布蘭妮·斯皮爾斯透露，她秘密反抗她的監(jiān)護(hù)權(quán)的所有方式

Long before the #FreeBritney movement began, Britney Spears was secretly fighting back against her conservatorship in creative ways.

早在#釋放布蘭妮運(yùn)動開始之前，布蘭妮·斯皮爾斯就在秘密地以創(chuàng)造性的方式反擊她的監(jiān)護(hù)人身份。

In the pop superstar's new tell-all memoir, The Woman in Me (out now), Spears, 41, reveals how she quietly rebelled against the conservatorship through which her father controlled her life for nearly 14 years. Her first act of defiance, she says, was dancing awkwardly on stage during her Las Vegas residency to make sure she didn't move her hair — because she knew it would upset her team.

在這位流行巨星的最新回憶錄《The Woman in Me》(現(xiàn)已出版)中，41歲的斯皮爾斯透露了她是如何悄悄地反抗父親對她生活近14年的控制的。她說，她的第一個反抗行為是在拉斯維加斯演出期間在舞臺上笨拙地跳舞，以確保自己不動頭發(fā)——因?yàn)樗肋@會讓她的團(tuán)隊(duì)感到不安。

"As performers, we girls have our hair," Spears writes. "That's the real thing guys want to see. They love to see the long hair move. They want you to thrash it. If your hair's moving, they can believe you're having a good time. In the most demoralizing moments of my Las Vegas residency, I wore tight wigs, and I'd dance in a way where I wouldn't move a hair on my head. Everyone who was making money off me wanted me to move my hair, and I knew it — so I did everything but that."

“作為表演者，我們女孩有自己的頭發(fā)，”斯皮爾斯寫道。“這才是男人們真正想看到的。他們喜歡看長發(fā)飄動。他們想讓你把它搗碎。如果你的頭發(fā)在動，他們會相信你玩得很開心。在我拉斯維加斯常駐期間最沮喪的時(shí)候，我戴著緊繃的假發(fā)，跳舞時(shí)我連一根頭發(fā)都不動。每個從我身上賺錢的人都想讓我動一下頭發(fā)，我知道這一點(diǎn)——所以我什么都做了，就是不動。”

Spears was proud of her small form of rebellion at the time, but looking back on it, she realized she hurt her own spirit more. "I realize how much of myself I withheld onstage, how much by trying to punish the people who held me captive I punished everyone else, too — including my loyal fans, including myself," she writes. "But now I know why I'd been sleepwalking through so much of the past thirteen years. I was traumatized. By holding back onstage, I was trying to rebel in some way, even if I was the only one who knew that was what was happening. And so I didn't toss my hair or flirt. I did the moves and I sang the notes, but I didn't put the fire behind it that I had in the past. Toning down my energy onstage was my own version of a factory slowdown."

斯皮爾斯當(dāng)時(shí)為自己的小叛逆感到自豪，但回頭看，她意識到她更多地傷害了自己的精神。她寫道:“我意識到我在舞臺上隱藏了多少自我，在試圖懲罰那些囚禁我的人的同時(shí)，我也懲罰了其他人——包括我忠實(shí)的粉絲，包括我自己。”“但現(xiàn)在我知道為什么在過去的十三年里，我一直在夢游。我受到了精神創(chuàng)傷。在舞臺上退縮，我試圖以某種方式反抗，即使我是唯一一個知道發(fā)生了什么的人。所以我沒有亂甩頭發(fā)，也沒有調(diào)情。我做了舞步，唱了音符，但我沒有像過去那樣把激情放在后面。在舞臺上放松精力是我自己對工廠放緩的看法。”

Another form of rebellion took place on social media, where Spears began to take back her agency through seemingly innocuous posts.

另一種形式的反抗發(fā)生在社交媒體上，布蘭妮開始通過看似無害的帖子收回她的經(jīng)紀(jì)公司。

"The first step toward securing my freedom was for people to begin to understand that I was still a real person — and I knew that I could do that by sharing more of my life on social media," she writes. "I started trying on new clothes and modeling them on Instagram. I found it incredibly fun. Even though some people online thought it was odd, I didn't care. When you've been sexualized your whole life, it feels good to be in complete control of the wardrobe and the camera."

“確保我自由的第一步是讓人們開始理解我仍然是一個真實(shí)的人——我知道我可以通過在社交媒體上分享更多我的生活來做到這一點(diǎn)，”她寫道。“我開始試穿新衣服，并在Instagram上展示它們。我發(fā)現(xiàn)它非常有趣。盡管網(wǎng)上有些人認(rèn)為這很奇怪，但我不在乎。當(dāng)你的一生都被性感化時(shí)，完全控制自己的衣櫥和鏡頭的感覺很好。”

While many people didn't understand the inspiration for those "odd" posts, Spears was finally getting a taste of freedom by making them.

雖然很多人不理解這些“奇怪”帖子的靈感來源，但布蘭妮終于通過制作這些帖子嘗到了自由的滋味。

"There were so many people in the industry at that time thinking that I was out of my mind," she writes. "At a certain point, I'd rather be 'crazy' and able to make what I want than 'a good sport' and doing what everyone tells me to do without being able to actually express myself. And on Instagram, I wanted to show that I existed."

“當(dāng)時(shí)業(yè)內(nèi)有很多人認(rèn)為我瘋了，”她寫道。“在某種程度上，我寧愿‘瘋了’，能夠做出我想要的東西，也不愿‘做個好樣的’，按照每個人告訴我的去做，卻不能真正表達(dá)自己。在Instagram上，我想展示我的存在。”

With these small but significant actions, Spears resisted the constraints she faced for years — until June 2021, when she called 911 to report her father for conservatorship abuse, kickstarting the legal battle that ultimately won her freedom.

通過這些小而重要的行動，斯皮爾斯抵制了她多年來面臨的限制，直到2021年6月，她撥打911報(bào)告她的父親濫用監(jiān)護(hù)權(quán)，開啟了最終贏得她自由的法律戰(zhàn)。

The conservatorship had begun in February 2008, when Spears was 26. Following her highly publicized breakdown in late 2007 and early 2008, her father, Jamie Spears, filed for a conservatorship over his daughter's person and estate. What was ostensibly meant to be a temporary measure lasted for more than a decade, during which time the pop star released four albums, went on two concert tours, served as a judge on The X Factor, and performed the wildly popular Piece of Me residency in Las Vegas.

布蘭妮的監(jiān)護(hù)權(quán)始于2008年2月，當(dāng)時(shí)布蘭妮26歲。在2007年底和2008年初，布蘭妮高調(diào)分手后，她的父親杰米·斯皮爾斯申請了對女兒人身和財(cái)產(chǎn)的監(jiān)護(hù)權(quán)。這個表面上是臨時(shí)措施的措施持續(xù)了十多年，在此期間，這位流行歌手發(fā)行了四張專輯，進(jìn)行了兩次巡回演唱會，擔(dān)任了《X音素》的評委，并在拉斯維加斯演出了廣受歡迎的《Piece of Me》。

Despite her high creative output and the income it generated, Spears was not free to make meaningful decisions regarding her career, personal life, health, or finances on her own until she was finally able to deliver explosive testimony alleging a slew of abuses by her father and the conservatorship team.

盡管她的創(chuàng)意產(chǎn)出很高，收入也很高，但斯皮爾斯在自己的事業(yè)、個人生活、健康或財(cái)務(wù)方面并沒有自由做出有意義的決定，直到她最終能夠提供爆炸性的證詞，指控她的父親和管理團(tuán)隊(duì)的一系列虐待。

Spears' conservatorship was terminated in November 2021, and her memoir marks a first step in celebrating her hard-won freedom by telling her story in her own words.

斯皮爾斯的監(jiān)護(hù)權(quán)于2021年11月終止，她的回憶錄是慶祝她來之不易的自由的第一步，用她自己的話講述了她的故事。