋找。深呼吸一次，記?。哼@只是一次約會(huì)。