我的四種生活

I live a life of four dimensions—a wife, a mother, a worker, an individual in society. Diversified roles, yes; but they are well knit by two major forces: an attempt to discover, understand, and accept other human beings; and a belief in my responsibility toward others. The first began in my childhood when my father and I acted out Shakespeare.He refused to let me merely parrot Hamlet’s brooding soliloquy, Lady Macbeth’s sleepwalking scene, or Cardinal Woolsey’s self-analysis. He made a fascinating game of helping me understand the motivations behind the poetic words.
我在生活中有著四重身份——既為人妻，又為人母；既有自己的事業(yè)，又是社會(huì)的一分子。是的，角色不同，但配合得很好，因?yàn)樗鼈兌际軆煞N主要力量的支配：一是努力觀察、理解和接受他人，二是對(duì)他人盡職盡責(zé)。第一種努力早在孩童時(shí)代我和父親一起“出演”莎劇時(shí)就開始了。無(wú)論是哈姆雷特深沉的獨(dú)白、麥克白夫人的夢(mèng)囈，還是伍思里主教的自我剖析，父親都不讓我機(jī)械地背誦，而是通過(guò)有趣的游戲幫我揣摩詩(shī)句中隱含的角色內(nèi)心活動(dòng)。

In college, a professor further sparked this passionate curiosity about the essence of others and, by his example, transmuted it into a deep concern, a sense of responsibility that sprang not from stern Calvinistic principles, but from an awareness of all I received—and must repay with gladness.
在大學(xué)時(shí)代，一位教授的言傳身教進(jìn)一步引發(fā)了我理解他人本質(zhì)的熱忱與好奇，從他身上，我學(xué)到了如何將這種熱忱與好奇轉(zhuǎn)化為對(duì)他人深切的關(guān)愛(ài)、對(duì)他人應(yīng)負(fù)的責(zé)任。這種責(zé)任心絕非源自卡爾文教派嚴(yán)格的教義，而是源自對(duì)我所獲得一切的欣然回報(bào)。

I believe this acceptance, this tenderness one has for others, is impossible without an acceptance of self. Just when or where I learned that the full quota of human weakness and strength was the common property of each of us, I don’t know. But somewhere in my late twenties, I grew able to admit my own drives—and, rid of the anguished necessity of re-costuming them, I was free to face them, and recognize that they were neither unique nor uncontrollable.
我相信人若不能接受自己，便不可能接受和善待他人。不知從何時(shí)何地開始，我意識(shí)到每個(gè)人都有優(yōu)點(diǎn)和缺點(diǎn)。在我快滿三十歲的時(shí)候，我學(xué)會(huì)了承認(rèn)內(nèi)心的沖動(dòng)，而非痛苦地將其掩飾，我泰然自若地應(yīng)付它們，因?yàn)樗鼈兡巳酥残?，只需善于駕馭。

The rich and happy life I lead every day brings new witness to the validity of my own philosophy, for me. Certainly it works in marriage. Any real marriage is a constant understanding and acceptance, coupled with mutual responsibility for one another’s happiness. Each day I go out strengthened by the knowledge that I am loved and love.
我想我的人生哲學(xué)是正確的——我度過(guò)的充實(shí)而快樂(lè)的每一天便是明證。我的人生哲學(xué)也適用于婚姻生活，因?yàn)檎嬲腋５幕橐龆冀⒃诜蚱拗g彼此不斷理解和相互接受的基礎(chǔ)之上，雙方應(yīng)盡職盡責(zé)，讓對(duì)方幸福。每天我外出工作，知道我的愛(ài)得到了回報(bào)，便渾身有了力量。

In the mother-child relationship, those same two forces apply. Words are useless to describe my efforts to know my own children. But my great debt to them for their understanding of me is one I have often failed to repay. How can I overvalue a youngster with the thoughtfulness, the imagination to always phone when a late arrival might cause worry? To always know how to reassure. How can I repay the one who dashed into adulthood far too young but has carried all of its burden with a firm, joyous spirit?
這兩種力量在母子關(guān)系之間也發(fā)揮了效用。我為了解孩子們所做出的努力遠(yuǎn)非文字所能形容，而孩子們對(duì)我的理解更讓我無(wú)以為報(bào)。是怎樣的想象力、心靈相通和體貼，讓一個(gè)孩子在母親遲遲未歸時(shí)總是打電話確認(rèn)她的行蹤與安危？他用稚嫩的雙肩快樂(lè)而堅(jiān)定地?fù)?dān)起成人的責(zé)任，我要怎樣做才能報(bào)答這位早熟懂事的孩子？

My job itself is a reaffirmation of that by which I live. Very early in my working life, I was a small cog in a big firm. Emerging from a tiny job, I found a strange frightening world. Superficially, everyone was friendly. But beneath the surface were raging suspicion, distrust; the hand ever ready to ward off—or deliver—the knife in the back. For years I thought I was in a world of monstrous people. Then I began to know the company’s president. What he had been I have no way of knowing. But at seventy, he was suspicious, distrusting, sure that no one was telling him the truth. He had developed a technique of pitting all of us against each other. Able to see the distortion he caused, I youthfully declared that if I every ran a business, it would be on the reverse principle.
我的人生信條在工作中也得到了印證。從業(yè)之初，我只是一家大公司的無(wú)名小卒。我從低微的職位慢慢晉升，發(fā)現(xiàn)公司是個(gè)十分古怪而可怕的世界。每個(gè)人表面上和和氣氣，暗中卻相互猜忌，人人自危，既怕自己背后射來(lái)暗箭，又想伺機(jī)捅人一刀。幾年下來(lái)，我覺(jué)得公司里每個(gè)人都是魔鬼，后來(lái)才發(fā)現(xiàn)這一切都是總裁一手造成的。他從前為人如何我無(wú)從得知，但年已七旬的他滿腹狐疑，不相信任何人，覺(jué)得所有人都在欺騙他，便運(yùn)用手段挑起員工之間的爭(zhēng)斗。明白了他何以能使人心扭曲，年輕的我暗下決心，他年我若自行創(chuàng)業(yè)，一定運(yùn)用完全相反的原則。

For the last two years, I have had that opportunity, and had the joy of watching people—widely different people, too—learn to understand each other, accept each other, feel mutually responsible.
兩年前我終于有機(jī)會(huì)自立門戶，有了觀察人的工作。我看到各種不同的人如何學(xué)會(huì)相互理解和接受，對(duì)彼此盡責(zé)。

My trials and errors have really synthesized into one great belief, which is that I am not alone in my desire to reach my fellow man. I believe the human race is inherently cooperative and concerned about its brother.
我的嘗試和成敗得失熔鑄成一個(gè)堅(jiān)定的信念——絕非僅我一人試圖理解與尊重他人。我相信合作與相互關(guān)愛(ài)正是人類的本性。