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書蟲5級(jí)《理智與情感》5.露西·斯蒂爾的秘密

所屬教程:書蟲5級(jí) 理智與情感

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2022年07月24日

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5. Lucy Steele's secret

The Palmers returned to Somerset the next day. But it Was not long before Sir John had more visitors at Barton park. On a morning's excursion to Exeter, he and his mother-in-law had met two young ladies, the Miss Steeles, whom Mrs Jennings discovered to be distant cousins. Sir John, always eager for society, immediately invited them to stay at the Park as, soon as they were available, and, most fortunately, they were able to accept the invitation almost at once.

The young ladies arrived. Their appearance was by no means unfashionable, their dress was elegant, and their manners were very polite. They were delighted with the house and furniture, and they happened to be so madly fond of children that Lady Middleton had an excellent opinion of them by the time they had been at the Park for an hour. Sir John hurried off to Barton Cottage to tell the Miss Dashwoods.

They are the sweetest girls in the world!' he said. Elinor smiled at this. She knew that, for Sir John, the sweetest girls in the world were in every part of England, with every possible kind of face, figure, and character. Sir John wanted the whole family to walk to the Park immediately and look at his guests. Kind, thoughtful man! It was painful to him even to keep a third cousin to himself. But in spite of his efforts, he could only gain the Dashwoods' promise to visit the Park in a day or two.

When the promised visit took place, they found nothing to admire in the appearance of the elder Miss Steele, who was nearly thirty, with a very plain face. However, the younger, Miss Lucy Steele, who was not more than twenty-three, had a considerable beauty. Her face was pretty, she had a sharp, quick eye, and she held herself with a certain air. Elinor soon noticed the pleasing manners and constant attentions with which they were winning Lady Middleton's approval. They were full of praise for the beauty and intelligence of her children, and full of admiration for Lady Middleton herself. Fortunately for those who use these clever tricks, a fond mother can never hear enough praise of her children, and therefore will swallow anything. Lady Middleton watched proudly as her spoilt children pulled the Miss Steeles' hair, stole their sewing scissors, and tore their books; she felt no doubt that the Miss Steeles were enjoying this quite as much as her children. She was only surprised that Elinor and Marianne should sit so calmly, without taking any part in the enjoyment.

How playful dear little William is!' she said lovingly, as her second boy violently pulled Miss Steele's finger. 'And here is my sweet Annamaria, such a quiet little thing!' She bent to kiss her daughter, but unfortunately a pin in her dress scratched the child's neck. Violent screams rang out, and the Miss Steeles rushed to help the suffering child. The little girl realized that the louder she screamed, the more attention she would receive, and nothing could be done to calm her. Finally her mother was forced to carry her upstairs, in search of her nurse, and the four young ladies were left in a quietness which the room had not known for many hours.

Poor little creature!' said the elder Miss Steele.

I do not think there was any real cause for alarm,' said Marianne firmly.

What a sweet woman Lady Middleton is,' said Lucy Steele.

Marianne was silent, as it was impossible for her to say what she did not feel. It was Elinor who was forced to reply.

She is a very fond mother,' she said, truthfully.

And the children!' cried Lucy. 'I love to see children full of life and fun! I cannot bear them quiet.'

I confess,' replied Elinor, 'that while I am at Barton Park, I never think of quiet children with any displeasure.'

A short silence was broken by the elder Miss Steele, who suddenly changed the subject by saying, 'How do you like Devonshire, Miss Dashwood? I suppose you were very sorry to leave Sussex. Norland is a beautiful place, is it not?'

We have heard Sir John admire it,' said Lucy quickly.

Elinor was surprised that the Miss Steeles seemed to know so much about her family. 'Indeed, it is a lovely place.'

And had you a great many handsome young bachelors there?' asked Anne Steele. 'I am afraid you may find it dull here. I do like a place with a lot of good-looking young men, but they must dress well and behave politely. I suppose your brother was quite an elegant young man before he married?'

Well,' replied Elinor, 'if he was before he married, he still is, because he has not changed at all.'

Oh dear, I never think of married men being handsome young men—they have other things to do.'

Good heavens, Anne!' cried her sister. 'You can talk of nothing but young men—you will make Miss Dashwood believe you think of nothing else!' And she turned to another subject.

This one meeting with the Miss Steeles would have been quite enough for Elinor, who disliked the vulgar freedom and foolishness of the elder, and the clever pretences of the younger. She left the Park without wishing to know them better. The Miss Steeles, however, thought differently, and so did the sociable Sir John. Soon the young ladies of both houses were sitting or walking together for an hour or two almost every day. Anxious that they should get to know each other well, Sir John had helpfully informed the Miss Steeles of all the details of the Dashwoods' lives, and soon Anne Steele congratulated Elinor on her sister's fortunate engagement to a very fine young man.

What a good thing to be married so young,' she added. 'I hear he is extremely handsome. I hope you may have such good luck yourself—but perhaps you have someone already.'

The Miss Steeles also heard from Sir John, with many smiles and jokes, about Elinor's suspected attachment to a young man who had recently visited Devonshire.

His name is Ferrars,' whispered Sir John, so that everyone could hear, 'but it's a great secret.'

Ferrars!' repeated the elder Miss Steele. 'Mr Ferrars? Your sister-in-law's brother, Miss Dashwood? A very pleasant young man. We know him very well.'

How can you say that, Anne?' cried Lucy, who nearly always corrected everything her sister said. 'We have only seen him once or twice at my uncle's.'

Elinor was astonished. Who was this uncle? Where did he live? And how did they come to know Edward? She wished very much to have the subject continued, but nothing more was said about it, and she preferred not to ask questions hereself.

In the next few days, Lucy missed no opportunity of engaging Elinor in conversation. She was naturally clever, and often amusing, and as a companion for half an hour Elinor found her quite pleasant. However, she knew nothing of books, music or painting, in spite of her constant efforts to appear well informed. Elinor pitied her for her lack of education, but disliked her insincerity, her dishonesty, and the narrow self-interest that lay behind all her words and actions.

One day, as they were walking alone together, Lucy said, 'You will think my question strange, no doubt, but do you personally know your sister-in-law's mother, Mrs Ferrars?'

Elinor did think the question strange. 'I have never seen her,' she answered, a little distantly.

Then you cannot tell me what sort of woman she is?'

No,' replied Elinor, cautious of giving her real opinion of Edward's mother. 'I know nothing of her.'

Lucy looked fixedly at Elinor. 'I wish I could tell you—I hope you will believe I am not just being curious or impolite.' She hesitated. 'I do want your good opinion. And I am sure I would not have the smallest fear of trusting you, indeed I would be very glad of your advice. I am in such an uncomfortable situation! I am sorry you do not happen to know Mrs Ferrars.'

I am also sorry,' said Elinor in great astonishment, 'if it could be of any use to you to know my opinion of her. But I never understood you were at all connected with that family.'

I do not wonder at your surprise. Mrs Ferrars is nothing to me at present, but the time may come when we may be very closely connected.' She looked shyly down as she said this, with only a quick look sideways at Elinor.

Good heavens!' cried Elinor. 'What do you mean? Connected—with Mr Robert Ferrars?' And she did not feel much delighted with the idea of such a sister-in-law.

No,' replied Lucy, 'not with Mr Robert Ferrars—I never saw him in my life—but,' fixing her eyes on Elinor, 'with his elder brother, Edward.'

Elinor looked at Lucy in silent astonishment.

You must be surprised,' continued Lucy, 'because of course he never mentioned it to any of your family. It is a great secret, and none of my relations know of it except Anne. I would never have told you, if I had not trusted you completely. And I really thought I ought to explain my behaviour in asking about Mrs Ferrars. I know Mr Ferrars will not be displeased when he hears I have told you, because he has the highest opinion in the world of all your family, and looks on you and the other Miss Dashwoods quite as his own sisters.'

Elinor forced herself to speak calmly. 'May I ask how long you have been engaged?'

We have been engaged for four years now.'

Four years!' Elinor still felt unable to believe it.

My sister and I often stayed at my uncle's house near Plymouth, here in Devonshire. Edward came to study law there for four years, and so we met, and became engaged. I was very unwilling to enter into it, as you may imagine, without his mother's approval, but I was too young and loved him too well to be as cautious as I ought to have been. Dear Edward! Look, I carry his picture everywhere with me.'

She took from her pocket a small painting and showed it to Elinor. Elinor's last doubts of the truth of Lucy's story disappeared as she recognized Edward's face.

You can't think how I am suffering,' continued Lucy. 'Everything is so uncertain, and we see each other so infrequently! I wonder my heart is not broken.' Here she put a hand to her eyes, but Elinor did not feel sympathetic.

Sometimes,' Lucy added, 'I think it would be better for both of us if I broke off the engagement completely.' She looked sharply at her companion. 'But then I cannot bear the thought of making him miserable. And to me, too, he is so very dear. What would you advise me to do, Miss Dashwood?'

I am afraid I cannot advise you in such a situation. You must decide for yourself.'

Poor Edward! His mother must provide for him one day, but he is so depressed about his future! Did you not think him unhappy when he arrived at Barton recently?'

Yes,' said Elinor, aware of yet another fact in support of Lucy's story.

He had been staying with us at my uncle's. It made him so miserable, not being able to stay more than a fortnight, and seeing me so upset. He still feels just the same. I heard from him before I left Exeter.' Taking a letter from her pocket, she waved the envelope in Elinor's direction.

Elinor recognized Edward's writing, and finally had to accept that they must be engaged. Her heart sank within her.

Poor Edward does not even have a picture of me,' Lucy went on, 'although I have his. But I gave him a lock of my hair in a ring recently, and that was some comfort to him, he said. Perhaps you noticed the ring on his finger?'

I did,' said Elinor. Her voice was calm, but her calmness hid an unhappiness greater than she had ever felt before. She was shocked, confused, and miserable.

Here their conversation ended, and Elinor was left alone, to think. She felt sure that Edward's affection was still hers. He certainly loved her, and had never intentionally deceived her. Unfortunately, he was now tied by an early and foolish engagement to a pretty, but insincere, vulgar and selfish girl, whose main interest lay in his future income. Elinor's tears flowed more for Edward than herself. She had lost her chance of happiness with him, but would only be miserable for a time, while he had nothing at all to look forward to in life.

Over the next few days, Elinor took great care to hide her unhappiness. She was glad to spare her family the shocking news of Edward's secret engagement, as she knew that their affection and sorrow would only add to her misery. At convenient moments, she returned to the subject in quiet conversation with Lucy. She learnt that Lucy was determined to hold Edward to the engagement, and that Lucy was jealous of her because Edward, apparently, always spoke of her with great admiration. Indeed, what other reason could Lucy have for telling Elinor her secret, if not to warn her to keep away from Edward?

Elinor realized with great sadness that Edward was not only without affection for his future wife, but that he had not even the chance of being reasonably happy in marriage.

* * *

available adj. someone who is available is not busy and has enough time 有暇的

swallow v. to immediately believe a story, explanation etc that is not actually true 輕信

truthfully adv. honestly 如實(shí)地

confess v. acknowledge or admit 坦白

suspect v. to think that something is probably true or likely, especially something bad 猜想,懷疑

fixedly adv. looking at only one thing 專注地

astonishment n. great surprise or amazement 驚愕

provide for to give someone the things they need, such as money, food, etc 供養(yǎng)

reasonably adv. to a satisfactory degree, although not completely 相當(dāng)?shù)?/p>

5.露西·斯蒂爾的秘密

帕爾默夫婦于次日返回了索美塞。但是很快約翰爵士就為巴頓莊園帶來(lái)了新的客人。一天上午,他和他的岳母在去??巳氐穆飞嫌鲆?jiàn)了斯蒂爾家的兩位小姐,詹寧斯太太發(fā)現(xiàn)她們?cè)瓉?lái)還是遠(yuǎn)房親戚。一貫熱衷于社交活動(dòng)的約翰爵士立刻邀請(qǐng)她們?cè)谟锌盏臅r(shí)候去他的莊園小住。她們幾乎馬上就接受了邀請(qǐng),這真是再好不過(guò)了。

這兩位年輕小姐來(lái)到了莊園。她們外表時(shí)髦,穿著高雅,舉止彬彬有禮。她們對(duì)房子和家具贊不絕口,她們對(duì)孩子狂熱的喜愛(ài)更使她們?cè)诘絹?lái)僅僅一個(gè)小時(shí)后就給米德?tīng)栴D太太留下了十分良好的印象。約翰爵士匆忙趕往巴頓小屋告訴達(dá)什伍德家的小姐們。

“她們是世界上最可愛(ài)的女孩!”他說(shuō)。埃莉諾聽(tīng)了這話笑了。她知道對(duì)于約翰爵士來(lái)說(shuō),英格蘭到處都是世上最可愛(ài)的女孩,她們有著各種各樣的長(zhǎng)相、身材和性格。約翰爵士想要達(dá)什伍德一家立刻動(dòng)身前往他的莊園去見(jiàn)見(jiàn)他的客人們。真是個(gè)善良體貼的人!對(duì)他來(lái)說(shuō),讓她們錯(cuò)過(guò)一個(gè)認(rèn)識(shí)他的遠(yuǎn)親的機(jī)會(huì)也是痛苦的。但是盡管他費(fèi)盡口舌,達(dá)什伍德一家只答應(yīng)一兩天后再去莊園拜訪。

當(dāng)達(dá)什伍德一家按照許諾來(lái)到莊園的時(shí)候,她們并不覺(jué)得年長(zhǎng)的斯蒂爾小姐相貌過(guò)人,她已年近30,相貌平庸。然而,年紀(jì)稍小的露西·斯蒂爾小姐確實(shí)是個(gè)美人。她不過(guò)23歲,有漂亮的臉蛋,明亮而活潑的眼睛,身上帶有一種獨(dú)特的氣質(zhì)。埃莉諾很快注意到她們賴以贏得米德?tīng)栴D太太歡心的得體舉止和持久的殷勤。她們不停地夸米德?tīng)栴D太太的孩子們漂亮聰穎,對(duì)米德?tīng)栴D太太本人更是充滿溢美之詞。一個(gè)溺愛(ài)孩子的母親永遠(yuǎn)聽(tīng)不夠?qū)λ⒆拥目洫?jiǎng),因此她會(huì)接受任何贊美,這對(duì)那些耍這種花招的人來(lái)說(shuō)真是幸運(yùn)。米德?tīng)栴D太太自豪地看著被她寵壞了的孩子們拉扯斯蒂爾姐妹的頭發(fā),偷走她們的縫紉剪刀,撕壞她們的書籍。她毫不懷疑斯蒂爾姐妹和她的孩子們一樣樂(lè)在其中。她只是奇怪為何埃莉諾和瑪麗安娜安靜地坐著而不與孩子們同樂(lè)。

“親愛(ài)的小威廉玩得多么起勁兒??!”她鐘愛(ài)地說(shuō)。她的小兒子正拼命地拉扯著斯蒂爾小姐的手指?!斑€有我的寶貝安娜瑪麗婭,多么安靜的小東西!”她彎腰去親吻女兒,但不幸的是她裙子上的一枚別針劃到了孩子的脖子。孩子放聲尖叫,斯蒂爾姐妹趕忙去安慰被弄痛的孩子。小女孩意識(shí)到她哭得越響就越受人注意,于是不顧一切地鬧,怎么也沒(méi)法讓她安靜下來(lái)。最后,她母親不得不抱她上樓去找她的保姆,把四位小姐留下來(lái),房間里已經(jīng)好幾個(gè)小時(shí)沒(méi)這么安靜了。

“可憐的小家伙!”年長(zhǎng)的斯蒂爾小姐說(shuō)。

“我不認(rèn)為有什么好緊張的?!爆旣惏材瓤跉鈭?jiān)決地說(shuō)。

“米德?tīng)栴D太太是位多么和藹親切的女士?。 甭段鳌に沟贍栒f(shuō)。

瑪麗安娜閉口不語(yǔ),因?yàn)樗霾坏娇谑切姆?。倒是埃莉諾被迫答話。

“她是個(gè)很愛(ài)孩子的母親。”她如實(shí)地說(shuō)。

“還有那些孩子們!”露西大聲說(shuō),“我喜歡看到孩子們活潑快樂(lè)!我無(wú)法忍受他們太安靜。”

“我承認(rèn),”埃莉諾回答,“在巴頓莊園的時(shí)候,我從來(lái)不覺(jué)得安靜的孩子有什么令人不快的地方?!?/p>

短暫的沉寂后,年長(zhǎng)的斯蒂爾小姐突然轉(zhuǎn)換了話題說(shuō):“達(dá)什伍德小姐,你覺(jué)得德文郡怎么樣?我猜你離開薩塞克斯郡很難受。諾蘭莊園是一個(gè)美麗的地方,不是嗎?”

“我們聽(tīng)約翰爵士稱贊過(guò)那里?!甭段骱芸斓卣f(shuō)。

埃莉諾很吃驚,因?yàn)檫@兩位斯蒂爾小姐似乎知道很多她家的事?!澳莾捍_實(shí)是個(gè)漂亮的地方。”她說(shuō)。

“那兒有很多年輕英俊的單身漢嗎?”安妮·斯蒂爾問(wèn)道,“我猜你可能覺(jué)得這里很沉悶。我喜歡有很多英俊小伙子的地方,但是他們必須穿著得體,舉止文雅。我猜你哥哥婚前一定是個(gè)很高雅的年輕人吧?”

“這么說(shuō)吧,”埃莉諾回答,“如果他婚前是那樣的話,那么他現(xiàn)在依舊是那樣,因?yàn)樗稽c(diǎn)兒也沒(méi)有變?!?/p>

“哦,親愛(ài)的,我從不把已婚男子看作英俊的年輕人——他們有別的事情要做?!?/p>

“天哪,安妮!”她妹妹大聲說(shuō),“你就會(huì)一個(gè)勁兒地談?wù)撔』镒印銜?huì)讓達(dá)什伍德小姐以為你除此之外就什么都不想了!”接著她轉(zhuǎn)換了話題。

這次與斯蒂爾姐妹的會(huì)面讓埃莉諾受夠了。她既討厭當(dāng)姐姐的粗俗的口無(wú)遮攔和愚蠢,又無(wú)法忍受做妹妹的自作聰明的假惺惺。她離開莊園的時(shí)候毫無(wú)與她們深交的愿望。然而斯蒂爾姐妹以及好交際的約翰爵士卻有不同的想法。不久之后兩家的小姐們幾乎每天都有一兩個(gè)小時(shí)在一起小坐或外出散步。約翰爵士熱切希望她們能很好地相處,于是把關(guān)于達(dá)什伍德一家的事都詳細(xì)地告訴了斯蒂爾姐妹。于是不久之后安妮·斯蒂爾就向埃莉諾祝賀,說(shuō)她妹妹能與一位非常優(yōu)秀的小伙子訂婚真是幸運(yùn)。

“那么年輕就能結(jié)婚是一件多么美好的事啊,”她補(bǔ)充說(shuō),“我聽(tīng)說(shuō)他帥極了。我希望你自己也有這樣的好運(yùn)——但是也許你已經(jīng)有對(duì)象了?!?/p>

談笑中斯蒂爾姐妹從約翰爵士那里聽(tīng)說(shuō)埃莉諾似乎與一個(gè)最近剛來(lái)過(guò)德文郡的年輕人之間有戀情。

“他姓費(fèi)拉爾斯,”約翰爵士低聲說(shuō),卻讓大家都聽(tīng)到,“這可是個(gè)天大的秘密。”

“費(fèi)拉爾斯!”年長(zhǎng)的斯蒂爾小姐把這個(gè)名字重復(fù)了一遍,“費(fèi)拉爾斯先生?是你嫂子的哥哥嗎,達(dá)什伍德小姐?他是個(gè)非常討人喜歡的小伙子,我們跟他很熟?!?/p>

“你怎么能這么說(shuō)呢,安妮?”露西嚷道,她姐姐說(shuō)什么她都會(huì)糾正,“我們只是叔叔家見(jiàn)過(guò)他一兩次而已?!?/p>

埃莉諾十分吃驚。這個(gè)叔叔是誰(shuí)?他住在哪里?他們是如何認(rèn)識(shí)愛(ài)德華的?她非常希望沿著這個(gè)話題繼續(xù)談下去,但是她們沒(méi)再多說(shuō),而她也不想追問(wèn)。

在接下來(lái)的幾天里,露西利用一切機(jī)會(huì)跟埃莉諾交談。她天資聰穎,說(shuō)話時(shí)常很風(fēng)趣,作為一起聊上半個(gè)小時(shí)的伴兒,埃莉諾覺(jué)得她還是挺好的。但是她對(duì)書籍、音樂(lè)和繪畫一無(wú)所知,盡管她一直努力裝出很懂的樣子。埃莉諾同情她缺乏教育,但同時(shí)又討厭她的不真誠(chéng)、不誠(chéng)實(shí)和她言行背后那狹隘的自私自利。

有一天她倆一起散步的時(shí)候,露西說(shuō):“你肯定會(huì)覺(jué)得我的問(wèn)題很奇怪,你認(rèn)識(shí)你嫂子的母親費(fèi)拉爾斯夫人嗎?”

埃莉諾確實(shí)覺(jué)得這個(gè)問(wèn)題很奇怪?!拔覜](méi)見(jiàn)過(guò)她?!彼卮穑跉庥幸稽c(diǎn)兒冷漠。

“那么你無(wú)法告訴我她是什么樣的人嘍?”

“我不能,”埃莉諾回答,小心翼翼地不把她對(duì)費(fèi)拉爾斯母親的真實(shí)看法透露出來(lái),“我對(duì)她一無(wú)所知?!?/p>

露西兩眼緊盯埃莉諾?!拔蚁M夷軌蚋嬖V你——我希望你相信我既不好奇也不想無(wú)禮,”她遲疑了一下,“我真的希望你對(duì)我有個(gè)好印象。我確信我一點(diǎn)兒也不害怕信任你,事實(shí)上我很樂(lè)意聽(tīng)你的建議。我的處境實(shí)在讓人難受!我很遺憾你不認(rèn)識(shí)費(fèi)拉爾斯夫人?!?/p>

“我也很遺憾,”埃莉諾驚訝地說(shuō),“如果知道我對(duì)她的看法對(duì)你有任何幫助的話。但是我從來(lái)都不知道你跟那個(gè)家族有任何關(guān)系?!?/p>

“你的驚訝并不讓我吃驚。費(fèi)拉爾斯夫人目前跟我沒(méi)有任何關(guān)系,但是也許有一天我們會(huì)成為親戚?!彼贿呎f(shuō)一邊羞澀地低下頭,很快地用余光瞟了埃莉諾一眼。

“天哪!”埃莉諾說(shuō),“你是什么意思?結(jié)親——與羅伯特·費(fèi)拉爾斯先生嗎?”想到要有這么一個(gè)妯娌她可不覺(jué)得高興。

“不,”露西回答,“不是與羅伯特·費(fèi)拉爾斯先生——我從來(lái)沒(méi)有見(jiàn)過(guò)他——而是,”她雙眼盯著埃莉諾說(shuō),“與他的哥哥,愛(ài)德華。”

埃莉諾吃驚地默默望著露西。

“你一定很吃驚,”露西繼續(xù)說(shuō),“因?yàn)樗隙ú辉蚰愕募胰颂崞疬^(guò)這件事。這是個(gè)很大的秘密,除了安妮外我家的人都不知道。如果我不是完全信任你的話,我也不會(huì)告訴你。我認(rèn)為應(yīng)該向你解釋一下我為什么問(wèn)起費(fèi)拉爾斯夫人。我知道費(fèi)拉爾斯先生聽(tīng)說(shuō)我告訴你這件事后不會(huì)不高興的,因?yàn)樗麑?duì)你們?nèi)叶加泻芎玫挠∠?,并把你和達(dá)什伍德家的其他幾位小姐看作他自己的姐妹。”

埃莉諾努力使自己用平靜的口吻講話。“能告訴我你們訂婚多久了嗎?”

“我們已經(jīng)訂婚四年了?!?/p>

“四年了!”埃莉諾仍然感到難以置信。

“我姐姐和我經(jīng)常住叔叔家里,就在德文郡,靠近普利茅斯。愛(ài)德華在那里學(xué)了四年法律,于是我們相遇并且訂了婚。就像你能想象的那樣,我非常不情愿在沒(méi)有得到他母親同意的情況下與他訂婚,但是那時(shí)我太年輕,而且實(shí)在是太愛(ài)他了,以至于我沒(méi)有保持應(yīng)有的謹(jǐn)慎。親愛(ài)的愛(ài)德華!你看,我無(wú)論到哪兒都帶著他的畫像。”

她從口袋里拿出一幅小小的畫像給埃莉諾看。認(rèn)出愛(ài)德華的臉的同時(shí),埃莉諾完全相信了露西的話。

“你無(wú)法想象我所受的煎熬,”露西繼續(xù)說(shuō),“一切都是那么不確定,我們見(jiàn)面的次數(shù)又那么少!我甚至懷疑我的心已經(jīng)碎了?!闭f(shuō)到這里她抬手擋住了眼睛,但是埃莉諾卻沒(méi)有感到一絲同情。

“有時(shí)候,”露西補(bǔ)充說(shuō),“我覺(jué)得解除婚約或許對(duì)我倆都更好。”她雙眼緊盯著埃莉諾,“但是一想到這會(huì)讓他痛苦,我就承受不了。而且我那么喜歡他。你會(huì)建議我怎么做呢,達(dá)什伍德小姐?”

“在這種情況下恐怕我給不了你任何建議。你必須自己決定。”

“可憐的愛(ài)德華!他母親總有一天得供養(yǎng)他,可他自己對(duì)未來(lái)是如此悲觀。你不認(rèn)為他最近來(lái)巴頓的時(shí)候很不開心嗎?”

“的確如此。”埃莉諾說(shuō),她意識(shí)到這又為露西的話找到了證據(jù)。

“他此前一直跟我們一起住在我叔叔家里。他只能待不到兩周,又看到我那么難過(guò),為此他心里也很不好受。他的情緒現(xiàn)在還是沒(méi)有好轉(zhuǎn)。我離開埃克塞特之前收到他的一封信。”說(shuō)著,她從口袋里拿出一封信朝埃莉諾揮了一下。

埃莉諾認(rèn)出了愛(ài)德華的筆跡。由此她不得不最終認(rèn)定他們一定是已經(jīng)訂婚了。她的心涼了。

“可憐的愛(ài)德華甚至連我的畫像都沒(méi)有,”露西繼續(xù)說(shuō),“盡管我有他的畫像。但是我最近給了他一束頭發(fā),他把它纏在戒指上,他說(shuō)那對(duì)他來(lái)說(shuō)是些許的慰藉。也許你注意到了他的戒指?”

“是的。”埃莉諾說(shuō)。她的聲音很鎮(zhèn)定,但是那鎮(zhèn)定下隱藏了她平生最大的憂愁。她感到十分震驚、困惑和痛苦。

她們之間的談話到此結(jié)束了,埃莉諾獨(dú)自一人留在那里陷入了沉思。她確信愛(ài)德華的感情仍然屬于她。他肯定是愛(ài)她的,而且從來(lái)不曾有意欺騙她。不幸的是,他現(xiàn)在被早先的愚蠢婚約綁住了,對(duì)方漂亮但虛偽、粗俗而自私,只看重他未來(lái)的收入。埃莉諾的眼淚更多的是為愛(ài)德華而非她自己而流。她已經(jīng)失去了跟他在一起共享幸福的機(jī)會(huì),但是她只會(huì)難過(guò)一段時(shí)間,而他這一生卻沒(méi)有任何指望了。

在接下來(lái)的幾天中,埃莉諾小心翼翼地隱藏她的苦惱。讓她感到欣慰的是,她向家人隱瞞了愛(ài)德華令人吃驚的秘密婚約,因?yàn)樗浪齻兊年P(guān)懷和悲傷只會(huì)加重她的痛苦。在方便的時(shí)候,她會(huì)跟露西悄悄地再回到這個(gè)話題上。她得知露西決心堅(jiān)持與愛(ài)德華的婚約,而且露西嫉妒她,因?yàn)閻?ài)德華總是毫不掩示地帶著愛(ài)慕的口吻談?wù)撍5拇_,露西向埃莉諾吐露她的秘密無(wú)非是警告她跟愛(ài)德華保持距離,除此之外還能有什么其他的理由呢?

埃莉諾十分難過(guò)地意識(shí)到愛(ài)德華不但對(duì)他未來(lái)的妻子毫無(wú)感情,甚至沒(méi)有在這份婚姻中獲得什么幸福的機(jī)會(huì)。

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