隱身斗篷錯(cuò)覺(jué)：你沒(méi)看見(jiàn)我，你沒(méi)看見(jiàn)我...

科學(xué)家最近為了描述一種常見(jiàn)的心理現(xiàn)象，想出了一個(gè)吸引人眼球的術(shù)語(yǔ)：隱身斗篷錯(cuò)覺(jué)。

According to the scientists, and their 2016 paper in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, we incorrectly assume that other people aren't paying nearly as much attention to us as we are to them.

根據(jù)科學(xué)家們2016年在《人格與社會(huì)心理學(xué)》雜志上發(fā)表的論文，這一術(shù)語(yǔ)用來(lái)描述下面的現(xiàn)象：我們錯(cuò)誤地認(rèn)為其他人對(duì)我們的關(guān)注并不像我們對(duì)他們的那么多。

That is to say, while you're bobbing along to music during your morning commute, casually taking note of the fidgety fellow on your right, there's a good chance said fidgety fellow is casually taking note of you and your lack of rhythm.

也就是說(shuō)，當(dāng)你上下班途中徜徉于耳機(jī)的音樂(lè)之中時(shí)，一眼瞥到右手邊那個(gè)滿臉煩躁的家伙，并在心里留下了印象;很有可能，與此同時(shí)這個(gè)煩躁的家伙也記住了你。

Consider one study described in the 2016 paper.

2016年的論文中描述了他們的實(shí)驗(yàn)設(shè)計(jì)。

A pair of students were asked to bide their time in a "waiting room" before an experiment – little did they know, they were already participating in the experiment. After sitting in the waiting room, the students were asked to indicate how much they'd noticed the other person in the room (their behaviour, mannerisms, and appearance).

兩人一組的學(xué)生在實(shí)驗(yàn)前被要求在“等候室”等待叫到他們的排號(hào)——他們完全不知道，實(shí)驗(yàn)實(shí)際上早已開(kāi)始。等他們被叫了進(jìn)去后，實(shí)驗(yàn)人員要求學(xué)生盡可能詳細(xì)地描述一下他們觀察到的房間里的其他人(他們的行為，舉止和外表)。

They were also asked to indicate how much they thought the other person had noticed the same things about them.

他們還被提問(wèn)，他們認(rèn)為另一個(gè)人是否能注意到他們之間的相同之處。

As one of the paper's authors, Erica J. Boothby, writes in a New York Timesop-ed, "Although people surreptitiously noticed all kinds of details about each other – clothing, personality, mood – we found that people were convinced that the other person wasn't watching them much, if at all."

作為論文的作者之一，Erica J. Boothby在《紐約時(shí)報(bào)》專欄文章中寫(xiě)道：“雖然人們偷偷地注意到彼此的各種細(xì)節(jié)——服裝、個(gè)性、情緒——但我們發(fā)現(xiàn)人們傾向于相信只有自己才是唯一的觀察者，而其他人并沒(méi)有注意到自己。”

I learned about this phenomenon while reading Cringeworthy by Melissa Dahl, which explores the science of awkwardness in everyday life.

Melissa Dahl的在專欄Cringeworthy中介紹了這一現(xiàn)象，Melissa Dahl專門(mén)探討日常生活中各種尷尬事情背后的科學(xué)原理。

Dahl describes the "invisibility cloak illusion" in the context of a related psychological phenomenon, called the "spotlight effect."

“隱形斗篷錯(cuò)覺(jué)”誕生于其他相關(guān)心理現(xiàn)象的背景下，那被稱為“聚光燈效應(yīng)”。

In 2000, psychologists found that people aren't paying nearly as much attention as we think they are to the things we're self-conscious about.

在2000年，心理學(xué)家發(fā)現(xiàn)人們并沒(méi)有像我們認(rèn)為的那樣關(guān)注那些我們自覺(jué)有趣的事情。

In a now well-known study, students walked around a party in a Barry Manilow T-shirt and ended up wildly overestimating how much the other party guests noticed their attire.

在一項(xiàng)現(xiàn)在眾所周知的研究中，學(xué)生們穿著B(niǎo)arry Manilow T恤參加派對(duì)，最終高估了其他派對(duì)的客人對(duì)他們服裝的關(guān)注度。

The title of the Times op-ed says it all: "You're too focused on what you're too focused on."

泰晤士報(bào)專欄所用的標(biāo)題開(kāi)門(mén)見(jiàn)山：“你太專注于你所關(guān)注的事情了”。

There are benefits to realising that other people are thinking about you as much as you're thinking about them

意識(shí)到其他人正在打量你，就像你正在打量他們，這對(duì)大家都有好處。

The point here isn't to feel self-conscious whenever you're in public. Instead, as Boothby suggests in The Times op-ed, it's to understand how miscommunication can happen.

這里的重點(diǎn)是，在公共場(chǎng)合無(wú)論何時(shí)，都不要有過(guò)高的自我意識(shí)。相反，正如Boothby為《泰晤士報(bào)》所撰寫(xiě)的專欄文章中所建議的那樣。

For example, she writes: "Employees pull their hair out in frustration while bosses obliviously believe their instructions are simple and straightforward."

她寫(xiě)道：“員工抓狂地薅掉頭發(fā)，而老板卻認(rèn)為他們的指示簡(jiǎn)單明了。”

Meanwhile, Margaret S. Clark, another author on the paper, told Psychology Today that it's worth remembering how much other people may in fact be thinking about you.

與此同時(shí)，論文的另一位作者M(jìn)argaret S. Clark告訴“今日心理學(xué)”：請(qǐng)記住，其他人實(shí)際上可能也正在猜度你的想法。

Clark said, "If I want to go out to lunch with you, and I think that I'm thinking it more than you'rethinking it, then I might be hesitant to ask."

Clark說(shuō)：“如果我想和你一起出去吃午飯，我覺(jué)得我考慮的東西比你所想的更多，那么我可能會(huì)猶豫不決。”

So: Remove your invisibility cloak and ask. The other person might be pleasantly surprised, and relieved.

所以：脫下你的隱形斗篷然后直接去問(wèn)他。另一個(gè)人可能會(huì)感到驚喜，并大大松了一口氣。