Psychologists have spent years studying the traits that are fundamental to successful long-term relationships and come up with a few key ideas.
心理學(xué)家花了多年研究保持長期戀愛關(guān)系的特點(diǎn),發(fā)現(xiàn)了關(guān)鍵的幾條。
You think about your partner often when you're not together
你們不在一起的時(shí)候,你也在想你的愛侶
Certain relationship characteristics were linked to stronger feelings of love. One especially interesting finding: The more often people reported thinking about their partner when they were apart, the more in love they felt.
某些戀愛關(guān)系的特點(diǎn)和更深層的情感相關(guān)聯(lián)。有個(gè)有趣的發(fā)現(xiàn):和伴侶分開始想著伴侶越多,他們感受到的愛也更多。
You respond positively to each other's good news
你們對(duì)彼此的好消息都作出正面回應(yīng)
A passive-constructive response would be understated support -- a warm smile and a simple "That's good news.
"富積極建設(shè)意義的回應(yīng)是含蓄的支持,如溫暖的微笑和簡單一句“這是好消息”。
You spend some time apart, with your own friends
你們會(huì)分開和自己的朋友一起共度時(shí)光
If you want to be happy in your marriage, it's best not to look to your partner for all your existential needs. Psychologists recommend finding yourself in hobbies, friends, and work as well.
如果你希望婚姻幸福,最好不要把你的伴侶視作滿足你生存需求的對(duì)象。心理學(xué)家們推薦,要找到自己的興趣愛好、朋友和工作。
You have a similar sense of humor
你們的幽默感相似
Having a "private" language with your partner -- i.e. nicknames and jokes-- can help facilitate bonding and often predicts relationship satisfaction.
和你的伴侶有“私密”的語言,如昵稱和笑話,有助加強(qiáng)關(guān)系,通常預(yù)示戀愛關(guān)系滿足感。
You split chores evenly
你們平分家務(wù)瑣事
In one poll, as many as 62% of adults said that sharing chores is very important to a successful marriage.
一項(xiàng)民意測試顯示有多達(dá)62%的成年人稱分擔(dān)瑣事對(duì)成功的婚姻至關(guān)重要。
You try new things together
你們一起嘗試新事物
Novelty alone is probably not enough to save a marriage in crisis. But for couples who have a reasonably good but slightly dull relationship, novelty may help reignite old sparks.
新意本身并不足以拯救婚姻危機(jī),但對(duì)于關(guān)系尚可稍稍無趣的戀愛關(guān)系而言,新穎有趣有助重燃起過往的火花。
You don't have a lot of extreme downturns in your relationship
你們的戀愛關(guān)系里沒有太多極端的低谷轉(zhuǎn)折
Conflict-ridden couples fought often and had a lot of mini-fluctuations in their level of commitment.
常有爭執(zhí)牽絆的伴侶經(jīng)常吵架,在婚姻承諾中常有起起落落。
You know how to recover from a fight
你們知道如何爭執(zhí)后恢復(fù)關(guān)系
The No. 1 shared trait among successful relationships is being able to repair the bond after a fight. It's about the way you approach it.
成功婚姻關(guān)系共有的特點(diǎn)中,第一條就是爭執(zhí)后能夠修復(fù)關(guān)系。是你如何處理問題。