戀愛物語6招教你迅速洞察偽善的朋友

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If you have a friend who sometimes acts more like an enemy, you may have a frenemy on your hands. These guidelines will help you sort it out.

You Will NeedSelf-awareness
Honest appraisal

Step 1: Gauge their reactions 觀察“朋友”的反映
Notice how they react when you have good news. Do they seem genuinely happy for you, or do they respond with barbed comments and backhanded compliments?

Step 2: Assess their supportiveness 評定“朋友”的支持度
Assess their supportiveness. Do they sabotage your self-improvement efforts — perhaps even egg you on to be self-destructive? A true friend has your best interests at heart.

Step 3: Misery loves company 落井下石的“朋友"
Ask yourself if your misery attracts their company. Frenemies like you best when you’re at your worst.

Step 4: Note how you feel around them 體會(huì)和“朋友”在一起的感受
Note how you feel after you’ve spent time with them: Good friends are uplifting; frenemies leave you feeling annoyed with them or bad about yourself. Or both.

If you both cancel plans more than you keep them, you might be frenemies.

Step 5: Note how you behave around them 觀察和“朋友”在一起的行為
Note how you behave around them. Do they bring out the best or worst in you? Frenemies do the latter.

Step 6: Examine your own conscience 捫心自問
Examine your own conscience. Do any of the preceding bad behaviors apply to the way you treat any of your pals? If so, my friend, you yourself could be a frenemy!

The word “frenemy,” which originated in 1977, was added to the Merriam-Webster dictionary in 2009.

[重點(diǎn)詞匯]

gauge

   vt.1.計(jì)量, 度量
       A thermometer gauges the temperature.
       溫度計(jì)可測量溫度。
      2.估計(jì), 判斷
       It's difficult to gauge one's character.
      要判斷一個(gè)人的品格是很困難的。
      Can you gauge what her reaction is likely to be?
      你能揣測她的反應(yīng)可能是什么嗎?

sabotage

     n.1.（為防止敵方利用或?yàn)楸硎究棺h而進(jìn)行的）陰謀破壞，蓄意破壞
       The fire at the factory was caused by sabotage.
       那家工廠的火災(zāi)是有人蓄意破壞引起的。
     vt.1.陰謀破壞(某事物)
       They tried to sabotage my birthday party.
       他們企圖破壞我的生日晚會(huì)。

misery

      n.1.痛苦, 苦惱, 苦難
        The family lived in misery for several years.
         這家人過了幾年的痛苦生活。
        2.痛苦的事, 不幸
        I'm suffering the miseries of unemployment.
         我正為失業(yè)而痛苦。
        3.常發(fā)牢騷的人
         You old misery!
        你這個(gè)愛抱怨的老家伙！
        4.窮困；悲慘的生活

conscience

     n.1.良心
       I had a guilty conscience about not telling her the truth.
      我因?yàn)闆]有告訴她事實(shí)真相而感到內(nèi)疚。
       After he had committed the crime, his conscience was troubled.
      他犯罪后, 良心上感到很不安。
      2.內(nèi)疚；愧疚
      3.憑良心
spot

     vt.1.看出, 認(rèn)出
        I spotted him in the crowd.
        我在人群中認(rèn)出了他。
        How did you spot those fifties were counterfeited?
        你怎樣察覺出那些50元面值的紙幣是偽造的?
        2.注意到；發(fā)現(xiàn)