第九季:第15集 情人節(jié)怎么過(上)
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Hey, gentlemen. Hello. If any of you are looking for something to do on Valentine's Day, Amy and I'll be streaming our firstever live episode of Fun With Flags.
各位好啊，好，如果你們有人還在想情人節(jié)要做什么，我跟艾米將首次在網(wǎng)上直播我們的《有趣的旗幟》節(jié)目
You're welcome to join us as we celebrate the timeless love affair between wind and flapping fabric.
歡迎你們加入我們，一起來慶祝風與飄揚布料那永恒的愛戀
Penny and I have dinner reservations that night, but any other time, no.
我跟佩妮那天晚上定好餐廳吃飯了，其他任何時間我們也不看
Sorry, Bernie and I are breaking in the new hot tub, if you know what I mean.
抱歉，我跟妮妮要給新浴缸來個"啟用儀式"，懂我說的是啥意思吧
Not a clue. Raj? Spending Valentine's Day with Emily.
完全不懂，拉杰呢，跟艾米麗共度情人節(jié)
You don't sound very excited about it.
你聽起來不是太期待啊
Oh, I am, I am. I g... I guess I'm still wondering if Emily and I are right for each other.
沒有啊，我挺期待吧，可能我還不確定我跟艾米麗到底適不適合
Does this have to do with that girl you had coffee with?
這不會跟喝咖啡的那個女生有關吧
You mean the strong, sexy angel I can't stop thinking about?
你是說那位我魂縈夢牽的身心靈完美女神嗎
Who can say? You've been talking about breaking up with Emily forever. Why don't you just do it already?
誰知道啊，你念叨著要跟艾米麗分手多久了，你為什么不趕緊分了得了
Yeah, just get it over with.
早死早超生
Well, you say it like it's easy. Have any one of youever broken up with anyone?
你們說得好像很簡單，你們之中有任何人跟別人分手過嗎
No. Not really. You know, uh, once I ordered an Uber by accident. I just got in and went somewhere.
沒，不太，有一次我不小心叫了車，我只能默默上車，隨便去了個地方
So, you really gonna break up with her?
你真的要跟她分手嗎
Yeah, I think so. Do you have any advice?
我想是的，有任何建議嗎
Well, I have broken up with my fair share of guys. I mean, how many times did I break up with Leonard? I stopped counting at four.
我這一生甩過無數(shù)男子，你知道我甩過萊納德幾次嗎，第四次之后我就不數(shù)了
All right, my advice to you is do it at her place so you can leave when you need to, uh, tell the truth, make it quick and be prepared for tears.
我給你的建議就是去她家提分手，這樣你需要走人時就隨時能走，實話實說，快刀斬亂麻，做好會有人噴淚的準備
Oh, I'm gonna do a precry before I go in there. Really dry myself out.
我已經打算在進她家前先預哭一場，先把我的眼淚哭干
She meant Emily. No, II really didn't.
她指的是艾米麗，沒，真的不是指她
You're seriously breaking up with me? Yeah.
你真的要跟我分手嗎，是的
And you thought right before Valentine's Day was a good time to do it?
然后你覺得在情人節(jié)前提分手是好時機嗎
You're right let's talk again in a few days.
有道理，那我們幾天后再談吧
Hey, Claire. Hi. It's it's Rajesh. I was I was wondering if you're free for Valentine's Day?
克萊兒，是我，拉杰什，不知道你情人節(jié)那天有沒有空
Sorry, I just got back with my boyfriend.
抱歉，我剛跟我男朋友復合
But I just broke up with my girlfriend.
但我為了你甩了我女朋友呢
Right before Valentine's Day? What an ass.
情人節(jié)前甩人家嗎，真是個渣男
Please take me back. Our love was meant to be! I'm gonna all alone on Valentine's Day.
求你別不要我，我們的愛是天作之合，我情人節(jié)要當單身狗了
Well, you were right tears.
你說得真沒錯，噴淚
Okay, and we are live in 22 minutes.
22分鐘后我們就要開始直播了
I'm nervous. I hope people will be around to watch even though it's Valentine's Day.
我好緊張，希望觀眾們能來收看，哪怕今天是情人節(jié)
People who are fans of an Internet show about flags? Trust me, they're around.
收看旗幟知識網(wǎng)絡節(jié)目的觀眾們嗎，放心吧，情人節(jié)他們絕對有空
Oh, and speaking of Valentine's Day, I haven't forgotten about you tonight.
說到情人節(jié)，我今晚才不會忘記你呢
What do you mean?
你什么意思
Well, you've become such an integral part of my life as well as this show, I felt it only right to include your name in the title.
你現(xiàn)在變成了我生命中與這節(jié)目不可分割的一部分，我覺得應該把你加入到節(jié)目名字中
That is so sweet.
你真是太貼心了
So from now on, this program will be officially known as Dr. Sheldon Cooper and Dr. Amy Farrah Fowler present Dr. Sheldon' Cooper's Fun With Flags. Catchy.
從今天開始，這個節(jié)目的名稱將會是謝爾頓·庫珀博士與艾米·菲拉·福勒博士傾情奉獻，謝爾頓·庫珀博士的《有趣的旗幟》，朗朗上口啊
I'm gonna check the temp on the tub.
我去檢查一下浴缸的溫度
Don't make it too hot.
別弄太熱
Sorry, but "too hot" is the only temperature I come in.
抱歉，但"太熱"辣是本美男唯一的溫度
Look at that you shaved it all. You're welcome.
看看光溜溜的青龍，不用謝
Um, question this is my first hot tub is it supposed to come with a rat flopping around in it?
提問，這是我首次泡按摩浴缸里面有耗子漂浮著是正常的嗎
Ew, really? Get it out. How?
真的嗎，快弄走，怎么弄
Uh... wish we had a skimmer.
我們有個漏勺就好了
Uh, you turn off the jets, I'll get a strainer from the kitchen.
你把按摩噴頭關掉，我去廚房拿濾網(wǎng)
I don't know how to turn off the jets.
我不知道怎么關掉噴頭
Good, I don't know where we keep the strainer.
很好，我也不知道你濾網(wǎng)收哪
Excuse me. Uh, bad news. The maitre d' said it's gonna be at least an hour.
借過，有壞消息，領班說至少還得等一小時
An hour? What? That's crazy. We have a reservation.
一小時，別鬧了，我們明明訂了位
I know. So what did you say?
對啊，那你怎么說的
Thanks, sorry to bother you. But I said it like a badass.
謝謝，抱歉打擾了，我用惡狠狠的語氣說的
All right, well, can't you, like, slip him some money or something?
你就不能比如...塞點錢賄賂他之類的嗎
Really? I've never done that before. Does it work?
真的嗎，我沒這么做過，真能行嗎
Do people like money is that what you're asking?
你是在問我"人們喜不喜歡錢"嗎
A... A lot of attitude from the woman who thought MC squared was a rapper.
某個知識量小到以為mc2是饒舌歌手名的人，脾氣倒是挺大啊
Now, is that a smart thing to say on a holiday that's basically national sex night?
大過節(jié)的你這么說明智嗎，今晚基本算是全國操操夜
I'm sorry. You're pretty, I'm stupid.
對不起，你很漂亮，我是白癡
Hello. Just checked again for Hofstadter. Still gonna be an hour?
你好，麻煩再看看到霍夫斯塔德了沒，還要等一小時嗎
I'm afraid so. Okay. Thanks.
恐怕是的，好的，謝謝
I think you may have dropped this?
這可能是你掉的吧
Did anybody lose a 20? I did.
誰丟了一張20塊，我
Oh, I took care of it.Okay, we are live in five, four, three...
我都處理好了，馬上開始直播5 4 3
Oh, wait. Oh, shoot, I already pushed the button.
等等，糟糕，我已經按下按鈕了
Never mind, we're live.
沒關系，直播已開始
Uh, hello and welcome to a special live edition of Dr. Sheldon Cooper...and Dr. Amy Farrah Fowler present...Dr. Sheldon Cooper's Fun With Flags.
大家好，歡迎收看直播特別版，謝爾頓·庫珀博士與艾米·菲拉·福勒博士出品的謝爾頓博士的《有趣的旗幟》
Consider tonight's episode a Valentine's Day gift for you, our viewers. It's also my gift to you.
請將今晚這一集當作送給你們的情人節(jié)禮物吧，觀眾們，同時也是我送你的禮物
That was clear, right? 'Cause you're not getting anything else.
這夠明顯了，對吧，因為你不會得到別的禮物了
Since we're live, you'll finally be able to reach out to us with your flag thoughts and flag questions.
鑒于我們是在直播，你們終于可以即時聯(lián)系到我們，提出你們的旗思旗問
Allow us to answer a few quick ones that we get all the time. Uh, uh, yes, I really am a doctor. Uh, yes, she really is my girlfriend.
我們先快速回答幾個常有人問的問題，是的，我真的是一名博士，是的，她真的是我的女朋友
No, I just blink a lot, it's not Morse code for "Rescue me."
不是，我只是習慣老眨眼，并不是在打摩斯密碼求救
Oh, uh, ok... Uh, here's our first call. Hello, and welcome to Fun With Flags. What's your question?
好的，有觀眾打進第一通電話，你好，歡迎來到《有趣的旗幟》，你有什么問題嗎
What is wrong with me? Why am I so selfdestructive?
我腦子是哪里有病，為什么我總是自我毀滅
Rajesh? Yes. Whenever things are going well, I always find a way to ruin it.
拉杰什，是我，每當事情一帆風順時，我總有方法毀掉它
You two look happy how do you do it?
你倆看起來很幸福，是怎么做到的
II think it starts with good communication.
我覺得是始于良好的溝通
Yeah, wait, that's not a flag question. Next caller.
是啊，等等，這問題跟旗幟無關，下一位
I hope you don't think I'm just saying this because it's Valentine's Day, but...
我希望你不會認為我這么說是因為今天是情人節(jié)，但...
I love you so much. I'm gonna put this down your robe.
我真的好愛你，我要把這玩意扔進你浴袍里
It's not moving, but I think it's still alive.
它不動了，但我覺得它還活著
Well, should we put it back in there a few minutes? No.
那該把它扔回去多泡幾分鐘嗎，不必
No, and it's not a rat, it's a rabbit. We need to save it.
這不是老鼠，是只兔子，我們得救救它
Well, how do we do that?
我們該怎么做
Um, I don't know, look it up on your phone. II'm gonna wrap it in a towel.
我不知道，你用手機查查，我拿毛巾包著它
"Taking care of injured rabbit." Okay.
"照顧受傷的兔子"，有了
Make sure it's comfortable and warm. Well, it was just in a hot tub. I'm gonna say "Check." Anything else?
確保它既舒服又暖和，它剛泡在熱水浴缸里，這條符合，還有別的嗎
To make sure it's not dehydrated, feed him an electrolyte solution. If it's not responding, use a warm cloth to wash its face and genitals. Yeah.
確保它沒有脫水，喂他一勺電解質溶液，如果沒有反應，用一塊暖布幫他擦洗臉和生殖器，好耶
This is ridiculous. You know, I'm gonna go talk to the maitred.
這真是太過分了，我要去找那個領班談談
What are you gonna say?
你要說什么
I don't know. I'm... I'm gonna flirt with him.
我不知道，我去嗲他幾下吧
I don't know if I'm comfortable with that. I'm still sleeping with you tonight. See if you can get a table by the window.
我不知道我是否能接受這事，我今晚還是跟你"睡"啊，你看看能不能弄到靠窗的桌子
Hi there. What's your name?
你好，你叫什么
Glen. Oh, boy, it is crazy in here tonight, huh, Glen?
格倫，天啊，今晚這里人真是超多啊，格倫
Well, you know, Valentine's Day.
情人節(jié)嘛，你懂的
Yes. Bet your girlfriend is super bummed you had to work tonight.
是啊,我猜你女友一定超級郁悶，你今晚得上班
Anyway, look, we have been waiting a while, and I just...
聽著，我們等了挺長時間了，我有點...
With all due respect, ma'am, there's nothing I can do.
恕我直言，女士，我無能為力
You don't have to call me ma'am. Okay.
你用不著叫我"女士"，好的
I mean, we're basically the same age. Okay.
我們應該年紀相仿，好的
How old are you? I'm 21. How old are you?
你幾歲，我21歲，你呢
Just shut up, Glen.
把嘴閉上，格倫
Come on, let's get out of here.
走吧，我們離開這里
What? Why? Because I'm young. Let's go.
為什么，因為姐年輕，走吧
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