但你知道么:我的方式已經(jīng)完蛋了,完全無效。
I've never had a successful relationship with a guy thatI've pursued.
我追求過的人從來沒有好結(jié)果。
I'm sure there are many stories out there to thecontrary.
我相信有很多相反的故事。
But for me, those guys end up getting back togetherwith their ex-girlfriend, needing to take some time forthemselves, or going out of town for business.
但對我來說,那些最終和他們的前女友一起的人,需要花些時間在自己身上,或者離開城市去做生意。
Usually it doesn't even get that far. They usually just don't ever return my phone call.
通常維持不了多久。他們甚至就是不回我的電話。
And let me tell you, that didn't make me feel very in control of anything.
讓我來告訴你,這并沒有讓我感到絕對的控制權(quán)。
Since I've been implementing Greg's handy-dandy “he's just not that into you” philosophy, I've beenfeeling surprisingly more powerful.
自從我開始執(zhí)行格雷戈的神奇的“他其實沒那么喜歡你”的理念,我一直感到驚訝多于強大。
Because if the men are asking you out, if the men have to get your attention, then you, in fact, arethe one in control.
因為如果是男人在約你出去,如果是男人想得到你的關(guān)注,那么事實上你處于控制地位。
There's no scheming and plotting.
不需要策劃和謀劃。
And there is something great about knowing that my only job is to be as happy as I can be aboutmy life, and feel as good as I can about myself, and to lead as full and eventful a life as I can, so thatit doesn't ever feel like I'm just waiting around for some guy to ask me out.
知道自己唯一的工作是盡可能的幸福生活讓人感覺很棒,我可以感受最好的自己,盡可能過著多彩的生活,那樣就不會覺得我只是在等待某個人約我出去了。
And most importantly, it's good for us all to remember that we don't need to scheme and plot andbeg to get someone to ask us out. We're fantastic.
最重要的是,這對我們都很好,我們都要記住,我們不需要計劃和陰謀,并乞求得到別人來要約我們出去。我們真是太棒了。
This is What It Should Look Like, by Greg
這就是事情本來的模樣,格雷格
One night I was drinking in a bar and flirting with the bartender. I asked for her number.
一天晚上,我在酒吧里喝酒,跟酒保調(diào)情。我向她要號碼。
She said, “I don't give out my phone number because guys rarely call me when they say they'regoing to.
她說,“我不給男人我的電話號碼,因為他們說會打電話給我事實上卻很少打。
My name is Lindsey Adams, and if you want to call me, find my phone number.”
我的名字是琳賽亞當斯,如果你想打給我就去找我的電話號碼。”
Which I did—the very next day.
我第二天就這么做了。
Do you know how many Lindsey Adams there are in the phone book of a major city?
你知道一個大城市的電話簿上有多少個琳賽亞當斯嗎?
Let's just say I talked to about eight or nine before I found mine.
我打了8、9個電話才找到那個對的。
An actor we work with met a girl while he was making a public appearance on an aircraft carrier.
和我們一起工作的一個演員在一艘航空母艦上做公開露面時遇見了一個女孩。
He lost track of her in about ten minutes.
他在十分鐘左右失去了她的蹤跡。
And yet, because he was so smitten, he somehow managed to track her down in the army, andthey are now married.
然而,由于他完全被迷住了,他設(shè)法在軍隊里追蹤到她,現(xiàn)在他們結(jié)婚了。