GRE寫(xiě)作滿(mǎn)分范文五

"Wisdom is rightfully attributed not to people who know what to look for in life but to people who know what to overlook."

It is common sense to think or state that wisdom should be attributed to peopel who only know what to overlook in life. But is should also be attributed to people who only know what to look at in life. Reason for this is because all the people should be exposed to this concept of wisdom. Even if the people who tened to overlook at life may have more of a background from farther reading and reading and research which they may have engaged in, there has got to be a way to expose the other people who may not be as knowledgable, to this type of wisdom. In this way everyone will be able to take part in variouse discusion or debates that may be held based on the topicof what to Look For In Life. It is also very true that when the topic of overlooking or looking at life comes up in a discussion everyone in the room is likely to have a common of their own to add. Their for the wisdome that may based on it is for everyone and not only the most wise one.

Comments:

This response received a score of 2, not because of language problems, but because reasoning, analysis, and development are extremely thin and insubstantial.

This response displays serious weaknesses in analyzing the issue. Although the response states a position and offers limited support for the position, the reasons given are not always clear. The writer seems to be making an interesting point -- that more people should "be exposed to this concept of wisdom," but here, too, the meaning is not communicated clearly.

The response is further flawed by serious and frequent problems in language and sentence structure, which often obscure meaning.

This is not a 1 essay because the response does present a position with some support, and it is able to communicate some ideas clearly.