(雙語)月亮和六便士 第15章(4)

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As long as I thought he'd run away with some woman I thought there was a chance. I don't believe that sort of thing ever answers. He'd have got sick to death of her in three months. But if he hasn't gone because he's in love, then it's finished.

“只要他是同一個女人跑掉的，我總認為他還有回來的可能。我不相信這類事能鬧出什么名堂來的。不出三個月他對她就會討厭死了。但是如果他不是因為戀愛跑掉的，一切就都完了?！?/p>

Oh, I think that's awfully subtle, said the Colonel, putting into the word all the contempt he felt for a quality so alien to the traditions of his calling. "Don't you believe it. He'll come back, and, as Dorothy says, I dare say he'll be none the worse for having had a bit of a fling."

“哎，我認為你說的這些太玄虛了，”上校說，這種人性是他的職業(yè)傳統(tǒng)所不能理解的，他把自己對這種特性的全部蔑視都用“玄虛”這個詞表現出來，“別相信這一套。他會回來的，而且像陶樂賽說的，讓他在外頭胡鬧一陣子我想也不會有什么壞處的?！?/p>

But I don't want him back, she said.

“但是我不要他回來了?！彼f。

Amy!

“阿美！”

It was anger that had seized Mrs. Strickland, and her pallor was the pallor of a cold and sudden rage. She spoke quickly now, with little gasps.

一陣狂怒這時突然把思特里克蘭德太太攫住，她的一張臉氣得煞白，一點血色也沒有。下面的話她說得很快，每說幾個字就喘一口氣。

I could have forgiven it if he'd fallen desperately in love with someone and gone off with her. I should have thought that natural. I shouldn't really have blamed him. I should have thought he was led away. Men are so weak, and women are so unscrupulous. But this is different. I hate him. I'll never forgive him now.

“他要是發(fā)瘋地愛上一個人，同她逃跑，我是能夠原諒他的。我會認為這種事是很自然的。我不會太責備他。我會想他是被拐騙走的。男人心腸很軟，女人又什么手段都使得出來。但是現在卻不是這么回事。我恨他。我現在永遠也不會原諒他了?！?/p>

Colonel MacAndrew and his wife began to talk to her together. They were astonished. They told her she was mad. They could not understand. Mrs. Strickland turned desperately to me.

麥克安德魯上校和他的妻子一起勸解她。他們感到很吃驚。他們說她發(fā)瘋了。他們不理解她。思特里克蘭德太太在一陣絕望中向我求援。

Don't you see? she cried.

“你明白我的意思嗎？”她喊道。

I'm not sure. Do you mean that you could have forgiven him if he'd left you for a woman, but not if he's left you for an idea? You think you're a match for the one, but against the other you're helpless?

“我不敢說。你的意思是：如果他為了一個女人離開你，你是可以寬恕他的；如果他為了一個理想離開你，你就不能了，對不對？你認為你是前者的對手，可是同后者較量起來，就無能為力了，是不是這樣？”

Mrs. Strickland gave me a look in which I read no great friendliness, but did not answer. Perhaps I had struck home. She went on in a low and trembling voice:

思特里克蘭德太太狠狠地盯了我一眼，沒有說什么。也許我的話說中了她的要害。她繼續(xù)用低沉的、顫抖的聲音說：

I never knew it was possible to hate anyone as much as I hate him. Do you know, I've been comforting myself by thinking that however long it lasted he'd want me at the end? I knew when he was dying he'd send for me, and I was ready to go; I'd have nursed him like a mother, and at the last I'd have told him that it didn't matter, I'd loved him always, and I forgave him everything.

“我還從來沒有像恨他這樣恨過一個人呢。你知道，我一直寬慰自己說，不管這件事繼續(xù)多久，最終他還是要我的。我想在他臨終的時候他會叫我去，我也準備去。我會像一個母親那樣看護他，最后我還會告訴他，過去的事我不記在心里，我一直愛他，他做的任何事我都原諒他?！?/p>