雙語暢銷書·怦然心動 Chapter 09　越變越大，越變越臭

Chapter 09

越變越大，越變越臭

周日早上，我醒來的時候，覺得自己像是得了一場重感冒。我好像剛剛做了個夢，就像發(fā)燒時腦子里涌出的恐怖、費解、難以名狀的噩夢。

我發(fā)現(xiàn)自己必須學(xué)會擺脫這些恐怖、費解、難以名狀的夢，試著忘記它們的存在。

整晚我都掙扎著想擺脫它，第二天，我起得很早，因為昨天晚上幾乎沒吃東西，已經(jīng)餓壞了！去廚房的路上，我匆匆地向客廳看了一眼，發(fā)現(xiàn)爸爸睡在沙發(fā)上。

這是個不好的兆頭。它意味著家庭戰(zhàn)爭還沒有結(jié)束，讓我變得像個自己領(lǐng)土的侵入者。

他翻了個身，哼哼著，在又小又薄的被子下面蜷縮得更緊了，沖著枕頭咕噥著，聽上去絕對不是什么好話。

我溜進(jìn)廚房，給自己倒了一大碗玉米片。正要倒牛奶的時候，媽媽悄無聲息地溜進(jìn)廚房，搶走了牛奶?！澳愕迷俚纫粫?，年輕人，”她說，“周日的早餐，全家人必須一起吃?！?/p>

“可是我快餓死了！”

“我們也是。出去吧！我要做薄餅，而你應(yīng)該去洗個澡。走吧！”好像洗澡能遏制住即將到來的饑餓感似的。

我下樓朝浴室走去，發(fā)現(xiàn)客廳已經(jīng)沒人了。

被子疊起來放在扶手椅上，枕頭不見了……剛才我看到的仿佛只是一場夢。

吃早餐的時候，爸爸表現(xiàn)得一點兒也不像在沙發(fā)上睡了一夜。沒有眼袋，沒有胡楂。他穿上一條網(wǎng)球褲和一件淡紫色的Polo衫，頭發(fā)吹得像工作日時一樣。

我個人認(rèn)為他衣服的顏色有點娘，不過媽媽說：“你今天看起來很精神，瑞克?！?/p>

爸爸只是猜疑地看著她。

外公進(jìn)來了，說：“佩西，滿屋都是香味！早上好，瑞克。嗨，布萊斯?！彼碌臅r候朝我使了個眼色，把餐巾鋪在膝蓋上。

“利——奈——特，”媽媽喊道，“吃——早——飯——了！”

姐姐現(xiàn)身了，穿著短得不能再短的迷你裙、松糕鞋，眼睛涂抹得活像一只浣熊。媽媽倒抽一口涼氣，但她深呼吸一下，說：“早上好，寶貝。你……你看起來……我想你今天早上是要和朋友一起去教堂吧?！?/p>

“是的?！崩翁乩?，在桌邊坐下。

媽媽端上薄餅、煎蛋和土豆煎餅。爸爸一動不動地坐了一會兒，最后還是抖開了餐巾，塞在領(lǐng)子上。

“好吧，”媽媽坐下的時候宣布，“針對現(xiàn)在的情況，我想出了一個解決辦法?！?/p>

“開始了……”爸爸嘟囔著，但媽媽瞪了他一眼，他馬上不說話了。

“這個辦法是……”媽媽邊給自己拿了兩張薄餅邊說，“我們請貝克一家來吃飯。”

爸爸脫口而出：“你說什么？”利奈特問：“請他們?nèi)遥俊蔽也暹M(jìn)去問：“你是當(dāng)真的嗎？”只有外公又盛了一個煎蛋，然后說：“佩西，這是個好主意?！?/p>

“謝謝，爸爸，”她微笑著答道，然后對利奈特和我說，“我當(dāng)然是認(rèn)真的，是的，如果朱莉和男孩子們愿意，他們也在被邀請之列?！?/p>

姐姐大笑起來：“你知道自己在說什么嗎？”

媽媽在膝蓋上攤平餐巾：“我想我馬上就知道了。”

利奈特轉(zhuǎn)過頭看著我：“她想邀請‘神秘小便’的核心成員來吃飯——哦，我真盼著快點看到那個場面！”

爸爸搖了搖頭：“佩西，你請他們吃飯有什么目的？沒錯，我昨晚確實說了些不該說的話。這是你對我新一輪的懲罰嗎？”

“我們幾年前就該這么做?！?/p>

“佩西，拜托。我知道你為你聽到的事情感到難過，但一次尷尬的晚餐聚會也改變不了什么！”

媽媽把糖漿倒在薄餅上，卷起最上面的一張，舔舔手指，然后狠狠地盯著爸爸：“我們要請貝克家來吃飯?！?/p>

她一定要這么做，不用再說什么了。

爸爸做了個深呼吸，然后嘆著氣說：“好吧，隨便你，佩西。別說我沒提醒你?！彼Я艘豢谕炼辜屣灒斓卣f，“我想，是請他們過來燒烤？”

“不，瑞克。一次正式的晚餐。就像招待你的客戶一樣。”

他停止咀嚼：“你指望他們正裝出席？”

媽媽瞥了他一眼：“我指望的是，你像我一貫以為的那樣，表現(xiàn)得像個紳士。”

爸爸埋頭對付他的土豆煎餅，總比和媽媽爭論來得安全。

利奈特吃掉一整個煎蛋的蛋白，外加幾乎一整張薄餅。

當(dāng)然，這沒什么稀奇，但從她比平時吃得更多以及咯咯傻笑的樣子來看，顯然她至少心情不錯。

外公吃得很多，但我不知道他在想什么。他又恢復(fù)成像塊石頭那么冷。而我則意識到，這頓飯可能遠(yuǎn)比想象的更為詭異——它可能會帶來麻煩。那些腐壞的雞蛋從墓穴里爬出來，懸在我頭上，越來越大，越來越臭。

當(dāng)然，外公知道這件事，可是其他家庭成員還不知道。假如吃飯的時候有人提起怎么辦？那我就死定了。

吃完早飯，刷牙的時候，我考慮收買朱莉。把她爭取過來，就不會有人提起雞蛋的事了。也許我可以想辦法破壞掉這頓飯。讓它永遠(yuǎn)也別發(fā)生。沒錯，我可以——我阻止自己再往下想，盯著鏡子。我到底有多懦弱？吐了口唾沫，我回到房間里找我媽媽。

“怎么了，親愛的？”她一邊刷著煎鍋，一邊問我，“你看起來有心事?！?/p>

我又巡視了一圈，確定爸爸和利奈特沒有潛伏在附近，然后壓低了聲音說：“你保證替我保密嗎？”

她笑了：“哈，我不知道?！?/p>

我等著她往下說。

“是什么……”她看著我，停下手上的活兒，“哦，看起來挺嚴(yán)重嘛。親愛的，怎么啦？”

我已經(jīng)有很長時間沒有自發(fā)地向媽媽坦白交代過什么事了。似乎沒有這個必要，我已經(jīng)學(xué)會怎么搞定自己的事。至少我是這么想的。但現(xiàn)在不一樣了。

她拉住我的胳膊說：“布萊斯，告訴我。發(fā)生什么事了？”

我跳起來坐在餐臺上，深吸一口氣，然后說道：“是朱莉的雞蛋。”

“她的……雞蛋？”

“是的。你還記得那次關(guān)于小雞、母雞、沙門氏菌的小插曲嗎？”

“那是很久以前的事了，不過我當(dāng)然記得……”

“呃，可你并不知道，朱莉不止送過那一次雞蛋。她那時每周都送過來……差不多吧?！?/p>

“是嗎？我怎么不知道？”

“好吧，我沒告訴她我們不想要這些雞蛋，又怕爸爸生我的氣，所以每次都把雞蛋攔下來。我看著她過來，趕在她按門鈴之前開門，然后在別人發(fā)現(xiàn)她來過之前，把雞蛋扔進(jìn)垃圾箱。”

“哦，布萊斯！”

“呃，我以為它們總有一天會停止下蛋！一只愚蠢的母雞能下多長時間的蛋？”

“但我聽說它們不再下蛋了呀？”

“是的。從上個星期開始。因為朱莉撞見我把雞蛋扔進(jìn)屋外的垃圾箱。”

“哦，親愛的。”

“就是這樣。”

“那么，你是怎么跟她說的？”

我低下頭，囁嚅著：“我告訴她，我們害怕沙門氏菌感染，因為他家的院子實在太臟了。她哭著跑了，接下來，她就開始整修她家的院子了?！?/p>

“哦，布萊斯！”

“就是這樣?！?/p>

她沉默了一會兒，然后用很輕的聲音說：“謝謝你的誠實，布萊斯，這印證了很多事?！彼龘u著頭說，“那家人會怎么看我們。”然后繼續(xù)刷鍋，“如果你想聽我的意見，那么這越發(fā)說明我們必須請他們吃頓飯?！?/p>

我低聲說：“你保證不把雞蛋的事說出去，對嗎？我是說，朱莉告訴了外公，所以他已經(jīng)知道了，但我不想讓更多的人知道，你明白的，比如說爸爸?！?/p>

她盯著我看了半天，然后說：“向我保證你記住了這次教訓(xùn)，親愛的?！?/p>

“我記住了，媽媽?！?/p>

“那好吧。”

我大大地松了口氣：“謝謝你?！?/p>

“哦，還有，布萊斯。”

“嗯？”

“你把這件事告訴我，我很高興?！彼谖夷橆a上親了一下，然后笑著說，“你是不是保證過今天修剪草坪？”

“是的?！闭f著，我向屋外跑去，準(zhǔn)備開始干活。

晚上，媽媽宣布貝克一家會在周五晚上六點過來，晚宴的菜單包括水煮三文魚、螃蟹海鮮飯，以及時蔬燉菜，誰也不許臨陣脫逃。爸爸嘟囔著說，假如真要請他們吃飯，還不如來一次庭院燒烤，至少他有事可做，可是媽媽狠狠地瞪著他，讓他不得不打消這個念頭。

好吧，他們就要來了。這讓我在學(xué)校見到朱莉的時候，感覺更不自在了。并不是說她開始興高采烈，甚至沖我揮手?jǐn)D眼。不是的，她又開始躲著我了。碰巧遇到我的時候，她會打個招呼，但不像從前，我每次都能在身邊看到她，現(xiàn)在她基本從我眼前消失了。她一定是從后門偷偷溜出去，并且找到了一條能穿行在校園里卻又不為人知的路。我不知道，但她就像是人間蒸發(fā)了。

我發(fā)現(xiàn)自己上課的時候看著她。老師正在講課，每個人的眼睛都應(yīng)該向前看……除了我。它們總是忍不住瞟向朱莉，這太奇怪了。這一秒鐘我還在聽課，下一秒鐘我已經(jīng)完全把頭轉(zhuǎn)過去，看著朱莉。

直到星期三的數(shù)學(xué)課上，我才明白是怎么回事。她的頭發(fā)在肩膀上披散開，歪著頭，看起來和報紙上的照片一模一樣。不完全一樣——不同的角度，也沒有風(fēng)吹拂著她的頭發(fā)——可她看起來就和照片上一樣，太像了。

想通了這件事，我沿著脊梁骨升起一股涼意。我很好奇——她在想什么？她對根式推導(dǎo)真有那么大的興趣嗎？

我盯著她的事被達(dá)拉·特萊斯勒發(fā)現(xiàn)了，上帝，她沖我露出了一個不懷好意的笑容。如果我不想點辦法，流言蜚語就會像野火一樣傳遍學(xué)校了。于是我側(cè)過頭對她小聲說：“她的頭發(fā)里有只蜜蜂，傻瓜?！比缓笾钢諝猓路鹪谡f，看到了嗎？就在那兒。

達(dá)拉轉(zhuǎn)著頭尋找那只蜜蜂，而我在那天剩下的時間里努力收回我的注意力。我絕不想跟達(dá)拉·特萊斯勒這樣的人糾纏下去。

晚上寫作業(yè)的時候，只是為了證明自己錯了，我又把報紙從垃圾桶里抽出來。一邊把它抹平，一邊告誡自己：這是扭曲的事實；這是我的想象；她根本不是那樣……

但她就在那里。數(shù)學(xué)課上和我隔著兩排的姑娘，正栩栩如生地出現(xiàn)在報紙上。

利奈特闖了進(jìn)來?！拔乙媚愕木砉P刀。”她說。

我啪的一下用活頁夾蓋住報紙：“你應(yīng)該先敲門！”她走近我，而報紙仍然很醒目，我只好盡可能迅速地把活頁夾匆忙地塞進(jìn)背包。

“你在藏什么，小弟弟？”

“沒什么，別再叫我小弟弟了！而且再也別想闖進(jìn)我的房間！”

“給我卷筆刀，我就走?！彼斐鍪?。

我從抽屜里翻出來扔給她，果然，她如我所愿地消失了?？墒菦]過多久媽媽就喊我過去，然后，好吧，我忘記報紙還放在活頁夾里。

直到第二天早上第一節(jié)課為止。上帝！我能怎么辦呢？我沒法站起來把報紙扔出去，加利特就在旁邊。

除此之外，達(dá)拉·特萊斯勒也在教室里，我敢說——她可時刻注意著那些任性的蜜蜂呢！被她抓住把柄的話，我就慘了。

像平常一樣，加利特湊過來拿一張紙，因為心里有鬼，我按住了他的手。

“哥們兒！”他說，“你怎么回事？”

“對不起?！蔽疫@才明白他只不過想拿一張橫格紙，而不是那張報紙。

“哥們兒，”他又說了一遍，“知不知道你最近老是魂不守舍的？有人告訴過你嗎？”他從我的活頁夾里撕下一張紙，卻看到了報紙的邊緣。他看看我，我還來不及阻止，他猛地把它抽了出來。

我朝他撲過去，從他手里搶下來，但是已經(jīng)晚了。他看到了照片。

在他開口之前，我惡狠狠地盯著他說：“給我閉嘴，聽見沒有？不是你想的那樣。”

“哇哦，放松點，好嗎？我什么都沒想……”但我明明看出他腦子里正在盤算些什么。他假惺惺地沖我一笑，“我相信你一定有個完美而充足的理由來解釋你為什么隨身帶著一張朱莉安娜·貝克的照片?！?/p>

他的語氣把我嚇壞了。就像他正預(yù)備著怎么把我放在全班同學(xué)面前嘲笑一番。我湊在他耳邊說：“別說出去，行嗎？”

老師叫我們倆安靜點，但加利特還在不停地沖我傻笑，還朝著活頁夾的方向挑起眉毛做鬼臉。課后，達(dá)拉假裝表現(xiàn)出冷淡而專注的樣子，實際上則是豎起耳朵對準(zhǔn)我們。她讓我一整天都心神不寧，也就根本找不到機(jī)會向加利特解釋。

不過，我能跟他說什么呢？報紙之所以在活頁夾里，是因為我不愿意被我姐姐看見？那可真是個好理由。

除此之外，我也不想為此找一些蹩腳理由。其實我很想找加利特聊聊。我是說，他曾經(jīng)是我的朋友，而最近幾個月以來，有太多的事讓我心煩意亂。我想，如果跟他聊聊，也許能幫我回到正軌，幫我別再想這些煩心事了。在這方面，加利特足夠可靠。

還不錯，社會科學(xué)課上，我們有時間去圖書館查閱資料，準(zhǔn)備寫著名歷史人物的論文。達(dá)拉和朱莉也在這個班，但我想辦法把加利特單獨拉到一個角落里，避開別人的注意。

一到?jīng)]人的地方，我就開始為了小雞的事痛罵起加利特。

他沖我晃晃腦袋：“哥們兒！你在說什么呢？”

“你還記得那次我們?nèi)ニ腋糁鴩鷻谕蹈Q嗎？”

“六年級那次？”

“沒錯。記得你問我什么是母雞嗎？”

他轉(zhuǎn)轉(zhuǎn)眼睛：“哦，又來了……”

“嘿，關(guān)于小雞，你什么也不懂。我把命都交給你了，可你根本沒把我當(dāng)回事。”

我對他講了爸爸、雞蛋、沙門氏菌的故事，還有我怎么攔截了將近兩年的雞蛋。

他只是聳聳肩，說：“就這樣唄?！?/p>

“嘿，可是她抓住我了！”

“誰？”

“朱莉！”

“哇哦，哥們兒！”

我告訴他我當(dāng)時是怎么說的，以及她幾乎馬上開始在整修前院的故事。

“好吧，然后呢？她家院子亂成那樣，并不是你的錯。”

“但是后來我才發(fā)現(xiàn)，那所房子根本不是他們家的。他們很窮，因為她爸爸有個智障的弟弟，他們需要，呃，付錢撫養(yǎng)他?！奔永叵蛭衣冻鲆粋€十足的傻乎乎的笑容：“智障？好吧，那能說明很多問題，不是嗎？”

我不敢相信自己的耳朵：“什么？”

“你知道的，”他說，還掛著那個笑容，“我是說朱莉?！?/p>

我覺得心臟開始怦怦亂跳，下意識地握緊拳頭。自從我學(xué)會不主動惹上麻煩以來，頭一次想把別人臭揍一頓。

但我們是在圖書館。除此之外，我心里忽然閃過一個念頭，如果我真的揍了他，他就會馬上告訴所有人，說我愛上了朱莉安娜·貝克，可我沒有！

于是，我擺出一副笑臉，說：“哦，好吧?！比缓笱杆僬伊藗€借口，能離他多遠(yuǎn)就離他多遠(yuǎn)。

放學(xué)后，加利特問我要不要去他家玩，可我一點兒興趣也沒有。我還是想揍他一頓。

我試著說服自己放棄這個念頭，但我連五臟六腑都在生這個家伙的氣。

伙計，他已經(jīng)超出了我的底線，超出了很多。

可我沒法把這件事徹底拋到腦后，因為，另一個挑戰(zhàn)我底線的人，是我爸爸。

Chapter 09

Looming Large and Smelly

BRYCE

Sunday I woke up feeling like I'd been sick with the flu. Like I'd had one of those bad, convoluted, unexplainable fever dreams.

And what I've figured out about bad, convoluted, unexplainable dreams of any kind is that you've just got to shake them off. Try to forget that they ever happened.

I shook it off, all right, and got out of bed early 'cause I had eaten almost nothing the night before and I was starving! But as I was trucking into the kitchen, I glanced into the family room and noticed that my dad was sacked out on the couch.

This was not good. This was a sign of battles still in progress, and it made me feel like an invader in my own territory.

He rolled over and kind of groaned, then curled up tighter under his skinny little quilt and muttered some pretty unfriendly-sounding stuff into his pillow.

I beat it into the kitchen and poured myself a killer bowl of corn flakes. And I was about to drown it in milk when my mother comes waltzing in and snags it away from me. "You are going to wait, young man," she says. "This family is going to have Sunday breakfast together."

But I'm starving!

So are the rest of us. Now go! I'm making pancakes, and you're taking a shower. Go!

Like a shower's going to prevent imminent starvation.

But I headed down to the bathroom, and on my way I noticed that the family room was empty. The quilt was folded and back on the armrest, the pillow was gone... it was like I'd imagined the whole thing.

At breakfast my father didn't look like he'd spent the night on the couch. No bags under his eyes, no whiskers on his chin. He was decked out in tennis shorts and a lavender polo shirt, and his hair was all blown dry like it was a workday. Personally I thought the shirt looked kind of girly, but my mom said, "You look very nice this morning, Rick."

My father just eyed her suspiciously.

Then my grandfather came in, saying, "Patsy, the house smells wonderful! Good morning, Rick. Hi there, Bryce," and winked at me as he sat down and put his napkin in his lap.

Lyn-et-ta! my mother sang out. "Break-fast!"

My sister appeared in a triple-X miniskirt and platform shoes, with eyes that were definitely of the raccoon variety. My mother gasped, but then took a deep breath and said, "Good morning, honey. You're... you're... I thought you were going to church this morning with your friends."

I am. Lynetta scowled and sat down.

Mom brought pancakes, fried eggs, and hash browns to the table. My father just sat there stiff as a board for a minute, but finally he shook out his napkin and tucked it into his collar.

Well, my mother said as she sat down, "I have come up with a solution to our situation."

Here it comes ... my father muttered, but my mother gave him a glare that shut him down cold.

The solution is ... my mom said as she served herself some pancakes, "... we're going to invite the Bakers over for dinner."

My father blurts out, "What?"; Lynetta asks, "All of them?"; I put in, "Are you serious?"; but my grandfather heaps on another fried egg and says, "That, Patsy, is a marvelous idea."

Thanks, Dad, she says with a smile, then tells Lynetta and me, "Of course I'm serious, and yes, if Juli and the boys want to come, they'll be invited."

My sister starts cracking up. "Do you know what you're saying?"

Mom smooths the napkin into her lap. "Maybe it's about time I found out."

Lynetta turns to me and says, "She's inviting the core of Piss Poor over for dinner — oh, this is something I really woke up expecting!"

My father shakes his head and says, "Patsy, what purpose does this serve? So I made some stupid cracks last night. Is this the next phase in my punishment?"

It is something we should have done years ago.

Patsy, please. I know you feel bad about what you found out, but an awkward dinner party isn't going to change anything!

My mother ran syrup all over her pancakes, popped the top closed, licked her finger, then locked eyes with my dad. "We are having the Bakers over for dinner."

And that, she didn't have to tell him, was that.

Dad took a deep breath, then sighed and said, "Whatever you want, Patsy. Just don't say I didn't warn you." He took a bite of hash browns and mumbled, "A barbecue, I suppose?"

No, Rick. A sit-down dinner. Like we have when your clients come over.

He stopped chewing. "You're expecting them to dress up?"

Mom glared at him. "What I'm expecting is for you to behave like the gentleman I always thought you were."

Dad went back to his potatoes. Definitely safer than arguing with Mom.

Lynetta wound up eating the entire white of a fried egg and almost a whole pancake besides. Plain, of course, but from the way she was glutting and giggling as she ate, it was obvious that at least she was in a good mood.

Granddad ate plenty, even for him, but I couldn't tell what he was thinking. He was back to looking more granite than human. Me, I'd started tuning in to the fact that this dinner could be more than awkward — it could be trouble. Those rotten eggs were back from the grave, looming large and smelly right over my head.

Sure, Granddad knew, but no one else in my family did. What if it came up at dinner? I'd be dead, fried, cluck-faced meat.

Later, as I was brushing my teeth, I considered bribing Juli. Getting her on board so that nobody brought up the subject of eggs. Or maybe I could sabotage the dinner somehow. Make it not happen. Yeah, I could — I stopped myself and looked in the mirror. What kind of wimp was I, anyway? I spit and headed back to find my mom.

What is it, honey? she asked me as she wiped off the griddle. "You look worried."

I double-checked to make sure my dad or Lynetta wasn't lurking around somewhere, then whispered, "Will you swear to secrecy?"

She laughed. "I don't know about that."

I just waited.

What can be ... , she said, then looked at me and stopped cleaning. "Oh, it is serious. Honey, what's wrong?"

It had been ages since I'd voluntarily fessed up about something to my mom. It just didn't seem necessary anymore; I'd learned to deal with things on my own. At least, that's what I'd thought. Until now.

She touched my arm and said, "Bryce, tell me. What is it?"

I hopped up to sit on the counter, then took a deep breath and said, "It's about Juli's eggs."

About her ... eggs?

Yeah. Remember that whole chicken-hen-salmonella disaster?

That was quite a while ago, but sure...

Well, what you don't know is that Juli didn't bring eggs over just that once. She's been bringing them over every week... or about that, anyway.

She has? Why didn't I know about this?

Well, I was afraid Dad would get mad at me for not telling her we didn't want them, so I started intercepting them. I'd see her coming, get to her before she rang the bell, and then I'd toss them in the trash before anyone knew she'd been here.

Oh, Bryce!

Well, I kept thinking they'd stop! How long can a stupid chicken lay eggs?

But I take it they have stopped?

Yeah. As of last week. Because Juli caught me chucking a carton in the trash outside.

Oh, dear.

Exactly.

So what did you tell her?

I looked down and mumbled, "I told her that we were afraid of salmonella poisoning because their yard was such a mess. She ran off crying, and the next thing I know, she's starting to fix up their yard."

Oh, Bryce!

Exactly.

She was dead quiet for a minute; then very softly she said, "Thank you for your honesty, Bryce. It does help to explain a lot." She shook her head and said, "What that family must think of us,"and got back to cleaning the griddle. "All the more reason to have them over for dinner, if you ask me."

I whispered, "You're sworn to secrecy on this whole egg thing, right? I mean, Juli told Granddad, so he knows, but I don't want this to spread to, you know, Dad."

She studied me a minute, then said, "Tell me you've learned your lesson, honey."

I have, Mom.

Okay, then.

I let out a big sigh of relief. "Thanks."

Oh, and Bryce?

Yeah?

I'm very glad you told me about it. She kissed me on the cheek, then smiled and said, "Now, didn't I hear you promise you'd mow the lawn today?"

Right, I said, and headed outside to trim the turf.

That evening my mother announced that the Bakers would be over Friday night at six o'clock; that the menu included poached salmon, crab risotto, and fresh steamed vegetables; and that none of us had better weasel out of being there. My dad muttered that if we were really going to do this, it would be a whole lot better to barbecue because at least that way he'd have something to do, but my mom positively smoked him with her eyes and he dropped it.

So. They were coming. And it made seeing Juli at school even more uncomfortable than usual. Not because she gushed about it or even waved and winked or something. No, she was back to avoiding me. She'd say hi if we happened to run into each other, but instead of being, like, right over my shoulder anytime I looked, she was nowhere. She must have ducked out back doors and taken round about ways through campus. She was, I don't know, scarce.

I found myself looking at her in class. The teacher'd be talking and all eyes would be up front ... except mine. They kept wandering over to Juli. It was weird. One minute I'd be listening to the teacher, and the next I'd be completely tuned out, looking at Juli.

It wasn't until Wednesday in math that I figured it out. With the way her hair fell back over her shoulders and her head was tilted, she looked like the picture in the paper. Not just like it — the angle was different, and the wind wasn't blowing through her hair — but she did look like the picture. A lot like the picture.

Making that connection sent a chill down my spine. And I wondered — what was she thinking? Could she really be that interested in root derivations?

Darla Tressler caught me watching, and man, she gave me the world's wickedest smile. If I didn't do something fast, this was going to spread like wildfire, so I squinted at her and whispered, "There's a bee in her hair, stupid," then pointed around in the air like, There it goes, see?

Darla's neck whipped around searching for the bee, and I straightened out my focus for the rest of the day. The last thing I needed was to be scorched by the likes of Darla Tressler.

That night I was doing my homework, and just to prove to myself that I'd been wrong, I pulled that newspaper article out of my trash can. And as I'm flipping it over, I'm telling myself, It's a distortion of reality; it's my imagination; she doesn't really look like that...

But there she was. The girl in my math class, two rows over and one seat up, glowing through newsprint.

Lynetta barged in. "I need your sharpener,"she said.

I slammed my binder closed over the paper and said, "You're supposed to knock!" And then, since she was zooming in and the paper was still sticking out, I crammed the binder into my backpack as fast as I could.

What are you trying to hide there, baby brother?

Nothing, and stop calling me that! And don't barge into my room anymore!

Give me your sharpener and I'm history, she said with her hand out.

I dug it out of my drawer and tossed it at her, and sure enough, she disappeared.

But two seconds later my mom was calling for me, and after that, well, I forgot that the paper was in my binder.

Until first period the next morning, that is. Man! What was I supposed to do with it? I couldn't get up and throw it out; Garrett was right there. Besides that, Darla Tressler's in that class, and I could tell —she was keeping an eye out for wayward bees. If she caught wind of this, I'd be the one stung.

Then Garrett reaches over to snag a piece of paper like he does about fourteen times a day, only I have a complete mental spaz and slam down on his hand with mine.

Dude! he says. "What's your problem?"

Sorry, I say, tuning in to the fact that he was only going for lined paper, not newspaper.

Dude, he says again. "You know you've been really spaced lately? Anyone else tell you that?" He rips a piece of paper out of my binder, then notices the edges of the newspaper. He eyes me, and before I can stop him, he whips it out.

I pounce on him and tear it out of his hands, but it's too late. He's seen her picture.

Before he can say a word, I get in his face and say, "You shut up, you hear me? This is not what you think."

Whoa, kick back, will ya? I wasn't thinking anything... But I could see the little gears go click-click-click in his brain. Then he smirks at me and says, "I'm sure you've got a perfectly reasonable explanation for why you're carrying a picture of Juli Baker around with you."

The way he said it scared me. Like he was playing with the idea of roasting me in front of the whole class. I leaned over and said, "Zip it,would you?"

The teacher hammered on us to be quiet, but it didn't stop Garrett from smirking at me or doing the double-eyebrow wiggle in the direction of my binder. After class Darla tried to act all cool and preoccupied, but she had her radar up and pointed our way. She shadowed me practically all day, so there was no real window of opportunity to explain things to Garrett.

What was I going to tell him, anyway? That the paper was in my binder because I was trying to hide it from my sister? That would help.

Besides, I didn't want to make up some lame lie about it. I actually wanted to talk to Garrett. I mean, he was my friend, and a lot had happened in the last couple of months that was weighing on me. I thought that if I talked to him, maybe he'd help get me back on track. Help me to stop thinking about everything. Garrett was real reliable in that arena.

Luckily, in social studies our class got library time to do research for our famous historical figure report. Darla and Juli were both in that class, but I managed to drag Garrett into a back corner of the library without either of them noticing. And the minute we were by ourselves, I found myself laying into Garrett about chickens.

He shakes his head at me and says, "Dude! What are you talking about?"

Remember when we went and looked over her fence?

Back in the sixth grade?

Yeah. Remember how you were down on me for wondering what a hen was?

He rolled his eyes. "Not this again..."

Man, you didn't know jack-diddly-squat about chickens. I put my life in your hands and you dumped me in a bucket of bull.

So I told him about my dad and the eggs and salmonella and how I'd been intercepting eggs for nearly two years.

He just shrugged and said, "Makes sense to me."

Man, she caught me!

Who?

Juli!

Whoa, Dude!

I told him about what I'd said, and how almost right after that she was out playing weed warrior in her front yard.

Well, so? It's not your fault her yard's a mess.

But then I found out that they don't even own that house. They're all poor because her dad's got a retarded brother that they're, you know, paying for.

Garrett gives me a real chumpy grin and says, "A retard? Well, that explains a lot, doesn't it?"

I couldn't believe my ears. "What?"

You know, he says, still grinning, "about Juli."

My heart started pounding and my hands clenched up. And for the first time since I'd learned to dive away from trouble, I wanted to deck somebody.

But we were in the library. And besides, it flashed through my mind that if I decked him for what he'd said, he'd turn around and tell everyone that I was hot for Juli Baker, and I was not hot for Juli Baker!

So I made myself laugh and say, "Oh, right," and then came up with an excuse to put some distance between him and me.

After school Garrett asked me to come to his house and hang for a while, but I had zero interest in that. I still wanted to slug him.

I tried to talk myself down from feeling that way, but in my gut I was flaming mad at the guy. He'd crossed the line, man. He'd crossed it big-time.

And what made the whole thing so stinking hard to ignore was the fact that standing right next to him, on the other side of the line, was my father.