美國女博士為關注內在 堅持一年不照鏡子

Kjerstin Gruys, a 29-year-old PhD student in sociology, has mastered the art of avoiding her own reflection. For months, her daily schedule began with the typical teeth brushing, but a curtain covered the bathroom mirror. She inserted her contact lenses and applied her makeup by touch, not sight. Driving to work required glances in the rear- and side-view mirrors, but Gruys avoided peeking at her own image.

It was part of a unique experiment that Gruys hopes will help boost her own self-esteem and inspire others to stop focusing on external perfection. In her blog "Mirror, Mirror Off the Wall", she documents her yearlong effort to live mirror-free.

The project had its roots in Gruys' struggles with body image and her experience overcoming an eating disorder. In high school, Gruys said, she had insecurities about her appearance and suffered from anorexia.

Gruys launched her no-mirrors project in March 2010, while planning her wedding to then fiancé Michael Ackermann. Wedding dress shopping was not the pleasure-filled experience that she had expected. But instead, Gruys says dress shopping was a source of stress.

"I saw myself in the mirror and was being critical," she says. "I thought, well, maybe I should lose a little weight before the wedding, always a bad thing to focus on when you have a history of an eating disorder.”

Then Gruys read a passage in the book "Birth of Venus," describing an order of nuns in Renaissance Italy who had severe restrictions against vanity. "They didn't have mirrors in their lives. They were forbidden to look at each other when undressing. They were actually forbidden to look at themselves while they undressed."

For the first time in her life, Gruys said she was tempted to follow suit.

In the beginning of her mirror-free lifestyle, Gruys admits there were a few maintenance mishaps.

"The first month of the project ...when I was walking out the door...it was maybe a 50-50 shot that I had mascara on my nose."

But quickly, she learned to adapt. Gruys says she trained herself to avoid eye contact with her own image in windows and other reflective surfaces, trusted friends to tell her what looks good instead of relying on the mirror in dressing rooms. And she put complete faith in her hair stylist.

To the surprise of many, Kjerstin says the wedding day was actually one of the easiest days to navigate mirror-free.

"I'm getting my focus back to thinking about the real meaning of the day, which isn't how I look but marrying the love of my life," she said.

(Read by Nelly Min. Nelly Min is a journalist at the China Daily Website.)

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(Agencies)現(xiàn)年29歲的柯基絲汀•格魯伊斯是一名社會學博士研究生，她已經(jīng)精通了不照鏡子的藝術。幾個月以來，她每天早起刷牙時都用簾子蓋住浴室的鏡子。她不看鏡子，而是靠感覺給自己戴隱形眼鏡和化妝。開車上班時需要不時掃一下后視鏡和側視鏡，但是格魯伊斯也盡量不去看自己在鏡中的影像。

這是一項獨特實驗的一部分，格魯伊斯希望這一實驗能幫助她增強自信心，并鼓勵他人不要過分關注外在的完美。在她的博客“鏡子，把鏡子從墻上拿掉”中，她記錄了自己長達一年沒有鏡子的生活。

在這一計劃誕生前，格魯伊斯曾有過一段極力保持身材、患上和治療飲食失調癥的過往。格魯伊斯說，她在高中時對自己的外貌非常不自信，還患上了厭食癥。

格魯伊斯于2010年三月開始了她的無鏡計劃，那時她正在籌備自己和未婚夫邁克爾•阿克曼的婚禮。在婚紗店選購結婚禮服的經(jīng)歷并不如她想象的那樣充滿樂趣，與之相反，格魯伊斯說，選購婚紗對她而言就是壓力之源。

她說：“我看到了鏡中的自己，對自己的形象多有不滿。我想，好吧，也許我該在婚禮前減點肥，可對于一個有飲食失調病史的人來說，專注在這件事上總是很不妙。”

之后，格魯伊斯在《維納斯的誕生》一書中讀到了一段文章，文中描述了在文藝復興時期的意大利，為了嚴格遏制虛榮心理而讓修女遵循的一條規(guī)定：“她們的生活中沒有鏡子。她們被禁止在更衣時看對方。甚至連自己脫衣服時也不準看自己。”

格魯伊斯說，這是她有生以來第一次很想要去效仿一件事。

格魯伊斯承認，這種沒有鏡子的生活方式剛開始的時候，她在日常形象維護上會出一些差錯。

“在計劃實施的第一個月……當我走出門時，有50%的幾率我的鼻子上會粘著睫毛膏。”

但很快她就學會了適應。格魯伊斯說她訓練自己盡量不去看窗戶上或其他反射面上自己的影像，靠朋友來告訴她自己穿哪件衣服好看而不是依賴試衣間內的鏡子。而且她也完全信任自己的發(fā)型師。

讓很多人感到驚訝的是，柯基絲汀說婚禮那天其實是無鏡生活最容易的一天。

她說：“我的注意力回到思考這一天的真正意義上來，在這一天，重要的不是我看起來美不美，而是我即將嫁給我生命中的摯愛。”