把他們一個(gè)人留在家里

把他們一個(gè)人留在家里

Parents’ busy schedules don’t always align with the demands of a new school year. With competing priorities inside and outside the home, some parents must decide whether their school-aged child can be left home alone for parts of the day. Whether parents are running a quick errand or working after school has let out, many factors should be considered before handing over the house key to a child.

家長們繁忙的時(shí)間表并不總是與新學(xué)年的要求相一致。由于家庭內(nèi)部和外部的優(yōu)先事項(xiàng)相互競爭，一些家長必須決定是否可以讓學(xué)齡兒童獨(dú)自在家呆上一段時(shí)間。無論父母是在跑腿還是放學(xué)后工作，在把房子鑰匙交給孩子之前，都應(yīng)該考慮很多因素。

According to the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services’ Child Welfare Information Gateway, only three states have laws regarding a minimum age for leaving a child unsupervised at home (Illinois, age 14; Maryland, age 8; Oregon, age 10), while other states offer guidelines. “Parents should be aware that if their state does not outline the legalities of leaving their children alone, the courts do recognize the child’s maturity level, the safety of the child, how long the child was left alone and the parents’ concern for the child’s overall welfare and steps taken to ensure their safety,” says Rolanda Mitchell, an education counselor at North Carolina State University.

根據(jù)美國衛(wèi)生與公眾服務(wù)部的兒童福利信息門戶網(wǎng)站，只有三個(gè)州有法律規(guī)定將兒童置于無人看管的家中的最低年齡(伊利諾伊州，14歲;馬里蘭,8歲;俄勒岡州，10歲，而其他州提供指導(dǎo)方針。“父母應(yīng)該意識(shí)到是否他們國家沒有列出獨(dú)自離開孩子的義務(wù),法院決定孩子的成熟度級(jí)別,孩子的安全,孩子多長時(shí)間獨(dú)處,父母關(guān)心孩子的總體福利和采取措施保護(hù)他們的安全,“Rolanda米切爾，北卡州立大學(xué)的一個(gè)教育顧問說。

What to Consider

要考慮哪些方面

“Parents should look for signs of responsibility when their children are with them before leaving them home alone. Are they able to follow directions without being told repeatedly? Do they only follow directions if you are there watching? If they only follow the rules when you’re watching, it’s unlikely that they will follow them when they are home alone,” Mitchell says. “School behavior can also be a good indicator because school is where children spend the most of their time without their parents watching. If they’re misbehaving or violating rules, they may do the same when they’re home alone.”

“當(dāng)孩子獨(dú)自在家之前，父母應(yīng)該在孩子和他們?cè)谝黄鸬臅r(shí)候?qū)ふ邑?zé)任的跡象。他們能在不被反復(fù)告知的情況下遵循指示嗎?只有在你在場的時(shí)候，他們才會(huì)遵循指示嗎?如果他們只在你看的時(shí)候遵守規(guī)則，那么他們一個(gè)人在家的時(shí)候就不太可能遵守規(guī)則。“學(xué)校行為也是一個(gè)很好的指標(biāo)，因?yàn)閷W(xué)校是孩子們大部分時(shí)間都呆在沒有父母看管的地方。如果他們行為不端或違反規(guī)定，他們獨(dú)自在家時(shí)可能也會(huì)這么做。”

Set Ground Rules

設(shè)定基本規(guī)則

Talk with your children to find out how they feel about shouldering the responsibility of staying home alone. Some children may be ready for it, while others may hesitate or be afraid. Parents should let their children know what’s expected of them, including setting a consequence and reward system. “The child should know what will happen if they don’t follow the rules. Additional television or computer time, or even getting to choose what’s for dinner can give them some incentive to do the right thing,” says Mitchell.

和你的孩子談?wù)?，看看他們?nèi)绾慰创?dú)自在家的責(zé)任。一些孩子可能已經(jīng)準(zhǔn)備好了，而另一些孩子可能會(huì)猶豫或害怕。父母應(yīng)該讓他們的孩子知道對(duì)他們的期望，包括設(shè)定一個(gè)結(jié)果和獎(jiǎng)勵(lì)制度。“孩子應(yīng)該知道如果他們不遵守規(guī)則會(huì)發(fā)生什么。額外的看電視或玩電腦的時(shí)間，甚至是選擇晚餐吃什么都能給他們一些動(dòng)力去做正確的事情，”米切爾說。

Safety First

安全第一

Safety is another major concern for parents. In case of an emergency, children need to know what to do and whom to contact. This information should be written in a way the child can understand and posted in a place they can readily see. Parents should also make sure their child has access to a phone. Creating a check-in system will put both the parent’s and child’s minds at ease about this new adventure.

安全是父母們關(guān)心的另一個(gè)主要問題。在緊急情況下，孩子們需要知道做什么和誰聯(lián)系。這些信息應(yīng)該以孩子能理解的方式寫下來，并貼在他們能看到的地方。父母也應(yīng)該確保他們的孩子有手機(jī)。創(chuàng)建一個(gè)簽到系統(tǒng)將會(huì)讓父母和孩子對(duì)這個(gè)新的冒險(xiǎn)感到放心。

Keep Your Child Occupied

讓孩子有事做

Tasks or completing educational activities are great ways to keep your child busy. “Give them chores to do that you have seen them complete successfully,” says Mitchell. “Start with giving them things assigned by the school such as homework, worksheets or assigned reading. It’s important to not only assign tasks, but to follow up to make sure it’s completed by asking to see it or asking for details about what they read.”

任務(wù)或完成教育活動(dòng)是讓孩子保持忙碌的好方法。米切爾說:“讓他們做你已經(jīng)看到他們成功完成的家務(wù)。”“首先給他們學(xué)校布置的任務(wù)，比如家庭作業(yè)、工作表或指定閱讀材料。重要的是，不僅要分配任務(wù)，還要通過要求查看或詢問他們閱讀內(nèi)容的細(xì)節(jié)來確保任務(wù)完成。”

If you decide to let your child stay at home alone, there are benefits, explains Mitchell. “It demonstrates a great deal of trust between a parent and child and can strengthen the relationship.”

如果你決定讓你的孩子獨(dú)自呆在家里，這是有好處的，米切爾解釋說。“這表明父母和孩子之間有很大的信任，可以加強(qiáng)關(guān)系。”