零距離美語(yǔ)會(huì)話[家庭]Lesson 5

所屬教程:零距離美語(yǔ)會(huì)話

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Five You can’t change a child’s behavior by using force!
你不能用武力改變一個(gè)小孩的行為！

1 Introduction
In America, children are well protected by law. If parents beat or kick their kids and the police know that, the bruises on the kids can cause the parents to be put in jail. Or sometimes the children will be separated from being with their parents and put in a social service, if the parents maltreat them. Sometimes the parents are punished, even when they have not harmed a child, but the authorities believe the parents have done wrong.
在美國(guó)，孩子是受到法律嚴(yán)格保護(hù)的。如果父母親打傷或踢傷小孩，警察知道后，小孩身上的傷痕就可以使父母親被關(guān)進(jìn)監(jiān)獄。如果父母親虐待他們的小孩的話，或者有時(shí)候小孩不能再和父母親生活在一起，而被送往社會(huì)服務(wù)機(jī)構(gòu)。有時(shí)候即使父母親沒(méi)有傷害小孩，但是官方認(rèn)為有罪的話，父母親還是得受到懲罰。

2   Sample Sentences
1. Have you ever asked your relatives, friends, neighbors, and colleagues at work about what kind of childcare do they use?
    你有沒(méi)有問(wèn)過(guò)你的親戚朋友、鄰居以及上班的同事，他們是怎么管教小孩的？
2. Does the kindergarten plan activities every day?
幼兒園每天都計(jì)劃有活動(dòng)嗎？
3. Are the children you see absorbed in what they are doing?
你看見(jiàn)的小孩有沒(méi)有全神貫注在做他們的事？
4. In general, the more adults there are, the more likely it is that your child will receive individual attention and adequate supervision at all times.
一般來(lái)說(shuō)，那兒成年人越多，你的小孩就更有可能時(shí)常被人照看到，被管理得更周全。
5. I know you want to have the feeling of security.
我知道你想有種安全感。
6. Regarding our son’s behavior, I suggest that he be treated with patience, affection, and respect.
關(guān)于我們兒子的行為，我建議你耐心照看他、愛(ài)他并且尊重他。
7. Doug and Beth often threaten very quickly to punish their son if he behaves differently from their expectations.
道格和貝斯經(jīng)常很快就威脅懲罰他們的兒子，如果他不聽(tīng)他們的話。
8. I think you already realize that punishment does not always produce good children, and many times harshness produces maladjusted children.
我想你已經(jīng)意識(shí)到了懲罰并不總是培養(yǎng)出好孩子，很多時(shí)候嚴(yán)厲導(dǎo)致小孩失調(diào)。
9. I assure you that the way to teach our boy to be a good person is for the adults around him to see the good in him.
我敢保證教育我們兒子做個(gè)好人的方法就是在他身邊的大人看到他好的方面。
10. Children learn to be happy by learning how to think.
   小孩子要想學(xué)會(huì)做一個(gè)快樂(lè)的人就是要學(xué)會(huì)怎么思考。

3 Conversations
1. A Chinese wife is talking to her American husband about their young son’s bad behaviors on the phone.
A: I don’t want you to be worried, but our son has some bad habits now. He says painful words everyday.
B: What words? Can you tell me?
A: He says “kick mommy, beat mommy, don’t want mommy” very quickly if I do something that he doesn’t like. You know, if I wash his face or change his clothes, things like that.
B: Honey, I don’t know what to tell you. Of course Tony is a young child. But do not underestimate1 his ability to learn and reason.
A: Yes, but sometimes he is just not reasonable.
B: I suggest you treat him with patience, affection2, and respect. If he needs to do something, like go to bed, or be washed, etc., please "guide or help" him to get it done, but lead him with gentleness.
A: It’s easy to say, but I will try.
B: Motivate3 Tony to cooperate4 by rewarding5 his good behavior. Do not emphasize punishment for bad moods, etc. Do not threaten6 him with punishment if he resists7 the actions you desire.
A: I know my parents sometimes threaten to punish him. But this doesn’t work; instead he picks up another bad habit.
【譯文】
——我不想讓你擔(dān)心，但是我們的兒子現(xiàn)在有些壞習(xí)慣了。他每天都說(shuō)些傷人的話。
——什么話？你能告訴我嗎？
——如果我做什么事他不喜歡，他很快就說(shuō)“踢媽媽、打媽媽，不要媽媽”。你知道的，像跟他洗臉或者換衣服之類的事。
——親愛(ài)的，我不知道該怎么跟你說(shuō)。當(dāng)然托尼還是個(gè)小孩子。但不要小看他學(xué)習(xí)、講道理的能力。
——是啊，但是有時(shí)候他就是很不講理。
——我建議你多點(diǎn)耐心，愛(ài)他，尊重他。如果他需要上床睡覺(jué)、或者被清洗之類的，請(qǐng)指引或者幫助他完成，但是一定要溫柔。
——說(shuō)來(lái)很容易，但是我還是會(huì)盡量去做。
——要和托尼合作好，你就要獎(jiǎng)勵(lì)他給他積極性。不要因?yàn)閴钠饩蛷?qiáng)調(diào)要懲罰他。不要因?yàn)樗话凑漳愕淖鼍屯{要懲罰他。
——我知道我的父母有時(shí)候就威脅要懲罰他。但是這不但不管用，反而他又學(xué)多了一個(gè)壞習(xí)慣。

2. Talking about punishment for young kids.
Chinese: Paul, you were also a parent of young kids before. So, can you tell me what you did when your kids didn’t behave very well?
American: I know Mark is your only child. You may do it differently from what I did. Sometimes I would tap8 their hands when they made troubles.
Chinese: I do it, too. You know, sometimes when we eat, my child would pull a dish towards him and grab9 it with his hands and eat. And if it were something he doesn’t like, he would spit it out and throw it into other dishes. He does it very often. I really get mad. I can’t help spank10 him sometimes.
American: And what does your husband do?
Chinese: My husband is an American. He criticizes me when I do that. He says that I can’t change a child’s behavior by using force. He is learning what I am doing now.
American: But spoiling11 a child is not going to do him good either！ You’ve got to have patience with him and teach him. It’s not easy, I know. It’s hard.
Chinese: Yeah. I’m still learning how to control his behavior and my temper. My child is almost two years old, and I’ve learnt the “distraction” 12 technique when he cries for something.

Additional Information:
Actually parents shouldn’t punish their children too harshly. It depends on what kind of thing the child has done. Besides, the child might break something by accident or he didn’t mean it. We should always give the child a chance to see his own mistakes.
實(shí)際上父母親不應(yīng)該過(guò)分懲罰他們的孩子。要看他們做錯(cuò)了什么事。而且小孩有可能是無(wú)意中摔壞了某東西，不是存心的。我們應(yīng)該永遠(yuǎn)給孩子一個(gè)機(jī)會(huì)讓他看清自己的錯(cuò)誤。

【譯文】
——鮑爾，你以前也是孩子的父親。那么，你能告訴我你的小孩搗亂時(shí)你是怎么做的嗎？
——我知道馬克是你唯一的小孩。你可能和我當(dāng)初做的不一樣。當(dāng)他們?nèi)堑湑r(shí)，有時(shí)候我會(huì)輕拍他們的手。
——我也這么做。你知道，有時(shí)候我們吃飯，我的小孩會(huì)把菜拖到他的面前，用手抓著來(lái)吃。而且如果是他不喜歡吃的，他就會(huì)吐出來(lái)，扔到其他菜里。他經(jīng)常這樣做。我很氣憤。有時(shí)候我忍不住打他的屁股。
——那你丈夫怎么辦？
——我丈夫是個(gè)美國(guó)人。他批評(píng)我那樣做。他說(shuō)我不能用武力改變一個(gè)小孩的行為。他會(huì)學(xué)我現(xiàn)在所做的。
——但是溺愛(ài)小孩也不會(huì)對(duì)他有什么幫助！你得耐心教他。我知道這并不容易。很難。
——是啊。我還在學(xué)習(xí)怎么控制他的行為和我的脾氣。我的小孩快兩歲了，當(dāng)他哭著要某樣?xùn)|西時(shí)，我學(xué)會(huì)了分散他的注意力。

4 Words and Expressions
1. underestimate 低估; 對(duì)...估計(jì)不足
2. affection 情愛(ài), 鐘愛(ài)
3. motivate 給...動(dòng)機(jī); 刺激
4. cooperate 合作, 協(xié)作
5. reward 獎(jiǎng)賞, 報(bào)償
6. threaten 威脅, 恐嚇
7. resist 抵抗, 反抗
8. tap 輕拍
9. grab 抓取, 霸占
10. spank (用手掌)打...的屁股
11. spoil 寵壞, 溺愛(ài)
12. distraction 分心, 注意力分散