你可以在10周內(nèi)改變你的性格

你可以在10周內(nèi)改變你的性格

Do you wish you could be more outgoing? Or maybe you have a temper and would like to be more levelheaded?

你希望自己更外向嗎?或者你有脾氣，想要更冷靜?

Are you stuck with who you are, or is there really room for change? (Photo: lassedesignen/Shutterstock)

It might seem impossible to change such core aspects of your personality. After all, research shows that the Big Five traits — openness, extraversion, conscientiousness, agreeableness and neuroticism — are largely heritable, with 40 percent to 50 percent of our personality coming from our genes.

似乎不可能改變你性格的這些核心方面。畢竟，研究表明五大性格特征——開放性、外向性、盡責(zé)性、親和性和神經(jīng)質(zhì)——在很大程度上是遺傳的，我們性格的40%到50%來自于基因。

However, while our personalities are relatively stable, they do change over time, and new research reveals that we can actually elicit that change.

然而，雖然我們的性格相對穩(wěn)定，但它們確實(shí)會隨著時間而改變，新的研究表明，我們實(shí)際上可以引發(fā)這種改變。

How is such change possible?

這種改變是如何可能的?

Freud believed our personalities were developed by age 5. (Photo: bulentevren/Shutterstock)

Personality refers to individual differences in patterns of thinking, feeling and behaving, so altering your personality doesn't necessarily mean reworking your genetic code — it's about changing those mental patterns.

人格指的是思維、感覺和行為模式的個體差異，所以改變你的人格并不一定意味著重新編寫你的遺傳密碼——它是關(guān)于改變那些思維模式。

However, it wasn't always believed that such changes were possible.

然而，人們并不總是相信這種改變是可能的。

Sigmund Freud believed that our personalities were fully developed by the age of 5, so whoever we were in kindergarten was the same person we'd be in retirement.

西格蒙德·弗洛伊德認(rèn)為，我們的性格在5歲之前就已經(jīng)完全發(fā)展成熟了，所以無論我們在幼兒園里是誰，在退休后都會是同一個人。

But today we know this isn't true. As we mature, we all change in predictable ways that are normal responses to life events like working, attending college and having children, which typically cause us to become more conscientious and agreeable and less neurotic.

但今天我們知道這不是真的。隨著我們的成熟，我們都會以可預(yù)見的方式改變，這是我們對工作、上大學(xué)和生兒育女等生活事件的正常反應(yīng)，這些通常會使我們變得更認(rèn)真、更隨和、更不神經(jīng)質(zhì)。

The key is to consistently challenge yourself is to step outside your comfort zone, and this can result in growth.

關(guān)鍵是要不斷挑戰(zhàn)自己，走出你的舒適區(qū)，這能帶來成長。

Why it matters

為什么它很重要

By looking at policy through a personality science lens, researchers say we can help answer questions like how do we get children to be kinder and work harder at school? (Photo: FamVeld/Shutterstock)

New research in personality science digs deeper into this concept. The Personality Change Consortium, an international group of researchers committed to advancing understanding of personality change, agree on the need for persistence, but they also consider the influence of major life events. They reach the same conclusion: It's possible, but it's not easy.

人格科學(xué)的新研究更深入地探究了這一概念。人格改變聯(lián)盟，一個致力于促進(jìn)對人格改變的理解的國際研究小組，同意堅(jiān)持的必要性，但他們也考慮了生活中重大事件的影響。他們得出了同樣的結(jié)論:這是可能的，但并不容易。

But the scientists also ask another set of questions: Not just why you might want to change your personality but why public policymakers should recognize that it's possible and how policy should change to reflect that.

但科學(xué)家們還提出了另一組問題:不僅是為什么你可能想要改變你的個性，還有為什么公共政策制定者應(yīng)該認(rèn)識到這是可能的，以及政策應(yīng)該如何改變來反映這一點(diǎn)。

Implementing the change

實(shí)施變更

Acting comfortable in social situations can help you eventually feel that way. (Photo: Blend Images/Shutterstock)

For example, if you desire to be more extroverted, a therapist might coach you to pretend you're comfortable in social situations and to try striking up a conversation with a stranger. In other words, "fake it till you make it."

例如，如果你想變得更外向，治療師可能會指導(dǎo)你假裝在社交場合很自在，并試著和陌生人搭訕。換句話說，“假裝直到你成功”。

The more often you do this, the more new patterns of thinking, feeling and behaving will develop, and new pathways will form in your brain — in short, changing your personality.

你這樣做的次數(shù)越多，你的思維、感覺和行為就會發(fā)展出更多的新模式，新的路徑就會在你的大腦中形成——簡而言之，就是改變你的個性。

This exercise is similar to what Jason Comely did to overcome an anxiety disorder. As he grew more withdrawn, Comely realized what he feared was rejection and he decided to do something about it — by getting rejected once a day.

這個練習(xí)與詹森·科米利克服焦慮癥的方法相似。隨著他變得越來越孤僻，科米利意識到他害怕的是被拒絕，于是他決定做點(diǎn)什么——每天被拒絕一次。

He started by asking a stranger in a parking lot for a ride. Later, he went on to request discounts at checkouts and ask people for directions.

他先在停車場向一個陌生人要了一輛車。后來，他又去收銀臺要求打折，向人們問路。

By turning rejection into something he wanted instead of something he feared, Comely changed himself. He even began selling his Rejection Therapy cards to give others the opportunity to challenge themselves to overcome their fears.

通過把拒絕變成他想要的東西，而不是他害怕的東西，科米利改變了自己。他甚至開始出售他的拒絕治療卡，給別人挑戰(zhàn)自己克服恐懼的機(jī)會。

But can such changes really last in the long-term?

但這種變化真的能長期持續(xù)下去嗎?

"We don't know. That has not been studied yet," Brian Little, a psychology professor at the University of Cambridge, told New York magazine. "It's possible that with a lot — as in, many years — of practice, people can retrain themselves to behave opposite to their true natures."

“我們不知道。劍橋大學(xué)心理學(xué)教授布萊恩·利特爾在接受《紐約》雜志采訪時表示。“經(jīng)過多年的實(shí)踐，人們有可能重新訓(xùn)練自己，讓自己的行為與本性背道而馳。”